DD is 13.5 months old and about two weeks ago, began some tantrum throwing like behavior! I thought tantrums didn't start until 2 and was not quite sure how to deal with it. She's old enough to understand most of what I say but I don't think she understands discipline yet (does she?). She throws her head back, grunts and cries (no tears), and makes it impossible to pick her up. What works is if I just try to calmly talk to we, asking her what she wants and letting her work it out. I don't give in and give her what she is upset about since I don't want to encourage her behavior and she usually forgets about it if I redirect we attention to something else.
Anyone else experience this have any tips on how to diffuse calmly without giving in? Apparently DH was a stubborn kid and threw many tantrums too. My mom said I never threw a tantrum since 'I knew better' aka I was too scared of her lol.
I think he learned it from his big sister. It helps me to remember that tantrums before the age of 2 are often directly related to frustration at the inability to communicate. So when DS starts tantruming, I try to help him put words to his feelings and acknowledge why he's feeling that way (e.g. "I see you're feeling upset because your sister is playing with the ball and you want it"), then we redirect ("Your sister has the red ball right now, but you can have the blue ball"). I've also found that signing key words like frustrated and ball help, because DS is able to sign them back, even if he can't vocalize them yet, and that eases the frustration of emerging communication skills a little bit. Also, I don't know about other parents, but we don't ever really discipline ( in terms of time outs or something) DD for tantrums, even now that she's almost three. I just haven't found discipline (beyond removing her from the situation and giving her time/space to calm down) very effective.
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