Have you actually stopped doing something because of mommy guilt?

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Have you actually stopped doing something because of mommy guilt?

By heffalump Sep 13, 2012

For a while I was trying to get my LO to like tv. I get really bad migraines and it would be really helpful to me if she would just sit there and give me a break for a little bit when I'm not feeling well. She took to it for about a week, but then got over it pretty quickly. And during that whole week I felt SOOOOOO guilty!

Everything you read says no TV until 2 years old. My LO is 13 months. Do I believe that a little bit of TV is going to hurt her? No way. Then why do I feel so guilty? I don't know..... but I do. So I stopped. It's just not worth it to me. I don't think less of other people who's LO's watch TV. In fact I'm envious of them. I'm envious that the mommy guilt doesn't take over, that their kids actually like tv, and that they get a break.

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19 comments

stargal
pomegranate / 3890 posts

Sep 13, 2012

oh ya sometimes i feel bad taht i dont engage him enough but hes only 9 weeks old and its hard to wanna play with him over and over agian when there is little he can do. but yup mommy guilt does happen.
i also feel very very very gulty, embarressed that i cant breastfeed him. i really wanted to and my milk never fully came in and he kept losing a bunch of weight....yup big mommy guilt there...
cvbee
nectarine / 2039 posts

Sep 13, 2012

@artbee: I also stopped watching tv during the day because of LO. Sometimes I sneak a little in at nap time.
heffalump
GOLD / wonderful grape / 20289 posts

Sep 13, 2012

@cvbee: I always watch tv at nap time! I don't stop watching tv myself, I just don't let her watch it
LivsMama
pear / 1728 posts

Sep 13, 2012

TV as well. I considered stopping working because I felt SO guilty about going to work every day when its not 100% necessary. But thats not practical. I still cry about it more than once a week though.
Mrs. Pen
blogger / wonderful cherry / 21616 posts

Sep 13, 2012

@LivsMama: aww!!! sending you a big hug!!

yeah TV as well, I let him watch Signing Time so I have less guilt about that. And usually it's only on days he doesn't nap well.
sugar
cherry / 111 posts

Sep 13, 2012

I work and have little time with my LO during the day. Then I come home and find myself checking my phone- nothing important- when we are having play time. MAJOR Mommy guilt for checking my phone when I should be interacting with my baby.
regberadaisy
GOLD / wonderful pomegranate / 28905 posts

Sep 13, 2012

aww I totally get mommy guilt with the TV. I will literally turn her rocker so that it's not facing the TV and she will strain her neck to watch TV!
My mommy guilt is what keeps me on a strict diet!
autumnlove
hostess / wonderful watermelon / 39513 posts

Sep 13, 2012

Watching TV and expressing road rage!
LivsMama
pear / 1728 posts

Sep 13, 2012

@sugar: Ive made a point to put my phone away when I get home now bc I was feelin so guilty. But thats what I use to snap all my photos, so I keep it within reach for that. I wont answer texts (except DHs) or check email or internet. I always feel so bad if I do lol.

Why do us moms feel guilt about EVERYTHING?! =o)

@Coco Bee: thanks =o) Funny, I was never a crier before Liv came. I was also gung-ho career woman, and now I cry constantly about working even though I love my job.
heffalump
GOLD / wonderful grape / 20289 posts

Sep 13, 2012

@LivsMama: Awww I get mommy guilt because my LO isn't in day care! I feel like she's not getting good socialization and she won't learn things from other kids, and she won't do things like talk and walk as quickly as she could if she were around kids all the time. Grass is always greener!

@sugar: I wish my DH had daddy guilt. He's ALWAYS doing that and doesn't get why it bothers me. I ask what he's doing on the phone and he says it's ok because I'm in the room playing with her. And then I tell him she wants to play with HIM too! Why does he need me to tell him that???
sugar
cherry / 111 posts

Sep 13, 2012

Oh @livsmama, I cry all the time because I work. I WAS a career type person, now I want a job that gives me as much time with my LO as possible. I so wish I could work 80%. I am hoping that someday that will be possible!
plaidpants
kiwi / 691 posts

Sep 13, 2012

The Dr. Sears baby book is kind of anti play yard and it just stuck with me, so I really try not to use it. But now that my LO is crawling, sometimes I just need 5 minutes that I'm not keeping her hands out of the electrical outlets and pulling lint out of her mouth. So usually once a day I end up sticking her in the PnP so I can have a snack and check my email. It's like a mom time-out, but I still feel so guilty about it.
heffalump
GOLD / wonderful grape / 20289 posts

Sep 13, 2012

@pointybird: as long as my lo was happy playing in the pnp I was fine with it. But she was rarely happy in there.....
Mrs. Pen
blogger / wonderful cherry / 21616 posts

Sep 13, 2012

Oh! I thought of another one while I went to the gym... I alway feel bad taking LO out because it can mess with his sleep.

If I stay home we both get kinda bored and restless. But when we go out, he alway gets overtired and overstimulated and his sleep is messed up. Or there are some things that I can't do within his 1.5-2 hour window between naps and then he skips a nap or takes a ten minute car nap.

I always feel awful going places I think once he's old and can stay awake for more than 2 hours at a time it will be easier.
LivsMama
pear / 1728 posts

Sep 14, 2012

@artbee: I dont get guilt about that too badly (she has a nanny) but she brings her to the playground a lot and to the playroom where there are always other kids. But I considered bringing Liv to daycare one day a week to see how she does. I think she might hate it though, so Il start with weekend classes. Swimming/music/etc

@sugar: glad Im not the only one. I was so career oriented and was like "dont worry, Ill only be out for 6 weeks and Im not gonna BF so no pumping breaks." Literally the SECOND I heard her cry, I looked at DH and said "I have to nurse her" and then emailed my boss and HR from the recovery room and said "see ya in 12 weeks, and also gonna need a key to the Lactation room" lol. I think we should start a business for us moms who want to be home more. Just need an idea that will take off...
heffalump
GOLD / wonderful grape / 20289 posts

Sep 14, 2012

@LivsMama: I do mommy and me classes, music class at the library, etc. But I just don't think it's the same as that 8 hours straight in daycare. We also can't afford daycare..... even for a day since we don't need it. So she's stuck with me
mediagirl
hostess / wonderful persimmon / 25556 posts

Sep 14, 2012

We have turned off our TV and turned our computer that is hooked to it to Pandora. I have Mommy guilt for going to work. Right now it's not so bad because she's with my Mom. When she goes to daycare on October 1st, I'm going to cry my eyeballs out.
LivsMama
pear / 1728 posts

Sep 14, 2012

@artbee: grass is always greener right? lol. I get why you feel that guilt, but look at how many people grew up with a parent at home (and with a parent at work in my case) and turned out totally socially fine. I keep telling myself that, and its easy advice to give others, but accepting it yourself is so hard =o/
heffalump
GOLD / wonderful grape / 20289 posts

Sep 14, 2012

@LivsMama: My mom was a SAHM, and I'm crazy shy and have lots of anxiety around people. Probably why I have this mommy guilt about it. I always hope my LO takes after DH, he loves people!

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Have you actually stopped doing something because of mommy guilt?

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