Hellobee Boards

If their childcare plans fell through, how can anyone blame them??

What a couple of assholes the bride and groom are... If you're going to put restrictions on your wedding guests, you need to be understanding if something doesn't work out.

The parents had 2 options (last minute options):

1. Attend the wedding with the children and go against the bride & grooms wishes. Pissing off the wedding party; or

2. Respect the rules made by the bride and groom and have to stay home. (and apparently piss off the bride & groom anyway!)

Not cool of the bride and groom, IMO.

We allowed kids at our wedding, knowing a few of them were not the best behaved. Oddly all the kids we were worried about were left with sitters by their parents. Had we been child free I hope the guest would have called someone in the wedding party to check if bringing the little one was ok.

We had people just no show. Really annoying but that's just what happens with a big party. In retrospect I would have just under counted by about 5 people and we would have been fine. Granted I knew our chef was making a few extra plates for random extras or people who suddenly didn't want beef or chicken.

And you don't get to charge for no shows. It sucks but is what it is.

I would want them to do whatever was best for them.
We had our wedding in the middle of winter and honestly, even if there was blizzard we would've wanted our guests to be happy and safe.
And we still would've had our wedding, no matter who was able to attend and regardless of what was spent.

I'm pretty sure that friendship is over. Wow.

That is crazy pants. We had a couple no shows that were friends of my parents. We also had friends that showed up and then immediately had to leave due to someone losing their keys and they and didn't come back. It was annoying because the guest list kept getting bigger but we were at capacity for the room.

It happens with a wedding. It's frustrating but it's not a contract.

i think the guests should have called or texted to explain on the day why they weren't coming. Regardless i don;t agree with an invoice!

Wow that is just absurd. The guests should have called or texted to apologize for the no show due to their childcare situation, but even if they didn't, an invoice is ridiculous.

I wonder why one of the parents didn't show up to the wedding alone? If it were my friend getting married, I would have gone to the wedding solo.

@sunny: That's a good idea to have at least on of the parents go!

I don't think people should expect others to pay for their party/wedding. Don't invite that many people if you can't afford it. It should be about your marriage and celebrating with loved ones. Not how much money you're going to make or be out. I get there is an assumption that people will cover their plate but if people don't or can't afford it - would you rather them not celebrate your love with you? What does that make the day about then? Did she invoice the remainder of the cost for those that may not have gifted enough to cover their plate?

@erinbaderin: that's a lame excuse

@yoursilverlining: well said.

It sounds to me the couple is dwelling on the wrong things here. What was important is that they got married and they got to celebrate it.

No shows are rude but they're a given! It happens!

But, I've never experienced anyone not showing up without any sort of last minute notice/apology (birthday, wedding, shower). They've always still gifted us and in essence paid for the meal/activity. But, even if they didn't, I'd just quietly be annoyed and that'd be the end of it. To send an actual invoice is ridiculous!

The newlyweds should have let it go. Stuff happens, sometimes people think they can make it but something trips them up at the last minute. They should have focused on the joy of the day... now both parties involved have this incident leaving a bad taste in their mouth.

@yoursilverlining: Exactly. As my DH said when I told him about this story, apparently the couple decided the friendship was worth less than $75, so why did they even invite them in the first place?

I think this is insane. Yes, no-showing is rude, but I don't really agree with upping the ante and responding to rudeness with more rudeness. I also think, when you host an event, you have to assume there will be a couple no-shows and get over it. We had one no-show at our wedding. She turned out to have a totally valid reason, but regardless, it didn't impact the day in the slightest. We were getting married! We had happier things on our minds

@Mrs. Lemon-Lime: I sent a gift a few weeks before the wedding.

Very rude, should contact couple or venue to alert them, but the dinner has already been paid for so what's the point of sending a bill except to shame people? So tacky. That guest was better off not going.

I see it from both sides and I think both are in the wrong.

Obviously it was not right to send the invoice but I really think the no show guests could have handled it better- just one of them go or send an apologetic card and generous gift.

I still remember the no shows for my wedding. It's not just the money, although that was a significant amount. It's about not caring about one of the most important days of my life. My uncle and my cousin's husband just simply didn't go. The cousin's husband I had ordered a special meal for because he is vegan. I will never make an effort with those people again, I say hello and am polite but that's it. The non family members I don't care about as much.