This is a horrible post to write...
Yesterday an 18 month old girl drowned at daycare. The latest I've heard is that they got her heart beating but there is no brain activity.
Our in-home daycare provider had an above-ground pool and kept the ladder out so no kids could get in. Her adult kids used it this weekend and left the ladder out. She and the 6 kids walked from the house to the garden to pick peas when she noticed the little girl was missing, and found her face-down in the pool, She did CPR until the ambulance arrived but couldn't get her to breathe.
She is obviously distraught over this (as am I) and may not continue to offer daycare. We loved her, my 8 month old son loves her, as well as all of the kids, she has been in daycare for 20+ years and I have never heard anything bad about her. She loves all of the kids as well.
I hate the idea of finding a new sitter when we love her so much. To continue with her (assuming this is an option) I would NEED the pool to be gone but I think I would feel comfortable doing so as this was an accident. We are also considering a center but may not be able to get in at this point, or a new in-home daycare run by a mom of 3.
What would you do?
admin / wonderful grape / 20724 posts
@josina: Oh my goodness, my heart goes out to the little girl and her family!!
I would find a new daycare provider. Do you know if she was licensed by the state?
wonderful pomelo / 30692 posts
If you feel comfortable continuing to use her IF she removes the pool, I think you should go ahead and do that. You can be pretty sure she's going to be HYPER VIGILANT about the safety of all the children in the future after this accident!
If she doesn't remove the pool, I would find a new daycare. I don't know much about home providers, but daycare centers generally are pretty regulated and have random inspections for safety, which makes me feel a lot more comfortable!
ETA: I've changed my mind after reading some of the other responses. Even if she gets rid of the pool, I think this incident will mess up her ability to watch children. Either she'll be dealing with legal issues or she'll just be too paranoid to let them do anything at all. I'd find another daycare.
kiwi / 661 posts
so awful. I don't know that I'd be able to move past that... I would need to find a new childcare provider.
nectarine / 2173 posts
I think it would be too depressing. Plus even without the pool how did the LO go missing? Sounds like not enough supervision for that age.
eggplant / 11287 posts
That is so tragic.
I think I would find a new daycare provider. Leaving the ladder out tells me that maybe she doesn't pay enough attention to detail, so I would feel more comfortable placing my child elsewhere. That's just too big of a mistake to ignore.
GOLD / wonderful olive / 19030 posts
Being a mom of kids who go to an in home this is something that I would battle with completely. First off I'm in no way blaming your daycare provider, I know accidents happen, however I think after every weekend/use it should have been habit to remove that ladder with young kids. Kids are curious, there's no way to combat that but we have to do everything we can to make sure that curiosity doesn't end in tragedy.
For me, the pool gone would be the minimum that would need to be done but this would have to be 100% (I would be shocked if she would leave it even without continuing daycare, it would be an awful reminder to her and her family.) Second I would need reassurance from the state that the license is not being affected and she will still be continuing forward with regular state checks. But I'm still torn because this is a preventable accident.
olive / 50 posts
That is devastating. Personally, I don't think I could send my child back because I don't think I could ever fully trust the provider again.
But I think you have to go with your gut on this one - I think this is a situation that is really easy to judge from an outside perspective.
kiwi / 649 posts
That is so heartbreaking
I don't think she will ever be the same (especially emotionally) again, therefore I would definitely start looking for new a new daycare.
honeydew / 7303 posts
I would find a new daycare. I don't understand how an 18 month old would go missing while at daycare and end up in a pool. I wouldn't want my kid out of site for a second much less however long it takes to get into a pool
grapefruit / 4800 posts
Find a new center. Even if you get over the drowning the lady will be going through immense grief and legal battles. I can't imagine staying focused through that kind of grief. Pass along a note of kindness but find a new daycare.
grapefruit / 4321 posts
@mrbee: I can't imagine any state would issue a daycare license with a pool on the property.
I would not be willing to go back to this day care under any circumstances. There should never have been a chance for the provider to not have her eye on the girl long enough for her to climb the ladder, get in the pool, and drown. Honestly, I'm doubtful you'll have the opportunity anyway as I would assume the teacher will be charged for some sort of criminal negligence.
pear / 1531 posts
@Maysprout: Good point. I doubt she would be in any state to watch children for quite sometime. I also wouldn't be surprised if she became embroiled in legal action by the parents.
