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Would you cancel in this situation?

  1. Mrs. Lemon-Lime

    wonderful pea / 17279 posts

    Yep, I would have cancelled with a baby the young at home. If I’m being honest I would cancel just not to rush it for myself or DH. Being sick sucks. With my friend group germs would definitely spread. we hug and kiss and usually split an appetizer. Millionaire’s Bacon 🥓

  2. JLC53

    cherry / 175 posts

    Me personally, I would not have cancelled. I don't put myself in a bubble when people are sick. I also wouldn't hold it against the person that cancels. I understand your frustration though. I have a friend that has cancelled several times on me days in advance because she is sick. I am like, really, we don't have plans for 5 more days, why cancel now...?? It always leaves me disappointed, so I understand where you are coming from. I will never hold it against my friend though and will always reschedule even when I am disappointed.

  3. psw27

    pomelo / 5220 posts

    I would not have cancelled but I am also not super germ-phobic. I have 2 kids at home, live in a major city, take public transport and Ubers. Germs are everywhere. All I can do is wash my hands, hand sanitize and hope for the best. I can't live in a vacuum.

    I would be disappointed but I wouldn't be upset with her either. Everyone has to make their own choices.

  4. youboots

    honeydew / 7622 posts

    I would not have cancelled since I am exposed to germs constantly and never know who has someone sick at home that you are in close contact with- like getting a manicure, massage or haircut. It’s hard to pick and choose what is an ok amount of risk/exposure but unless I’m pre screening everyone aggressively or not going out at all I would not cancel on a friend just because I happen to have more information. But I respect others choices to be in a situation/environment they are comfortable in.

  5. Nutella

    persimmon / 1045 posts

    Last winter when LO was a newborn I did this to a friend with a sick toddler. My friend said her kid had been having an upset stomach for days & I didn’t think twice about rescheduling even though I knew there would have been no physical contact. I have a preschooler who brought back full on bugs which resulted in baby getting a nasty upper respiratory tract infection & it was heartbreaking. It sounds funny but I did not even think my friend would be angry, but I did have the thought that I did not care either (hormones?!) because I was purely in protective mode! Eventually caught up a month later when all the bugs were gone.

  6. cake2017

    persimmon / 1079 posts

    Yes, I would have canceled! I hope you can reschedule!

  7. Modern Daisy

    grapefruit / 4187 posts

    I just canceled on my friend for the exact same reason, so yes I absolutely would have. While it is a little safer at a restaurant without your kids present it’s just not worth the risk ultimately. The stomach bug is super contagious and we’ve gotten hit hard with it two years ina row now. Just when you think it hasn’t spread bam you’re throwing up. Hand sanitizer and Clorox wipes are completely ineffective and we even took the extra step of keeping our boys totally separate and it did nothing. This year we contracted it from my friend who had been symptom free for 3 days so everyone thought it would be fine. Now if someone gives me a heads up that their kids have the flu or stomach bug I take the initiative and reschedule any plans.

  8. oldsoulmama

    coffee bean / 27 posts

    @aprild: I know it’s upsetting, but I’m with her, I would have cancelled. It is not unusual for the virus to transfer after days of no infection so I think she is doing the right thing, especially if she has little ones at home. If your son had norovirus, that one is crazy contagious and very difficult to get rid of. Having been infected in the past and caring for 2 young children, one of whom was also vomiting, was awful and I will avoid it as much as I can. It was so bad that it made me a germophobe. This makes us hermits during the winter but I’d rather be this way than be that sick again. I’m sorry, I can imagine how disappointing it is but I credit her for being honest with you rather than coming up with some lame excuse.

  9. meganmp

    persimmon / 1420 posts

    I would not have cancelled, and if I am being honest I would have been annoyed at someone who cancelled on me since it is hard for me to schedule time with my friends, and cancelling negates all of that work. I am also the least germ-a-phobic person ever, so take that with a grain of salt.

  10. 2littlepumpkins

    grapefruit / 4455 posts

    @aprild: despite CONSTANT sanitizing and separating for days my son got my daughters stomach bug over a week later. I don't know if it's the same bug but I am running a fever today despite constant sanitizing hand washing and wearing gloves (we've gone through 100s of pairs)... and now we wait to see if the newborn gets it. I seriously can't deal with vomit for the most part. It brings on bad anxiety. So I don't know if I would have generally cancelled but this week I feel like I would have. 😩 Edit: I think I wouldn't usually cancel but I don't think I could be mad at someone who did.

  11. 2littlepumpkins

    grapefruit / 4455 posts

    @Modern Daisy: yes we had to buy $$$ germicidal spray and wipes and sanitized laundry and dishes and used disposable where possible and my dd only puked twice into a bucket and ds STILL got it.


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