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None of their business since they aren't providing for them! I don't make life decisions to bring others happiness-unless it just works out for us, too.

@runsyellowlites: I'm excited to make my parents grandparents, but I wouldn't have TTC sooner because of it. (sidenote - my grandmothers are in their 90s! DH's dad is almost 63. It's great that you have such young grandparents!)

@blackbird: Agreed.

I'm lucky that our timing has been perfect and my parents are still young enough to be able to enjoy at LEAST a great childhood for our children. Ultimately though, I need to live my life and it needs to happen on my timeline.

Life is so unpredictable, they could demand it and then die the next day or their kid dies or whatever. It's just not right to put that kind of pressure on your kids.

My grandparents were young, They *could* still be alive if it weren't for their health problems. I wish so much they could have seen me get married and have children. They got to see all my cousins do that so I feel like it was really unfair. But that's life.

@blackbird: +1

My mom (62) and dad (64) are awesome. As much as I would for my children to know their grandparents especially their super awesome grandma, my children will come when they come. And we will try for them when we feel ready to try for them. My parents ask about grandkids, but their isn't any pressure. I think they just want to have something to say, because Borth Jane made it perfectly clear the best part about grandchildren are they go back to the parents!

I had an awesome grandparent for a short period of my life. My mom's mother passed when I was 8. I wasn't close with my other grandparents, one is still living. I am sure he could care less about whether I have children a nd he gets to see or hold great grands of mine. .

i think if it works out, it's great!! and i definitely did think about these things when i was growing up and as dh and i decided to have kids. I guess it wasn't hard to decide to ttc quickly because we already wanted to, but i do totally understand your thought process and i think it is good to consider your parents and grandparents. they love us so much!

having said that haha i didn't have much choice as to when i got married, so in the end, i am having kids at 28+ (having my second in a few months and just turned 30 yesterday!), my parents are 59/60 and my sweet grandparents are in their 90's! i'm glad they get to meet their great grandchildren! but it for sure would have been super cool if they were all younger, and i'm sure they would agree, too

I do for sure. My FIL is an incredibly sweet and generous man and more loving to me than my own dad in many ways. They already had 2 grandkids, but I REALLY want him to know our kids as long as he can. DH is always saying how up in age he is getting, and I used that point a lot when we would consider TTC. It will also factor in to how long we really wait for #2. My parents are quite a bit younger so I never worried too much. Though I did think about MY grandmother and wanting her to have time with my LO(s).

My timing is my own. You never know what will happen in life, anyways. Death can come from many other places besides old age.

But, my parents were young when they had me, and DH's parents were even younger when they had him, so really, it's not an issue as far as their age.

We definitely considered our parents' ages when TTC. We wanted to give them a grandchild before they became too old - not only for their sake but also our children. My DH and I both had older grandparents who passed away early in our lives. We are envious of our friends with grandparents who are only 80 now and still healthy. (FIL will be the oldest grandparent at 63 when our LO is born)

Personally, I feel like it's none of their business really. I can't imagine that people would want to rush their children into marriage/childrearing before they are ready, just so they can be young grandparents.

In any case, in my family, we had it both ways. My parents married at 19 and had their first kid at 20 (my older brother). He got married (because the girl was pregnant) at 20 and the baby was also born when he was 20. So my parents became grandparents at 39. Those nieces and nephews of mine also knew their great grandparents well.

However, that brother has now on his third marriage, because he was really not ready to be married and have a child in the first place...it's affected the rest of his life. He's been through so many horrible times financially that would be normal for a 20-something year old, but is devastating for someone trying to support a family.

On the other hand, my parents had me when they were 36, and I'm just now having my first child at the age of 33. I waited (and dated A LOT) until I was absolutely, positively sure that I was not only in love, but also making a good decision choosing a partner to get married. We didn't have kids till we were totally financially ready. My grandparents have passed away, and our parents are older and may not see our kids' college graduations----but the tradeoff is that our kids will have a more stable environment growing up.

That's a tradeoff I'm willing to make.

I have never planned my life around my parents. However, it was always very important to me that my dad got to be a grandpa. He's 11 years older than my mom, and had a very serious heart attack four years ago. While he does have congestive heart failure, he has made a miraculous recovery, and is doing fabulously.

My parents have always been beyond supportive, and adamant about me doing things at my own pace. They never pressured for a son-in-law or a grandchild. However, I am so beyond thrilled they will both be here for DD's arrival.

I don't think I would change my plans at all because of my or Hubs' parents, but I did think of them when we started TTC. I wanted to give them grandchildren before they were 60, but that worked out with my plans anyway.

I think about it, because until very recently, I still had 3 grandparents living and I'm almost 24 (my grandfather just passed away 2 months ago). One set of my grandparents were very close to me growing up and even now, so I do want my kids to have that.

My parents and DH's parents were in their 30s when they had us, but he and I are relatively young (will be 24 and 25 when this baby is born), so our parents are 55-60. I'm glad it has worked out that way, but if we weren't ready, we wouldn't have had kids yet simply based on our parents.

I do think about it at times-growing up people always thought my grandparents were my parents because my parents were so young .My mom is still in her 40's, so While she would love grandchildren, i think she would have a tough time being a "grandma" Lol age identification wise. My MIL is much older and already has some so it would be fine.

This never factored into my planning because the most important things for me were meeting the right person, buying a house and being financially and emotionally secure - and that took until I was 30!! But now you come to mention it, it is quite sad to think that my children will probably lose their grandparents at quite a young age and may never get to have that precious relationship with them. We lost my dad last year so he will never meet his grandchildren......