Hellobee Boards

Be kind to yourself. Newborns spend all day long eating, pooping, and crying... and sleeping in small spurts. They are not really interactive at all. It's easy to convince yourself that you're doing things wrong, but if your baby is healthy, you're probably doing everything just fine. Remind yourself of that daily. ...and and soon as you feel comfortable leaving the house, find a local moms' group to join. Having the company of other new moms is very helpful during the early weeks.

To dress a baby it is easier to put the arms in first, not the legs. It took me a while to figure this out, especially in the early days when you are changing them over and over and over...

Our babies love us and will turn out fine even if we don't buy them the latest baby crap, even if we let them cry for a little while, even if we didn't realize they were sitting in a dirty diaper, even if we have them sleep in a crib, bassinet, the big bed, even if we breastfeed, formula feed, bottle feed, whatever you do, you are Mom (or Dad) and they have to love you.

Don't ever let anyone convince you you're not doing something right because its not their way. Older women especially dish out loads of advice which can come off as super negative.

Remember to laugh and don't be ashamed to ask for help or cry or feel angry. Your emotions are going to be insane after the kid comes out!

In the beginning, just enjoy the times where they just fall asleep in your arms and you don't have to worry about sleep training and nap schedules. Don't worry about forming bad sleep habits because honestly, you need to do whatever it takes for both you and the baby to sleep in the beginning. Sleep when the baby sleeps. That extra hour or so during the day will help immensely.

Talk to your husband about how you want him to be involved/help out before the baby comes. You'll be a lot less emotional, and it's easier to talk about it when you're both not sleep deprived.

These are all great! If your baby won't stop crying no matter what you do try not to let it get you down, it isn't because you are not doing it right, sometimes babies just cry. I would also add take lots of pictures and cherish the snuggles! Sometimes you should put spending time with your baby before household chores because dishes will wait, the floors will still be there to vacuum but babies grow way to fast to worry about everything else all the time.

Sleep when the baby sleeps!!!!

Try to take some time everyday just for you. For me it's taking an hour or so every night to take a bath. I wait until after DS has been fed and is asleep...DH has a bottle if he wakes up hungry.

I think it's really important to have a little bit of alone time to just be you. It's super easy to get lost in a new baby, but I think it's very important not to completely lose yourself.

I am just learning but here's what I've got so far...

Books are just guidelines/books. Sometimes they're right, sometimes they're wrong, sometimes they contradict each other.Do what works for you and your family.

Take things one day at a time. (This is the one I have the most trouble with!)

Don't withdraw! After awhile you may be surprised how much you need adult company.

If you feel depressed or having a lot of anxiety, get help, even if it seems you don't want to, aren't convinced you need to, or don't think you have the time to do that.

Take care of yourself! Even if you have to let the baby cry a little, as long as (s)he is changed, fed, and healthy, it'll be ok. As the Dr. told me, put your own life mask on before assisting others! Babies cry, it doesn't mean you've failed as a mother!

BFing, FFing, EPing, whatever. As long as you feed baby when he or she is hungry it'll be ok!

Be careful about which online threads (HB and elsewhere!) you read. Don't read all about worst case scenarios. Don't develop unrealistic expectations whether good or bad ones. Don't feel the weight of ALL of parenting your child in the first month. (I struggle here!)

Try and get out of the house once a day, even if it's just for a couple of minutes.

Apparently, insomnia is quite common in new moms, even when they are exhausted. I wish I had known this at the outset; I would have felt a little less horrified when it happened to me. If it happens to you and goes on for so long that you're worried, talk to a doctor!

If you want to breastfeed, great! If you have problems and want to work through them to continue to breastfeed, great! But you don't have to. You aren't poisoning your baby or depriving it of magical immunity to disease or something by formula feeding. Just get the kid fed in whatever way works best for your family.

Newborns are cute, but they don't really do much but sleep, eat, look around, and sometimes cry. If that's all your newborn does, it is probably fine.

And, while this may be obvious, I wish I would have heard it more early on: Everything is temporary. If your two month old isn't sleeping well, don't assume you are doomed to 18 years of four hours of broken sleep a night.

The first few weeks are all about survival! Do whatever you need to to make sure everyone in the house is as well fed and rested as they can be. As long as those needs are being met, you're doing fine!

The best piece of advice I received was to trust my instincts and go with my gut. So many times I had a gut feeling about something that I was cautioned away from, and in every case I was right. You know your baby more and better than anyone else in the world.

I agree--trust your gut. Parenting can be so instinctual. Also, it does suck sometimes--you don't need to pretend that everything is rainbows and butterflies all the time. BUT, you will get the hang of it, and it will get SO much better!

Don't buy into mom guilt--if you need some time to yourself it's perfectly okay!

Don't use the " right now" to predict your future. For instance, your baby at four weeks won't be the same baby when/if you head back to work at 12 weeks. You'll both have changed by then, and things will be different.

@jackieomy Good advice!