I am trying to avoid having a complete, albeit temporary, breakdown. I am almost 30 weeks pregnant, desperately trying to meet 3 hard (non-negotiable) deadlines this week, and feeling like I am drowning in the process. I am exhausted, (major trouble sleeping due to heartburn and baby movement), feel nauseous, and am beyond stressed.
I am doing everything possible to keep my workload manageble . . . but my practice group is short handed, and right now there is nowhere else for the work to go. I do realize that this will (largely) resolve itself over the course of this week (and weekend), but right now I am just having a hard time wrapping my brain around *how* it will be possible.
I can't talk to anyone at work about it. My peers are male, and even if they have children, they still don't get how hard being pregnant can be, or how big a toll it can take on your body and your mind . . . and my sole female boss is, well, my boss. (I also couldn't get through it without crying, and in my profession, there is no crying in baseball, so to speak.)
Although I can talk to my DH, he is overloaded at work too, and I feel like he is carrying enough on his shoulders as is. This is a big year (professionally) for him, and I *hate* feeling like all I do is complain about work/pregnancy.
In terms of friends and family, it is so hard to talk about difficulties with pregnancy without sounding ungrateful or like you aren't *happy* - I am sure all of you can relate to that.
So, while I sincerely hope nobody else is currently feeling this way, I guess I am posting this here because I need to tell someone how hard this is and how much I stuggle with keeping it all together and above water . . . and because, well, it's *safe* here.
Family problems are tough - I'm sorry you are going through that. I had no idea how much being pregnant would impact my daily life . . . it feels like the more I try to pull back and create space in my life to breathe, relax, and be present, the more life/work seem(s) to throw at me to fill up that space. I feel like I have done a pretty good job at working my way through any issues, but I get a little panic-y when I feel like I am *slipping.*
I was (and still am to a large degree) feeling overwhelmed with being pregnant and chasing around a toddler and trying to figure out how to make ends meet once we have another baby. It's hard and it's stressful. But I try try try not to let it get to me too much because I don't want the stress hormones affecting my baby if at all possible. Just know that this funk will pass!
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