Hellobee Boards

You can't put a price on time and memories. Spiffy toys and a more expensive house don't really matter if it means that your DH is going to be missing out on big chunks of your LO's life. That time in your LO's life only comes around once and I think it's more likely that someday down the road, you would think "I really wish DH had been around for LO's first this, or first that", but I sincerely doubt you'll ever think "gee, I wish we'd been able to buy LO a bigger collection of toys or the fanciest new gadget to keep up with the Joneses".

I may be wrong, but I think Sweden is pretty similar to Australia and we're in a similar boat. We know we'll ultimately move to the US or UK as we're just too far from our families (one side in each of the aforementioned countries) but we kind of hate the thought of giving up our great quality of life here. The thought of paying for health care, DH having to work much longer hours, and the abysmal annual leave most American companies give, makes our stomachs turn. The UK would be wonderful but the economy is still shite so it would probably have to be the US.

I don't know, it's a decision that is of course up to you and your DH, but if it were me, I'd stay put! Money is not everything and if you're comfortable enough to get by, which it sounds like you are, then that's all one really needs.

My husband and i spoke about this when he was finishing up law school... If he went into a large corporate firm, he would be working crazy hours, but making a lot of money. As he went back to school later in life, he/we realized quality of life was much more important than killing yourself and working 90+ hours a week. Same goes for me. I work in advertising and the hours can be tough, but I have been trying to re-position myself so that I can be home more.... Especially with our baby due in 3 weeks!

Ps - Would looooove to visit Sweden some day!

Id want to live close to home no matter what. For me its not about the money or house, I just wouldn't be happy so far away from my family.

I know exactly what you mean.

People think we're crazy for choosing to be career aid workers - our salary comes out to less than 20k a year (of course we have benefits, but still).

But for us it means raising our children abroad, exposing them to many cultures and languages, teaching them from a young age to help people, and making a real impact on the world.

If we stayed in America and finished some more education (meaning I'd be a midwife and DH would probably teach university), we would probably make 150k a year versus our current 17k.

But as huge as that difference is, the trade-off just isn't worth it for us.

Also - some of the benefits of our current job are HUGE for us. Our kid's college tuition will be 90% covered, and continuing education for us is also covered. That's a big thing.

@hellobeeboston: DH and I spoke about this when I finished law school as well. I had no desire to live the "firm life" and spend 80+ hours a week at the office and constantly have to check emails from home. I went the more non-traditional route and even though my salary is about 1/2 as much as I'd make at a firm, I wouldn't change a thing. I work 40/hrs max a week, never on the weekends, and I don't even know how to check my work email from home. Best decision I ever made!

I guess I would have to know more about the money differential. Would it just be that you could have some nicer toys, or would it be that you could better provide for your and your children's future (college savings, retirement plans, etc). If the money would make a big difference not only to your current situation but also for your future... that's something to really consider. Also, I live a 2 hour plane ride away from my parents and extended family and that's hard enough for me. I don't think I could move to another country unless I knew it was for a set limited period.

I dunno, I have lived and worked in the US and abroad, and I can personally say for ME, my life is a lot better abroad. I made a lot more, even though the cost of living is higher. I also was able to file for overtime, which wasn't possible in the US. I had better unemployment benefits (18 months at 70% pay (18 months at 80% if I had a child) if I had worked for just one year)), my son gets free monthly visits at a parent consulting service until he turns 5 for things like feeding questions, routine illnesses and other support, he also gets a childhood allowance monthly until he's finished with school.

Yes, the downside is that I don't have my family nearby, but things are a lot less stressful than they would be in the US.

Quality of life definitely is more important for us. I make very little money, but I have the most kind, flexible work place. They work with your schedule so you can be home when your kid gets home, and are paying for my grad school!

I would SO go overseas, though, if I had the chance!!!! I'd love to be in a more family-friendly country