I wasn't really sure where to put this or how to start. Two years ago when I had my son I had an induction that led to a lot of rough procedures and some birth trauma. Since then I can't stand having other people touch me in exams, especially with their hands. At my last annual exam I had a full on panic attack. I am now pregnant again and plan to have a repeat c-section.

I had my anatomy scan last week and met with a MFM doctor. She's not a part of my practice, she's basically a consultant for them. She wanted to do an internal exam during the anatomy scan and wasn't thrilled when I refused. She told me that if I go into pre-term labor I'll have to get a cervical check, which I told her I don't want. She also seemed very dismissive of my issues. She said something along the lines of "We'd have to do it to know if you're in labor. We'll help you through it."

I was really upset by the whole thing. For one, I have told everyone repeatedly I don't want any exams this pregnancy. And yet, she wanted to do one to check my cervical length and placenta placement, which she managed to do abdominally once I refused the internal check. So the internal check was obviously not necessary in my case, yet there was no treating me like I was an individual person - I was just another patient coming and going, treated like anyone on an assembly line.

I'm also now somewhat worried about pre-term labor. Is it true that I'd have to have a cervical check? Can they not just monitor my contractions to see if they progress?

I know I need to talk to my regular OB about this and I really hope that they are not so dismissive of my feelings. I kind of don't know what to do if she insists they need to check me, regardless of my feelings. I'm 21 weeks and I'd hate to try to go finding another provider that will be more sympathetic to my issues.

Has anyone dealt with this kind of trauma? Or any advice on cervical checks in pre-term labor?