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I am only about half way through my pregnancy and I too am coming to terms with this. I normally eat well and of course had grand plans to finally get rid of the few less than ideal foods that were left in my diet. Then I got hyperemesis and that plan went out the window, I have eaten more junk (stuff I hadn't touched in over a decade) than I care to admit simply because it would stay down.

I also despised being pregnant for the whole first trimester which I never thought would happen since I was so desperate to start our family.

I am sure I am in for many, many more reality checks as time goes on...

I feel like I'm in survival mode 24/7 while pregnant and with two LO's already, I'm just so, so done. Pregnancy is far from what I imagined it would be like before having kids. Parenting is better in some ways than what I imagined and harder in other ways. Of course, the love I have for my children is indescribable and incredible.

Pregnancy was actually better than I expected--- but I sort of expected it to be awful. The 1st tri was worse, but the 2nd and especially 3rd were way better. Labor/delivery were way worse (planned for med free midwife birth, ended up with an induction, epidural, and c-section), recovery has been both better and worse (better in that I'm not sore in my nether region, worse in that half my c-section incision opened up and is causing my issues).

Parenting is harder so far, mostly. The sleep deprivation is what I worried most about and it is what bothers me the least. I did not worry that much about a fussy/crying baby and that is what I find the hardest. I feel like we've just been in survival mode with my recovery and our LO. We love her so much but we're not enjoying this stage really at all. Every night we basically remind each other it will get better and we will survive this incredibly fussy stage and get a happy child.... at some point.

My pregnancy wasn't too different than I expected physically - I would say it was middle of the road. I of course would have loved to have a cute basketball belly but I knew that wasn't going to happen. Emotionally it was different than I thought it would be in good & bad ways. At first I was surprised at how not bonded to the baby I was & how I felt no different than before - I was not more maternal like I thought I would be. And then at the end I surprised myself by bonding to her after months of not feeling a connection at all.

Parenthood has been so different than I have anticipated again in good & bad ways. I did not bond really at all after delivery & that was very surreal - to have your own baby in your arms & to not feel like she was yours at all. But now the love I feel for her is very deep & indescribable. It is much more rewarding to be a mom than I imagined.

I will be honest, the first year was really difficult and what made it kind of hard for me was the fact that I had done a lot to prepare in terms of the gear we bought, but NONE of it helped my son actually sleep or feed as I imagined he would. It was a wake up call for sure when I realized I couldn't just "buy" a piece of gear to solve our issues and I'd have to experiment and rely on my instincts instead.

No one tells you that when you're spending 1000 hours putting your registry together.

Ha! Yeah, pregnancy was nothing like I expected. Nor was L+D, for that matter. Both were much harder and much more frustrating than I expected them to be.

On the other hand, I'm pleasantly surprised by my postpartum experience. My recovery has been mercifully easier than I anticipated, and I'm thrilled that BFing has gone well.

The thing I was 100% least prepared for? That very first MOTN wake up in the hospital. I had been up for almost 48 hours by that point, and I was beat. Trying to figure out how to get her to latch on 2 hours of sleep felt like torture and definitely made me question whether or not I was cut out for this!

Pregnancy was harder and easier then I expected. I loved being pregnant, but I wasn't expecting the sleep issues. I couldn't sleep at all in the 1st tri without taking unisom. Then at the end I couldn't get comfortable at all.

Labor and delivery was a lot easier and faster then I was expecting.

What I thought would happen: I was sure I would get pregnant the first or second month we tried (that has been the case for all my female relatives), but I was terrified that being pregnant would be terrible - that I would feel awful and gain a ton of weight that wouldn't come off after the baby was born. I expected L&D to be hard, but I was convinced I could have the natural, med-free birth I wanted. I was certain that DH and I, who had been together forever, would be great at being parents and would just increase our love by having a baby.

What actually happened: It took us more than a year and surgical intervention to get pregnant. IF really strengthened DH and my bond but it was *rough* on me emotionally. I am honestly not sure I will ever recover. I absolutely loved being pregnant - every single minute of it. I felt and looked great and I bonded with my baby from the beginning. L&D, on the other hand, was a long mess that felt my body in shambles... it took 7+ months and a D&C to get back to "normal" - I still have some lady bits issues that I am not sure will ever be resolved. I loved having a baby and the newborn stage was much better and easier than I expected, but I had to go on a medication after her birth that made me depressed. It took several months for DH and I to figure that out - and my marriage *really* suffered during that time. DH was a great husband and dad, but I was a having a tough time being a good wife. I felt overwhelmed and angry until I went off those soul-sucking meds. We started TTC #2 once our marriage/my mental health was back on track and are on month 8 of TTC #2, so it looks like history is repeating itself.

Pregnancy is nothing like I expected it to be. I expected to be on cloud nine, and that is definitely not the case.

I've had horrible nausea the entire pregnancy. I'm just now (at 24 weeks) able to stop taking my anti-nausea medication and feel ok. I also expected to feel super attached to my LO, and that hasn't been the case. I feel more attached now that I know the sex of the baby, but it isn't what I thought it would be by this point. But I think having a MC is the reason for that.

