LO has a friend who is 3 weeks younger than her and when she comes over she takes toys from my LO, right off her lap! I know this baby is only 8 months old but I don't want this habit to continue as they get older. The thing is, her mom was sitting right there, and then proceeded to show her LO how to play with the toy. I felt so bad for my LO (naturally), but I didn't say anything because I had no idea what to say. We are all about sharing, even at a young age, but I feel like this wasn't ok. I need some advice on how to handle a situation like this in the future 
You might also enjoy...
-
I see this happen a lot with my nephew. His parents are SO good about teaching him to share, and not take toys away from kids. They're also very good about being conscious of what he's doing while playing with other kids, and appropriately scolding him if he happens to be rude.
Unfortunately, other parents of his friends aren't so good. His cousins will take toys from him, but my poor SIL doesn't know what to do! The other moms don't do anything about it, so then my poor nephew is so sad and doesn't understand why other kids don't have to follow his same rules
So, no advice, just saying that I know how you feel (from the sidelines).
-
I just say, "No stealing toys, you wouldn't like it if W snatched a toy you were playing with!" lol
We go to a lot of playgroups, all the Moms take that approach.
-
I think if I see this happen frequently and the parents DON'T say something I would probably indirectly say something via my child.
Something like "M, it's OK X wants to play with your toys. We have to *share*."
I have gotten very Mama Bear with my nieces/nephews in play scenarios when they were younger so I don't think I will have an issue speaking up for my own kid!
-
If C doesn't care, I don't do or say anything about it. If he does care, I remind him to share and hopefully the other parent is paying attention. If they aren't I can't correct their child, only my own. Now, if C takes another kid's toy, I tell him that he must ask first or wait for the other kid to be finished before taking the toy.
-
I say something. Usually along the lines of, "we have to share" but I don't have to say anything often because the parents are usually on top of it.
-
Hmm... at the park, kids will pick up L's toys and play with them and I don't mind. At this age he doesn't care and I would rather teach him to share than try to teach the other kids. Uusally the other parents will say something and I say it's ok, L can share his toys. Sometimes he will go after another kid's toys and if they make a stink, I'll ask if they can share. If they say no, we go play somewhere else.
-
Thanks guys! Yeah it wouldn't have bothered me so much if my LO wasn't actually playing with the toy but it was a xylophone and she had it on her lap, in her hand. There were a billion other toys around lol of course kids always want the one that someone else has
-
If she's actively interacting with the toy then I might say something along the lines of she's still playing with that, we'll finish up soon and let you have a turn, though sometimes I just let it go. I step in a bit less now as she gets older though to let her figure out some problem solving skills and to see how she handles it.
-
This is such an interesting topic to me! I've observed many infants playing (children in infant classes and now my own son) and I don't think infants have a concept of "ownership" over toys. I watch young babies play together without adults around and most of the time they aren't upset about another child taking their toy. It seems like it happens more often when it's in a parent-involved play situation, since we don't want to be seen as "rude".
If my son has a toy taken from him, I wait before saying anything & he often resolves it in his own way (choosing another toy, watching the other kid use the toy & picking it up when the other child is finished). If he's upset, then I'll say something like "You want that toy and now he/she has it. What should we do now?" and wait to see what he does. I have a harder time when my son takes the toy, because I'd like to let them work it out on their own but often that's not what the other parents are comfortable with.
I think babies are often more interested in interacting with each other (like the giving and taking of toys) than the actual toys.
-
@mewtill: I agree. I'm all about kids working things out on their own, honestly.
-
@Mewtill - Yeah, I'm mostly about kids working it out on their own. If someone takes a toy from my daughter, I wait for her reaction. If she doesn't mind, which is frequent, I let it be. If she minds, I usually come and take it back from the child and tell them not to take things from her. But I find that she often just moves on in this situation - she usually doesn't care.
If she takes a toy from another child, I'll usually do the same - take it from her and tell her not to do it again.
Reply
Subscribe to our newsletter
- Google Plus
- Stumbleupon
- Twitter
- Facebook
- Pinterest
- Favorite0
11 comments