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I am NOT a morning person and LO has been waking up really early while we've been visiting my family for Christmas. I usually avoid screen time in the morning because I feel like it affects her behavior the rest of the day, but I totally have been laying in bed while she watches a show on the iPad this trip.
LO wakes up at 7:30 at the earliest when we are home, but it is often 8 or later. If she woke up early all the time, I don't know how I would handle it. It would be hard! So I sympathize with your husband, but I also totally understand where you are coming from!
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It wouldn't bother me. As long as he's learning something substantial from the hour of screen time, and not getting into trouble, I would consider it time well spent. Plus like PP have said, I'd be super happy that I'm not the one awake/half awake monitoring him.
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@hilsy85 I don't SAH, if I did they'd probably get more but since I pay for a nanny, I figure she can earn her $$$ and entertain my kids, haha. Also, that's what we aim for but it certainly isn't always a reality! For example, we are traveling right now and my kids have watched Frozen 8 times in the last four days!
I hope you can come to a solution you feel happy with! -
Okay I didn't read evvvvery thing, but I wanted to comment on the sleep. I think even night owls/high sleep needs/etc can change if needed. I am a HIGH sleep needs person, not a morning person AT all. Like growing up and pre-kids if you woke me up before 10am on a weekend you would be risking your life! However, with my profession and now being a parent, I've had to function on very little sleep, wake up in the MOTN and function, and get up far earlier than I ever wanted to start my day (0600) every. day. of the week. Over the past 5+ years I have shifted to going to bed earlier than I ever would have, and being able to feel rested enough when I get up at 0600. I am a rock star at going right back to sleep, which has been a learned skill. Granted, not all of this is true all of the time, and I often still feel exhausted (except LO is finally STTN at almost 15 mo! hurray!) but it works. Neither DH or I are morning people and we both like to stay up late. But someone had to give and that ended up being me due to BF and work. I don't think people should get a "get out of jail free" card just because they are a night owl. You do what you have to do. It's a partnership. If you moved time zones you would adapt. You're now in time zone baby! Make it work! Haha.
ETA: On weekends I usually spend that gap hour from 6-7am until DH gets up by sitting in the chair half away while LO plays by herself and I occasionally read her a book or tell her she is super awesome for making a great pile of blankets. It's pretty low energy but works without screentime! I would be upset if DH let me sleep in but used the TV to babysit.
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It doesn't bother me. I have to trust his parenting and what he thinks is best when I'm not around. I'm not super strict on screen time though. There are some days they don't get any, and others (like the weekend) when they have the iPad in the morning and a movie at night.
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@hilsy85: I think if it were me my focus would be on figuring out how to get LO to play independently.
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I haven't read the responses, but my DH definitely uses more screen time than me overall. Sometimes it bothers me, but if it means he gets the kids in the morning and I don't have to rush out of bed or I can take a leisurely shower ... then I just let it go. I don't let them have a lot of screen time so I know it's not being overdone the rest of the day.
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@plantains: this is really the key I think!!! Since DD was born, I think L is just so used to one of us being willing to play with him so he didn't feel resentful, and now he just expects it .
@daniellemybelle: if he were a later riser, this would be a non-issue...just our luck that we have an early bird kid
@Glitter: I mean, it's not like it's super educational tv--it's usually Thomas or bob the builder (gag). But not harmful tv either.
Thanks for all the responses!! I think I am going to 1) try to let it go a little bit, and 2) try to get up with DS some mornings, which will mean going to bed earlier, but that is good for me. And hopefully will help DH be more rested for the days he does get up with him. He woke up with him today, and there was no screen time at all. DS woke up later than usual, at 7, which kind of tells me that it really is the hour of the day that is hard for DH and not just that he is being lazy.
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It would annoy me not because of screen time but because DH thinks he is helping, and then makes light of when I watch our son, he does this a lot.
Our morning solution is a clock that changes colors. No color-go back to sleep, orange-play but don't wake mommy, green- come get me. It took some adjusting but now he usually will play with trains in his room till it is "real" wake up time. -
being in the throughs of it with you, i was thinking about this for a bit. i definitely put on a show and set R up with yogurt this morning to get more sleep with S, but i would be frustrated with myself or with DH if we were doing this every morning. i went to bed too late and guess what, the baby woke up 3 times and R wakes up every morning at the same time, so that's just part of being a parent to our kids. it's the season of life we're in and yeah, i do expect that DH is going to be on board to parent along with me, even when we don't feel like it, because there are many days where i just don't feel like being an adult/parent!
that being said, i would have the convo with DH about what we could do together to make it not an every morning thing/what else he could be doing to serve you/L for that hour in the AM and make your day easier even with the use of TV/him getting more sleep too. then once you have that convo, it's a matter of letting go for a while. you guys are in the trenches, so give yourselves a little grace!
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