In staff meeting this morning, my boss mentioned that next week will be my last and then said "you seem to have had a really easy pregnancy!" and it kind of bothered me! I spent the entire summer trying not to puke at my desk, ended up on nausea meds for awhile and was hospitalized for a kidney stone. I have tried hard to balance my diet/incorporate exercise/have my hair and makeup done/get plenty of sleep...but the conclusion isn't that I'm handling things well, it's that I'm having an easy time. RAWR! Why can't they just salute me for being hardcore?
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I felt like that the whole time, too.
People don't understand. And (very) thankfully, we forget. -
Don't listen to what people say, people don't think before they talk. Yea, that's so exciting you are getting close to your due date!!!
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You are totally hardcore!!!
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That's so odd! I feel like I need to keep up appearances and not slack because of my pregnancy, so I only complain to family about the hardships and keep a happy face for work. So people at work and not so close friends would probably say it was easy, where DH would say it was not, you know?
(I mean, I'm only 13 weeks in, and had nausea but no vomiting, so i know I kind of did have it easy, compared to a lot of people) -
I think a lot of women complain about pregnancy, so if you haven't really, and you look good everyone thinks you must have had it easy! I'd take it as a compliment that you must look great!
I actually have had a pretty easy pregnancy so far (knock on wood that it continues!) and I kind of feel the opposite when someone will say to me 'aren't you ready to get that baby out?!' or 'oh you must be counting the hours!' I still feel normal at 37 weeks and I'm not wishing to give birth before 40 weeks so I always say no and think they must think I'm huge or waddling around like a big old duck!
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I agree with @JerricaBenton: I think people think it is easy if you aren't complaining all the time. People don't realize sometimes we just choose to keep things to ourselves.
People ask me all the stop how I am feeling. I say fine. I am not about to tell them well I am really constipated and uncomfortable.
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Dude, I totally salute you for being hardcore.
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@tororojo: I hear you! My boss was pregnant 3 months behind me and she gained more weight than me, so when I was 7 mos preg and she was 4 mos preg, we'd gained about the same. I busted my ass going to the gym all the way to 39 wks and trying to eat healthy. She never worked out and ate everything in sight, BUT she would make comments about me all the time saying I never ate anything, and one of my coworkers told me that she made a comment to them saying all I ate was lettuce. I wanted to say something but couldn't bc she's my BOSS!
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I think it was a compliment!
They were really saying, "You did a great job this whole time, and we didn't notice any difference in your performance. You are awesome!"
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Not for having an easy pregnancy, but I did feel judged for not gaining much weight. I started at 123 and gained 18 lbs. I also puked multiple times daily for 6 months and several times a week after that. No diets here.
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@.twist.: @ladyfingers: So sweet; you ladies know just what to say!
@PrincessBaby: Yikes, that's awkward! And also rude and out of place, boo...tough when it's your boss!
@mrbee: Coming from some people I would see it as a compliment. But the guys I work with are kind of snarky and judgmental and I don't think they consider me awesome, just lucky. Most of their wives spent 9 months of pregnancy on the couch eating ice cream, definitely not working, and that's how they think pregnant women are supposed to act--I know because they make comments all the time! It does inspire me to try hard to break the stereotype, though.
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@smurfette: I have no problem saying, "I'm really uncomfortable" when people ask me how I'm feeling. But I say it with a smile on my face, lol I also then add "but only 7* more weeks to go!"
*depending on which week I'm on, lol.
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I totally envy people who have easy pregnancies. It might sound judgemental if I commented on it, but it was total jealousy, and I am not too proud to admit it! For some perspective I had hyper emesis, GD and PIH, so I consider pretty much anything less than that "easy" LOL!
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@tororojo: You rock and you are hardcore.
@MsMini: Hey, knowing where you're coming from, you're one of the only people I would let tell me I had an easy pregnancy without getting annoyed.Also "uncomplicated" is not necessarily "easy."
Annnnnnd if all those guys are comparing you their wives--just hold it right there! My husband probably thinks my pregnancy was even worse than I thought it was because (aside from HB) he was the only person I could really complain to. He got the brunt of it! If your coworkers are comparing you to their wives they are jaded.
What I'm trying to say here is you rock. And I hope you get an easy recovery and safe childbirth.
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Everyone kept commenting on how great I looked, but they would always throw something like, "I'm sure you will lose the weight in no time" or "You look like you have barely gained" and made it sound like it was easy for me. But I had GD and worked hard at my diet and still gained 40 lbs!
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So far, no, but I have noticed that no one wants to hear me complain about the pregnancy things that are bothering me lol. I think people would rather thing we have easier pregnancies than be told all the crappy stuff that happens! No fair
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@tororojo: I have had a lot of shitty complications but like you, powered through. And yes I get offended when people are like "but you always look so put together, it can't be that bad." They don't know that it took me 1.5 hours to put on my makeup because I had to take frequent breaks to overcome the nausea and sweats, etc... It's just like if you're thin, people will be all "oh I wish I was lucky enough to be thin like you." Not knowing how much you exercise or what your diet is. Or "I wish I was lucky enough to have a good job..." That's not luck, that's hard work to succeed. Ya know?
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I'd also take it as a compliment like Mr Bee said! So many people expect pregnant women to start slacking and not being as productive or just complaining a lot.
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