I can't tell you how many people have asked me if I'm dilated yet! Its so weird. How do you even respond when people ask that?
I can't tell you how many people have asked me if I'm dilated yet! Its so weird. How do you even respond when people ask that?
pomegranate / 3759 posts
LOL. I don't think I was ever asked that but I sure would be tempted to tell them to check for ya.
coconut / 8498 posts
Only close friends, which I didn't mind. However, the old man that did our taxes last year had a hundred questions about my birth plan. That was weird.
hostess / wonderful watermelon / 39513 posts
My mom friends would ask me this when I was pregnant with my first LO.
papaya / 10473 posts
This last one was a coworker who isn't even in my department... I don't even know her name! The other was our neighbor that I don't know well.
pomegranate / 3212 posts
Oh man, haven't gotten anything like that at all yet! Fingers crossed....
GOLD / papaya / 10206 posts
No but she came a few weeks early so people didn't have a chance to ask
pear / 1563 posts
NO! I have not gotten this question yet and hope not to, especially from a coworker. I guess I could see my mom asking, and wouldn't be bothered because we've discussed it vis-a-vis when to go to the hospital etc., but she also knows I most likely won't be getting checked.
Am I remembering correctly that you work in women's health? Do you think maybe people think these questions are ok because of the work environment, because I think it's seriously beyond the bounds of what anyone should be asking!
honeydew / 7283 posts
Nope, but a male coworker wanted to talk about my plan to breastfeed a little too much for my comfort. "Are you planning on breastfeeding?" Would have been more than enough for me!
GOLD / wonderful pea / 17697 posts
I never got this directly but a couple of my mom's coworkers (who live across the country and have never met me) would ask her if I was dilated every day for like 6 weeks before I delivered. My mom thought it was hysterical and would always tell me, every day, like clockwork.
I think if someone had asked me that, especially if I was at the end of my pregnancy (when my filter went and died) I would have told them to mind their own effing business and to stop thinking about the state of my vagina.
pomelo / 5331 posts
Ugh, yes. So awkward. I just was very vague like, "Things are moving along" or something. Better than "So basically you want to know what the inside of my vagina is like right now?"
papaya / 10473 posts
@Revel: I would've expected it from one of the labor and delivery nurses, but this was a children's dietician in another department. Awkward!
pear / 1650 posts
I like @ladyfingers's "Things are moving along" idea!! I am dreading getting asked this question. Any other good replies??
@MrsF: goodness!! How far did he take that BF conversation??
watermelon / 14206 posts
Just my MIL. She also kept asking me about my mucus plug, which I thought was gross to ask.
pear / 1992 posts
I was asked a couple times by people I would rather not talk about my cervix with and I lied and told them I didn't know and that I was opting not to be checked.
Then I told them that dilation doesn't really tell you anything about when the baby will arrive, blah blah blah. It kept them from asking again and I was hopeful that letting them know that it wasn't a really important piece of information might keep them from asking someone else in the future.
honeydew / 7283 posts
@Mrslilybugg: The problem was more that he wanted to talk about it every time that I saw him! I would say "yes, I'm planning on breastfeeding" and he would start listing all the reasons that BF is best as if he had to convince me. Talking about pumping after coming back to work and everything.
I think part of it is that, like @Grizz, I work in medicine. This guy is a respiratory therapist who works in my ICU but he probably works in the NICU too. Still, he's not exactly a lactation consultant. It just made me kind of uncomfortable. Oh well!
coffee bean / 44 posts
Yes! Such an uncomfortable topic with all but my closest family and friends! People at work have even asked. Most recently it happened at a lunch meeting! I responded in the most lighthearted, joking tone I could: "since we're all eating here, can we talk about something other than my cervix?" I think using the term cervix helped people realize that it's just wrong to talk about at work.
watermelon / 14467 posts
So, I made the mistake of asking someone. Never again. I was so ashamed. My pregnant friends have talked about their dilation with me, so I didn't even think about it when asking an acquaintance.
pear / 1563 posts
@sarahbee: Good response!
@grizz: Very strange coming from that coworker... why why why....
clementine / 861 posts
@lindseykaye: That's a great idea. I think that the people who are willing to ask these types of ridiculous questions are the same people who will continue to ask until you give them an answer.
honeydew / 7917 posts
Really? I don't remember anyone asking me that questions. Sounds a bit personal to me.
papaya / 10473 posts
So this trend of people asking me has continued.... My MIL asked me in front of FIL last night! I about died! My husband doesn't think its a big deal, but I tried to word my answer strongly enough that she'll never ask me again... but I don't think she got it because she continued on with a few other TMI-type questions. Sigh.
grapefruit / 4823 posts
mainly coworkers would ask me! one woman even screamed it across the office....when I responded 'i'm not' she then yelled back 'are you sure they have the right due date?!' this time i'm not having checks so they can all, not ask! haha
papaya / 10473 posts
@sarbear: That's what I told MIL so she wouldn't ask me again. I told her that I won't be having any cervical checks because they're not a good indication that I'll go into labor. So she continued on "Well when you start to feel like something's happening they'll start doing them then right? What signs are you looking for? Like mucus? Discharge? They need to be doing them!" All still in front of FIL. *bangs my forehead on my desk
grapefruit / 4823 posts
@grizz: OMG! I can't believe she kept asking! I don't know why people think a womans cervix is an ok topic of conversation when they are pregnant! and then to do it in front of your FIL!? oh man!
papaya / 10570 posts
@grizz: When you do lose your mucus plug save it in a tissue for her and bring it out at the dinner table for her inspection!!
coconut / 8861 posts
My parents and my brother did. I think I told my boss that I wasn't dilated as he was worried about when I would go into labor. My brother was super excited for LO's birth, so after he's had 3 kids, he wanted to know what my status was.
pear / 1650 posts
@grizz: OH EM GEE. "mucus? discharge?" My forehead is on my desk for you too.
honeydew / 7091 posts
@grizz: Oh good grief... I would say respond back with a personal question about *her*, but it sounds like she wouldn't have a problem talking about anything!!
GOLD / pineapple / 12662 posts
@Grizz: Yes, they asked. Repeatedly. And usually while several other people were standing around within ear shot. And my response? "I don't know. But what I do know is that I am embarrassed that you just asked me that question!" It helped, but it didn't stop it. *augh*
@Smurfette: Ditto! I mean seriously . . . I don't want my coworkers thinking about any part of my body other than my brain!
papaya / 10473 posts
@MsLipGloss: I think I will borrow your response! I'm not confrontational at all, so that gets the point across that their question was not ok without me feeling like I was a jerk about telling them.
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