Is she watching all 6 kids at once? That is a lot.
blogger / eggplant / 11551 posts
This is so tragic and heartbreaking.
I would definitely find a new daycare for all the reasons pp have mentioned. Even without a ladder, any kid could have fallen right into the pool. She didn't have a gate? That terrifies me. A 1:6 ratio sounds like a lot, especially with a pool around.
grapefruit / 4663 posts
I'm on the opposite side, it is a tragic accident. We love our inhome too much to leave and she also has an above ground pool. Unless I felt that it was caused by lack of supervision I'd continue to use her.
GOLD / wonderful coconut / 33402 posts
I would not go back at all. She missed that the ladder was out, what other safety concerns are being missed? Either way the provider wasn't watching the girl that closely that she was able to walk away, climb a ladder, and fall in, all before she knew she was missing.
that poor little girl and family.
cantaloupe / 6869 posts
nectarine / 2821 posts
@travelingnanny: That's why I was thinking as well. She will probably never forgive herself.
bananas / 9227 posts
How horrible I would look for a new daycare because I'd be worried about her mental state. It sounds like a horrible accident ... I find it close to impossible to be able to continue business as normal after it. For that reason, I'd find somewhere new and fresh and maybe keep in touch with her if you're close.
hostess / wonderful watermelon / 39513 posts
I would not go back at all. It seems like a huge thing to miss when you are running a daycare.
papaya / 10343 posts
Gah what a tragedy. It's awful but I feel like these sorts of oversights/accidents do happen even when someone is responsible. That being said, I personally feel that 6 is way too many kids for her to keep track of. I would have felt that way before the pool incident but certainly after (I pretty much want eyeballs on my child every minute of the day unless she is in a crib). If you feel that she is a responsible caregiver and still want to use her, and she got rid of the pool, and she lowered her attendance to 3 or 4 children max... I would probably continue to go to her. But I feel like there is just no way to keep an eye on 6 children at the same time and kids are going to find a way to hurt themselves (seriously or not) if they aren't being watched.
GOLD / watermelon / 14076 posts
I would be shocked if this woman does not lose her license (assuming she was licensed in the first place).
Regardless, you could not pay me to go back there. I'm sure she feels terrible and will probably need a lot of therapy, but I need to feel like my child is safe when she's at daycare and there's no way I'd feel comfortable sending my LO back under those circumstances.
grapefruit / 4988 posts
This is so sad. I would definitely start looking for a new daycare. I'm trying to imagine the amount of time it would take for an 18 month old to get leave the group, find the ladder, and climb all the way up it. That is not something that happens because you just turn around for a second. This woman is going to be charged with something and I can't imagine someone dealing with legal battles that plus her own grief and guilt watching my child.
grapefruit / 4321 posts
@jetsa: I'm confused what else this could have been caused by. If the child was properly supervised, this wouldn't have happened.
pomelo / 5298 posts
@josina: Is she licensed by the state? I would guess this could significantly impact her license and her insurance. I would assume that she will be forced "out of business" either by the state or the cost of her insurance.
I've never used an in home provider so there is some bias in my next comment. I would probably give the center you have in mind a call, explain the situation you are in and see what their openings look like. Get the facts on the center before you assume you can't get a spot. It will give you more information to make your decision.
Given the facts you shared in our monthly thread about the other in home provider, I probably wouldn't be comfortable there either.
papaya / 10560 posts
Pretty sure if she was even licensed she will no longer have one. What a terrible tragedy.
eggplant / 11287 posts
@Truth Bombs: My MIL has been a licensed provider for over 30 years and she has a hot tub in her backyard. Not sure if that is different than a pool, though.
pomegranate / 3966 posts
@mrbee: She was not licensed or registered, and after a search there is only 13 that are in our county, about 5 in the area. And after reading the reports on the center I would use, not so thrilled about them either...
@sapphire: @yellowbird: She apparently just wandered off between the house and garden which are NOT far apart, I guess it just happened so fast!
@Mrs. High Heels: Its an above-ground pool so the kids couldn't just fall in, and even the older kids wouldn't have been able to move the ladder. Not that I ever liked it... No pool will be a requirement from here out for sure.
