DH and I are planning to start TTC when we return from a trip in May. We have discussed our timeline in length, but have always been pretty "wishy washy" when other people ask us when we're going to start trying. We'd say things like "we're both so busy right now...." etc, just to leave it pretty open-ended.
So imagine my surprise when we were out to dinner with a group of friends to celebrate my 30th birthday and all of a sudden the guy sitting next to my DH yells out "You guys are going to start trying for a baby in May?!?!" All other conversation at the table comes to a screeching halt (you could almost hear the record scratch) and all eyes are immediately on me.
I lock eyes with DH and don't say a word but turn bright red. He says "What? Was that a secret?" and I said "Well, I guess it isn't anymore!" Then to lighten the mood, I added, "You better have good swimmers because now the pressure is on!"
None of our other close friends have kids, so it is a pretty big deal with this group. The guy my DH was talking to has a big mouth and no filter, so he brought up us having babies at least 20 times before the night was over.
I'm not mad at DH, just a little more anxious/nervous now that people know our timeline.
Did anyone else have anything similar happen to them?
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Yes my DH didn't realize I was trying to keep it quiet, but he told all his family (there is a TON of them) that we were going to try after our trip in January. It just so happened that on that trip we conceived, so it worked out that there wasn't a lot of pressure. Now the issue is people looking at me more closely to see if we are pregnant, 2 more weeks until we can start telling!
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We didn't tell people, but I had miscarried so our families knew that we wanted a baby and it was pretty easy to figure out we were trying. Luckily since my situation was different they were all too scared to mention it.
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Yes! My husband told his MOTHER. I was sooooooooo mad!!!! So then she was all "I hear you guys are starting soon!" and I had to lie and tell her that we weren't, because she's the type of person that will just keep asking and asking and asking and drive me crazy. There's enough pressure as it is when trying without having people prying about it all the time!
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Up until now we really didn't know when we would start trying, so it was easy to keep it a secret. But now that I"m off the pill I'm a little worried about this. I definitely have to remind my DH not to tell anyone and that yes his family counts as 'anyone'. He has a tendency to make 'exceptions' for his brother and parents when it comes to our private info
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Well we accidentally told his parents. I had purchased some prenatal vitamins to start taking before we really even trying and I hadn't put them away yet so they were sitting on the counter. I was at work one day when my husband was home and he invited his parents to stop by but forgot to put the vitamins away. So, they were in a big ol purple box staring everyone in the face on the kitchen counter. My husband didn't even realize until I pointed it out but his parents never said anything if they did see them. They probably just sat at home and waited every day for a phone call say I was pregnant. Lesson learned for putting things away immediately.
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yeah, we're not trying for a couple more months, but i don't want to announce we're going to be trying either! i hope that DH keeps his mouth shut, but we're both bad at keeping our own secrets as we're pretty open books. i hope i can hide it!
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I have the opposite problem...we decided I'm going off BC in May (we won't start ttc then yet, but switching to condoms then...) and I can't stop myself from telling people! seriously, I've told my mom (who I'm sure told my dad), my bff, another close friend at her bachelorette party (we'd talked about babies before and it innocently came up in conversation) and then she told everyone else there because she was so excited for me (luckily only 2 of them are my friends, but their so's are dh's best friends so I'm sure those guys know now too)... lol, I've told dh I've told all these people, but I def don't think he's happy about it! I feel like I need to tell some people so that I'm not bugging dh to talk about it all the time, and he gets that sort of...but he'd def prefer if I just kept quiet
When we actually start ttc I'll probably be quieter about it because at least then I can talk to him more. we've discussed who we would tell when we're ttc and when we get a bfp, and he still wants to keep that totally secret, but I feel like I'd still want to confide in a select few people whose support would be important to me...it'll be a hard to figure out when we get there!
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We are starting to try in April but both have discussed that we aren't telling people that we have pulled the trigger. Pretty much all my friends are pregnant, have babies or are trying to get pregnant. They all told everyone and then I see every time they don't have a drink with dinner, everyone asks are you pregnant? After seeing some of them going through that for a year, we are keeping quiet. I have said that we will start trying sometime this year, but they all are assuming later this year when DH finishes up with his MBA. It is so hard to not tell people though!!
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For us to ttc its a process I have to come off some meds 3 month ahead of when i come off BC so we have to plan fairly far in advance. I also work with pretty much all women except our CEO. They are constantly prying and looking for any signs with all the girls my age and married. I really don't want to tell anyone we're trying, my luck it will take forever to concieve. I just had to get that "i'm so sorry your having trouble" look.
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