Overall I know I'm lucky to have a healthy (so far) pregnancy. But I really thought I would love being pregnant and I'm overall pretty 'meh' about it.

@pui: It's so funny - I took BCP religiously for 11+ years, and the whole time I would laugh to DH (way before he was DH) that I was going to be *so* annoyed if it turned out I never needed the BCP. Ha. Joke's on me.

@Mae: I thought the exact same thing as far as a baby! Sleep deprevation doesn't bother me like I thought (and I've been averaging 6 hr broken sleep per night for the past 8.5 months). It's amazing what you get used to. But the fussy, crying baby was nearly my undoing. But you are right. It will and does get WAAAAAAAAAY better.

I was also scared to death of an epidural, but when I had to have the spinal for the c-section, it was easy-peasy. Pushing was much harder. Didn't realize how much of a whole body workout it would be.

I thought I would gain a healthy amount of weight - nope! Gained 62 lbs. I thought I'd have an easy, unmedicated birth - nope! I thought my baby would sleep through the night consistently at around 6 months old, maybe earlier - nope! He was a little fussbucket at night til around 8.5 months.

But, you know? All that being said, it has been totally worth it. My dreams were nowhere as good as the reality. The hard parts make the awesome parts seem even better I'm hoping for a smooth delivery, and an easygoing baby for you! You have certainly paid your dues thus far

@chibee: Hey you!! It feels like you've been pregnant forever!! When are you due - is it August? I hope you're feeling well. xx

I did not expect breastfeeding to hurt for 8 weeks. I also did not expect to start pumping during the first week of my child's life. Now, at 12 weeks, I am shocked that I don't completely DESPISE pumping (still don't love it), and that I am able to breastfeed whenever I want without discomfort. I continue to be surprised at the role that breastfeeding plays in my relationship with my child. The psychology of being the sole food source is interesting and more complicated than I expected.

I expected to be more broken up about going back to work, but only because everyone seems to get broken up about it (as opposed to thinking I personally would be upset, based on my personality).

During my pregnancy, I joked that I knew my child would be a champion sleeper with a sunny disposition. But you know what? HE IS! OMG! It's amazing! He is a smiley baby who only really cries for a reason, not colicky at all, and while he still wakes up to eat in the middle of the night, he goes right back to sleep. I was terrified of having a fussy baby and worried how I would deal with sleep deprivation, and neither of those really turned out to be terrible. I know we are just lucky, and I am very grateful for that. For my son's sake, I hope he manages to hold onto his easy-going nature. I consider it part of my job as a parent to facilitate that!

I also am way less proprietary about my baby than I expected. The day after he was born, I was happy to let my parents hold him in the hospital and did not feel a strong urge to cling to him all day.

This says it all!

Pregnancy wasn't quite what I imagined. Now pregnant with #2 I've been surprised how much worse this pregnancy has been (and I thought the first was hellish for the first 20-weeks). Labor and delivery was somewhat like what I thought, except I imagined there would be no pain with an epidural. Mine wore off quite a bit and I felt way more than I ever imagined while pushing. Parenting hasn't been a huge surprise. I babysat/nannied so I had a good idea what to expect. Breastfeeding was a lot harder/demanding than I imagined!

Pregnancy was as I expected it to be: easy and uneventful for me. But L&D was nothing like what I'd hoped for (wanted an intervention-free birth with my midwife. Instead, went to 42 weeks agreed to induction but ended up as a transfer-of-care to an OB when baby was still too high after Foley catheter, then epidural, then csection), although my csection recovery was easy peasy.

Being a parent, on the other hand, is WAY harder than I expected. It's definitely gotten way easier, probably from 9 months onward, but I was not at all prepared for the breastfeeding pain and challenged, the loss of freedom/independence or just how difficult the sleep deprivation would be. But it has been 100% worth it because I get to be the mother of this sweet, adorable, happy little lady

@MamiMami: haha, that's me! Pregnancy was easy. Labor was easy. Parenting, now... I never knew baby screaming grates so much! I was not prepared for that bit. It's still a struggle to deal with it calmly.

Pregnancy was a horror show third trimester, once I got pre-e I was 60lbs heavier, so swollen I thought my skin would burst.
L&D was different than I expected (no abdominal contractions whatsoever, back labor only - I didn't even know this was possible until it happened to me! and I DID take birth classes. I thought I was having a seizure from the pre-e, lol) but the delivery was way easier - all pressure, no pain when I was actually pushing, he came out, I was stitched up, etc.
Recovery was WAY longer and WAY worse - all those stitches swelled and caused all sorts of complications I had never heard of, granulation tissue, trapped nerves, etc.

Despite the small parenting bumps - breastfeeding, no sleep, etc. - at least I was prepared for that. It's really been AMAZING. He's the baby I've always dreamed of, even better. I'd never been around babies and at times doubted my motherly instinct and with him, it's always been so clear that this is what I've always been meant to do. It's the best!