Agreed to all who mentioned emotional distress, which she said herself she wasn't sure if she'd be able to continue, and then I'm sure there will be legal issues as well. The whole thing is just so sad.
I guess I'm also thinking if we did stay with her she would most likely be losing some other children, so could be a better ratio than some of the other in-home centers.
In Iowa she is allowed to have 8 children max, with 4 under 2, and 3 under 18 months, which I believe she was within. The girl and her older brother had just started 2 weeks ago.
I may need some time to just remove myself from the situation. I think I feel so bad for her that maybe I'm letting that get in the way of my decision-making. At the same time how can I trust any other place I bring him to?!
cantaloupe / 6885 posts
This is basically my worst nightmare. So, so sad for everyone all around.
There is absolutely no way I could send my child back. She's probably a lovely lady, but that is a HUGE oversight and a definite lack of supervision. It's more than an accident. 6 children is A LOT for one person to watch, especially with toddlers under the age of 2 thrown into the mix.
I would be looking for a licensed centre ASAP. So sorry you are going through this
pomegranate / 3401 posts
I don't think I could go back after a tragedy like this!! I would constantly be worried....
pomegranate / 3966 posts
@MamaG: Definetly not comfortable with my back-up who has the pool, looking into a different in-home that is just starting, she is a mom with 3 of her own kids but have a lot more research to do on her as well.
I read the report on the licensed center that is available and it was not so good either... Ugh this sucks.
wonderful pomelo / 30692 posts
@josina: I would definitely try to find a licensed daycare provider. I was reading up on the rules with pools and she wasn't following them:
"When there is a swimming or wading pool on the premises:
(1) A wading pool shall be drained daily and shall be inaccessible to children when it is not in use.
(2) An aboveground or in-ground swimming pool that is not fenced shall be covered whenever the pool is not in use. The cover shall meet or exceed the standards of the American Society for Testing and Materials.
(3) An uncovered aboveground swimming pool shall be enclosed with an approved fence that is four feet above the side walls."
Honestly, I'd look into a center if I were you. Or at least some place that has two teachers at all times who can double-check what the other is doing.
hostess / wonderful persimmon / 25556 posts
Oh my God. That is horrible. She will probably lose her license to be a daycare provider so I would start looking now.
wonderful pear / 26210 posts
I would leave immediately and never look back.
pomelo / 5298 posts
@josina: Regarding the report on the center. I'm not sure what information your state department releases, but I'd try to understand the issues. I know the center we use has been documented several times for not having current feeding schedules for infants. Our state requires feeding schedules to be updated (confirmed by signature of the parent) every 30 days. They have struggled to get parents to sign them every 30 days. But I have the ongoing conversation with the teacher about what we are doing at home and what I'm comfortable with them trying. So to ME, that documented failure just isn't a big deal. There are other items that would be a big deal to me.
My girl was fed the wrong bottle several months ago. How they handled it was very important to me and the new procedures they introduced as a result.
Also, keep in mind that centers are inspected frequently - often unannounced. They are bound to have some minor failures. Home providers without a license can't be compared because they are never inspected.
watermelon / 14467 posts
This is such a horrible tragedy. I would start looking for other providers and would definitely want there to be more than one teacher/provider.
apricot / 343 posts
This is horrific - The poor family This is something I would not be able to get past, so I would not think twice about getting a new daycare provider.
GOLD / wonderful pea / 17697 posts
I just couldn't go back. I would find somewhere new.
grapefruit / 4418 posts
Pool or no pool we would not return. This is so sad and the reason why I refuse to send my child to home daycare that has a pool onsite. I know things can happen quickly, but with adequate supervision, this never would have happened.
pomegranate / 3966 posts
@MamaG: the center report stated that several parents reported infants being covered with a blanket on their head to try and get them to stop crying! Everyone denied it and it doesn't say who exactly said it, nor was it witnessed but yikes? They also had violations for non-infants being in the infant room, cell-phone usage, and a 2 year old getting left in the outside area! The 2 yr+ part of the center is not licensed and both are located in a catholic elementary school.
Maybe a disgruntled employee made the blanket comment? They were implementing steps to fix the cell phone usage and the child getting left.