Disclaimer: It is not my intention to belittle anyone's beliefs or tell anyone how to raise their children and very sincerely hope this does not come of as such. This is just something I've been thinking about for a while and wanted to put out there.

DH and I have a friend, M. Well, he's DH's friend…they‘ve known each other for about 20 years and share similar feelings on several important topics. He was the best man at our wedding. He's a sort of stepdad to a 2 year old boy, B (he and his GF R are living together but not married. B calls him Daddy). M is incredibly smart, incredibly well-spoken, incredible passionate about his beliefs and political leanings (he’s about as far as you can get on one side of the political spectrum).

M is very nice as long as you agree with him the big things. If you don’t share his beliefs he automatically assumes you are an idiot and that you are being brain-washed. He’s very patronizing (Honestly we barely talk to them and I think DH is friends with him out of habit).

So anyway, last summer they all came up for our baby shower and spent a day with us. While we were hanging out at our house M started asking B (the 2 year old) questions. Like “B, what do you think of (insert politician here)” Answer “He’s a douche bag retard shit stain”. Cue adoring laughter from his parents and uncomfortable looks between me and DH. “Ok B, what do you think about (insert political party)?” Answer “(They) are dumb mother f*ckers and hate America”. And so on and so forth.

It really upset me to hear such hate and vitriol spouting from the mouth of such a little boy. It bothers me to think that he’s been taught to parrot some of the meanest, intolerant language from his parents--not just things he’s picked up from their conversations but things they’ve actually taught him to say. He can’t understand what he’s saying, and it concerns me that as he grows older he will continue spouting these sorts of things until he believes them to be true. The irony being that M loves to rant and rave about how children are being indoctrinated and brainwashed into religion but he’s doing the exact same thing to his son. The difference? Only the content.

The worst part for me was how cute his parents thought it was that this little toddler with big innocent eyes and a high little voice was calling the people his parents disagree with some of the worst names I’ve heard from even adults. They laughed and complimented him and high-fived him and in the meantime DH and I are side-eyeing each other in disbelief.

I know we all want what’s best for our children and of course we have the freedom to raise our children in our own belief systems but it makes me really sad to think that teaching our children such intolerance and hate can do nothing but deepen the chasms between us.

It bothers me even more now that I’m a mother. Because all I can think is how could anyone hate my sweet, innocent, beautiful child just because he believes something different than someone else does and I would be very upset and feel like I failed as a mother if my child hated someone else purely because they saw the world differently than him.

I feel like I will have done a good job as a mother if I can teach my son to be kind, to be tolerant, regardless of skin color, of religious belief or lack thereof, of sexual identity, of political leanings and to have empathy towards his fellow human beings.

Anyway, I guess where this is all going is that I think the world will be a better place for our children and our children’s children and so on and so forth if we raise them to be more tolerant and accepting of each other, and I hope you all feel similarly.