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@missybear: Are you only using OPKs to track O? Or are you also charting your BBT?

Like @littlek says though it doesn't really matter at this point lol! What's done is done.

Good luck tonight! I think you will feel so much better once you tell him. I'm sure he will be thrilled! Just remember that you have had a couple more days to adjust to the news than he has - if he's a little taken aback, don't be offended. You've gotta remember that moment of panic you had when you got the first positive test - he gets to have that too!

Hope it went well, @missybear !! I think it definitely takes men longer to process, particularly if it wasn't planned or happened sooner than they were expecting. I hope he was super excited, but try not to be sad if he wasn't as excited as you were straight away. He will need some time to process Big hugs!

@missybear: I can't believe you still haven't told him. Maybe you should bring him lunch or something. I could never hold onto this information for this long. I would explode!

@junebugmama: I agree. I couldn't imagine keeping it longer than like 5 seconds! (and I didn't lol )
I'd make a point to tell him asap. Set an alarm or something.

Imagine that FRERs weren't a thing and that you went to the doctor's to get some tests done, they called and told your husband that you're pregnant, and he proceeded to not tell you for several days because your schedules didn't match up. At some point that's going to become a bigger deal than the unplanned pregnancy - just bite the bullet, text and ask him to wake you when he gets home or something. Or just call him - my DH would rather find out over the phone than have me keep it a secret for days.

@missybear: as an accountant in the midst of busy season, I just wanted to send a hug and say that I understand why you haven't told him. You know your husband best and I'm sure you'll tell him when it's a good time.

Hellobee is a pretty supportive community from what I've seen and I hope you'll stay around and share your pregnancy with us!

Set an alarm or ask him to wake you up when he gets home!

You said you didn't imagine becoming parents "this young." Just out of curiosity, how young are you? Can't be that young if he's a practicing accountant, right?

It's a life change no matter what... Imagine if he was diagnosed with some severe illness or condition that would change things and he didn't tell you? Kinda the same situation... I don't know if I would wait any longer personally. I wouldn't be able to keep it to myself in the first place but I think DH would be upset if I had been keeping it a secret!

I've always figured that if I got a BFP and DH was working (he often gets home between midnight-5 a.m.), I'd leave him a note (because we often communicate that way) that there was something in the oven for him.

Put the pee stick in there with a bun and see if he gets it. (bun in the oven)

Then you're probably guaranteed he'd wake you up to talk to him.

@swedishfish: I agree. I also think people are more just answering the question. It's hard because the answer isn't what the OP probably wants to hear - but besides being a really supportive group, we are also a really brutally honest group. I think it's @Adira who jokes that every time she posts a question asking if something is rude, people always tell her she's wrong. You can be supportive, but still disagree with how someone is handling something. Sorry to kind of rant, but I had noticed a few people make the supportive comment and thought it was important to note that all of the people giving the answer of "you need to tell him now" are still taking time to answer and are offering their support through advice (which was asked for). If we weren't supportive, we would just ignore the question. Moreover, they are saying how they would feel in the scenario. Every marriage is different.

ETA: Wrote this prior to seeing your updated post. Didn't want to change it as I stand by my comments, but wanted to provide that context.

@missybear: Ages and ages ago when DH and I were engaged I was unexpectedly pregnant (on BCP), so I've been trying to think of a way to answer your original question. Now-DH was, like your husband, very busy and worked late + weekends and I was really involved in my work too so we hardly saw each other. But I told him right away, almost as soon as the pee stick dried because I was so freaked out and didn't know what to do. It was a big deal - he came home and looked at the line on the stick with me. I was glad we had that freaked out moment together because when I had a m/c he was too busy to come to the ER with me.

What everyone has been trying to tell you is that this is more important than his work and you need to have that moment. He deserves to go through this with you. And even if the responses were not what you were hoping for, trust me it's nothing like what you would have gotten from The Bump.

@missybear: I'm sorry some of these responses are more judgemental than helpful to you. Everyone needs to process and handle things in their own way. I understand your wanting to approach it the right way for you and your husband. Pregnancy can be a huge mental adjustment.

@missybear: I don't think anyone is trying to be snarky. Sometimes when you ask a question, you may not be thrilled with the responses you get, that's the unfortunate thing about making a personal issue public. Good luck telling your husband. My husband was in big 4 and so was I, so I undersand being busy. Hopefully he comes home early so you can discuss.

@missybear: I don't think people mean to be unsupportive, I think people are just answering the question you asked honestly, from their own perspectives. While it seems like the consensus would tell their husbands about the pregnancies ASAP no matter what the circumstances, there are others here who have said they'd wait, as you're doing.

I think it's just hard for people to put themselves in your shoes, maybe?

For me I know that I'd tell my husband as soon as humanly possible because I wouldn't be able to keep such a huge secret and because if he found out I had known for a few days without telling him he would be sad and offended.

I think what people are saying is you do have (and have had) the opportunity to tell him before now, but it seems like you're waiting for the perfect time. Just be aware that there may not be a "perfect" time!

@missybear: I think that the tone of your original post made it seem like you might not even tell your husband you got pregnant in the event that "something happens" before AF. That is the comment to which I imagine most people are reacting. Its not as if you were talking about holding off on telling him until you had time to make a cute announcement onsie. In any event, tell him when its convenient to both of you. Or don't tell him at all. Good luck either way!

@Missybear: I think you're doing a good thing by waiting for the opportune moment when you actually have time to talk. We weren't expecting to be pregnant (NTNP) so soon, and when I found out in a call from my doctors office (went in for blood work for something else completely) during the work day, I immediately called my husband. we were both at work, and it was a stupid, awkward conversation. Looking back, I really wish I had waited at least until we were both at home, with time to talk and really process what was happening for us. So good for you, and good luck in your conversation with your husband!