If someone is having their 2nd LO, do you buy two gifts? One for the newborn and one for the older child? My mom always told me that was the polite thing to do. Just curious what other people do...
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I don't, generally speaking. If the other child were super-close to me (like my neices and nephews) I might get them something small like a coloring book.
I know this goes against the grain of modern parenting trends, but I personally don't like to teach children that they deserve something for themselves anytime someone else gets a gift.
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I do. But I also agree with @Anagram. I like to get the older child something small, but something they can *do* - a small interactive toy or crayons and a coloring book. For me, getting the older child something isn't as much for the child as it is for the parents when you give the child something that will entertain them while the parents are busy with the new baby.
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No, I do not.
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Sometimes I do and sometimes I don't!
When my 2nd was born a friend sent both my kids a new bath towel - DS loved that he and his new sister matched!
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Sometimes I do sometimes I don't.
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Sometimes I do, sometimes I don't. Just depends on the person.
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It depends on the person, and how well I know them/their first LO.
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I echo what other people said.. it depends on my relationship with the mom / the child.
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I generally don't unless I'm very close to them.
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Nope. But- I rarely buy gifts for a second baby, unless the mom and I are very close. Too many babies.
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It depends on who it is, I agree with @septca: though that my goal is to pick something for the older kid that they can do independently. It is no help to the parents if I get their 2 year old a 400 piece Play Mobil set...
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Not necessarily, but I did think it was amazingly kind when people did it when I had my second child, so if it's someone I know well, yes.
I don't think it's teaching children they "deserve" something whenever someone else gets a gift, but when you have a new addition to the family, you know it can be a difficult transition and a little detail like that helps. As does carefully acknowledging the older child when you go to see the baby. I think a lot of people are like "THE BABY! THE BABY!" and that sucks for the older sib.
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Depends on how close we are to the family, as a personal choice.
Regionally around here most ppl just gift the new baby
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@mamimami: That was my moms reasoning as well.
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@septca: I normally give a coloring book and crayons.
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I will get a 2nd gift if its a niece or nephew or close friend.
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I gave my niece a few books on being the older sibling.
I don't feel any need for people to get my LO something when #2 comes. He is too little to really understand gifts, he would just like an extra snuggle. And also, second kids don't often get anything new, so I think it's nice to celebrate the kid by him/herself.
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My friends are still just having LO #1, so I haven't had to think about it. My guess is that if it's for a shower or sprinkle, I'll just give something for the new baby. I agree with others, though, that my relationship with mom & baby might change that.
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I don't, but that's based on seeing my niece/nephew growing up thinking that they have to get a present too on the other one's birthday. I don't want that for my kids and I don't buy sibling gifts when I'm giving a new baby gift.
It's also not very common where I live to do that, so I was surprised when my husband's family did it.
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@avivoca: oh I don't give two gifts for bdays, only baby showers. And usually the gift is very small, under $5.
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Nope. I only buy two gifts if it's a holiday.
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I don't but a few of my friends did this.
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Not really. Generally just the new baby.
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Generally I don't, but if it's my nieces and nephews, I'll try to get a group gift for the older kids to keep them busy for a while (or get them outside and out from under Mom's feet)
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No.
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I don't know anyone with 2+ kids, but I would consider buying something small for the older sibling (maybe a coloring book or puzzle). When I had my second, DS1 didn't receive gifts from family and friends, but we did get him a gift from his baby brother.
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I don't normally give a gift for the second baby .... unless they're having a different gender from their first. Otherwise, I just bring diapers, meal. If I'm close to the parents, then I'll also add a gift card to target or amazon and yes, I will bring a small "i also remembered you" gift but it's usually a sticker book or coloring books ... something that won't make noise!
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Oops, I haven't! Just the new baby.
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28 comments