My husband and I are divorcing and we aren't planning on getting lawyers. We have agreed on custody arrangements for our daughter, child support, etc. I've read everything I can online and believe it is possible to file without a lawyer... but can anyone confirm this is true? We'd also like to avoid the court determining our child support payments since we have agreed on that... is that possible?
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I'm not sure but I know you will need to get everything in writing and both you sign it and make copies. Just in case he changes his mind or someone doesn't follow their side of the agreement.
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You def don’t need a lawyer but you’ll still have to file at the courthouse
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@cyoung: we do have everything in writing I just wasn't sure how well it would hold up in court (if it ever came to that) since it was just something simple we typed up & signed
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@mrskansas: sorry you are going through this. I am in Canada so I’m guessing it will be a bit different. I was able to complete my entire divorce with no lawyers. Filled out all the necessary forms on the government website and filed them at the courthouse. The guardianship and child support agreement was put into writing using a government mediator through family services. That also needed to be registered through the court. Plenty of paperwork and bureaucracy but doable. Overall filing fees were $200.
Sending love and strength.
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It may depend on your state laws, but when I got divorced, we were able to file without a lawyer. We agreed on everything and drew up our own papers based on online templates. We did each meet with an attorney to review the paperwork and make sure we were each covered legally. The review was a lot less expensive than if we had paid them to create the documents. Then my ex filed the papers (since he was the main one wanting to divorce). He had to appear in court and testify since he filed. I was in the audience but didn't testify. The judge granted the divorce, and it was done. I'm not sure about child support and custody though, since we didn't have any kids.
I'm sorry you're going through this!
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We are trying to do the same thing. No info just support.
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@mrskansas: your local courthouse should offer resources for “pro se” divorce and family matters. The staff there should be able to tell you exactly what you need to file and how.
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My friend filed for divorce a couple years ago, she just filled out all of the online forms from the courts website. They agreed on what debt and what assets went to who, went to a lawyer for review, and had everything notarized. She did have to take some online class due to not using a lawyer.
She had to go to court since she filed, they granted it, and that was it. You do have to have a million and one copies of your divorce decree to start changing your name, but I hear it's easier to change at divorce if you plan on going back, than it is if you wait.
They didn't have kids though, so I don't know about child support.
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O, my work friend said that the courts determined the child support amount, and didn't really ask. 🤷♀️
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Sorry to hear you are going through this. I have no advice but a thought, if you guys hashed it all out hopefully filing is straight forward but if you need a bit of guidance a mediator might be a big help and be cost effective.
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@Sams Mom: Yes, changing my name was basically the reverse of changing it when I got married. And the divorce decree is the legal proof, just like the marriage certificate would be. It was a pain, but especially since we didn't have kids, I didn't want any ties to his name.
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@Sams Mom: @krispi: I'm definitely keeping my married name... I've been married since I was 20 and want to have the same last name as our daughter. I don't think I would even recognize myself with my maiden name LOL
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@MrsSRS: I'm sorry to hear that
let me know if you ever need someone to talk to, it's such a lonely experience!
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@mrskansas: You should probably hire a mediator. Not nearly as expensive as two separate lawyers and if everything is agreed to you’ll probably only need one session. Then the mediator can formalize your documents and direct you on how to dot all your is and cross all your ts.
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The procedure varies by state. But you should always be able to file without a lawyer. Your judge may assign you to a mediator (free!) just to make sure all the forms are filled out correctly. But if you agree on everything, this step should just be a formality.
let me know if you ever need someone to talk to, it's such a lonely experience!
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