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@birdofafeather: Haha. Plus, all of the pregnancy tests I know I'd have to purchase in those 10 years. Because I think I'm pregnant all of the time.
While I generally trust my midwives, we will not be waiting 10 years. -
3 years. I like it because my older LO was fairly independent and potty trained by the time the younger one came along, so I didn't feel like I had 2 babies. They are still close enough that they play together quite a bit (they are now 6 and 3).
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21 months.
I love everything about this age gap, although I would've liked them even closer together too! It was hard in the beginning, having two in diapers and our oldest not being very independent, but now (2.5 and 4), I couldn't imagine having it any other way! They are both interested in a lot of the same things and can plan together and have fun together. We'll be able to take them places that they will both enjoy. And they'll always have someone close in age to play with or hang out with when we travel. I love it!
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We have 3y3m gap and its been pretty perfect and i can only see it getting better until maybe when they hit teen years. Dd just loves her baby and she is very helpful. She is somewhat independent so that helps.... She can get me things I need and can help herself to snacks. I wanted a two year gap but it didn't work out and I'll be the first to admit it ended up even better
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This is a very helpful thread! We're TTC #2 right now and so if I get pregnant this month it will be exactly 3 years. But part of me wants to reverse course and wait 6 more months so they'd be a little further apart and born in different seasons. Mainly bc my LO is starting to get more difficult and at this moment I can't imagine having to also deal with a 2nd child! But I know she'll be in a different place 9 months from now either way.
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3 years + 10 days. The only con is the birthdays so close together!!! Otherwise this age gap has been fantastic and I recommend it to everyone
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Not sure if we're 2 and through yet, but we have 2 LO's and they're 30 months apart, boy being the older one. I wanted an age gap closer to 2-2.5 years apart, but I'm really happy with their current age gap. I felt like DS didn't quite the grasp on the fact he was having a baby sister when he was 2. By the time DD arrived, he was already head over heels in love with her. Even when she was a newborn, various family members came to the house to visit and threatened to take her home with them. He immediately screamed no! and bawled his eyes out.
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@sslm: Same. Our girls are 3 years, 4 days apart. It's going to make birthdays interesting when they are older.
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@sslm: @avivoca: Same deal over here. My son was born 6 days before my daughter turned 3. The best part is that my nephew was born 2 days after my son, and his sister (my niece) was born (2 years and) a week before that! All four grandkids have their birthdays in a 12 day window. And both parents planned the first kid, and were surprised by the second kid! Apparently our children really like the month of November.
ETA: In an even weirder twist, my brother (the father of the above referenced niece and nephew) is 3 years and 2 days older than me. It was never and issue having our birthday's so close so that gives me hope. The bigger issue for my planning my kids' birthdays is that it's also Thanksgiving week.
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@Truth Bombs: In another fun twist, my birthday is four days before H's birthday. So within an eight day period, we have four birthdays (A shares a birthday with my dad).
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@avivoca: I know lots of families who have birthdays bunched together like us. It's crazy, but fun!
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I'm due with my second in a few weeks now and they'll be 3y 9m apart. I was really bummed about this age gap at first... We were hoping for around 3 years. It was actually working out that way too until I MC, then it took us 7 months to get pregnant. At first, I really dwelled on the fact that we weren't getting the gap that we had wanted but as time went on, I feel really good about the gap we're going to have. DD is so much more independent and she's so excited for her little brother. Plus she was kind of a nightmare during her "threenager" phase and sometimes I do wonder how we would've gotten through it with a newborn/infant. I think that even when things don't necessarily go according to plans, they still have a way of working out
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4 years 3 months. We're very happy with the long gap - we got to really enjoy our time as a family of 3, our son is so into being a big brother and loves his baby sister so much, and he's quite independent and has a lot going on in his life (school, friends, activities), so no jealousy yet.
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We were aiming for 2.5 years but ended up with a gap of 3y2m. We are 6 months in and so far it's been a great age gap. We had gotten through all the major toddler transitions before DS arrived and DD is much more independent now than she was at 2.5 or even 3. She has also been amazing with the baby and they even "play" together already (DD loves to dance or jump around to make DS laugh). Not sure how it will be when he becomes more mobile but right now, I'm really enjoying this gap and I don't regret that it's bigger than what we originally wanted.
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We have a gap of 33 months, which is the perfect balance so far. For the sake of the two of them becoming close and being able to play together, I would have liked them to be more like 2 years apart. But have two kids is really hard, especially at first. By being a little older, LO1 is much more independent and helpful. LO2 is almost 10m and LO1 is 3.5 now. It's really fun to see them play together and I'm hopeful that it will get even better as LO2 gets older and more able to play. And down the line they will only be 2 years apart in school, which I think will make it feel like they's only a 2 year difference.
@littlejoy: I got my tubes tied with my 2nd c-section. And no one questioned it at all. I would have been so mad if they told me to wait 10 years. For one, I'm 39, so I don't exactly have 10 years of fertility left
. But I'm just so, so done with pregnancy. Even if I wanted more children, I just can't do pregnancy again.
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Just under 2 years. The first year was ROUGH. But its much better now and they are "besties".
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Our kids are 2 years and 3 weeks apart. (July birthday for LO1 and early August for LO2). For us, it's been great! But I feel like part of that is luck of the draw. LO1 is exceptionally chill and laid back, so she didn't ever have the jealousy or tantrum issues after getting a new siblings.
They are really, really close! They are going to turn 2 and 4 this summer. Having them the same season and being same gender means I get to reuse all the clothes and shoes and gear. Even though LO1 is not even 4, she's a wise little one, so she's almost like another parent--I don't try to make her that way, it's just her personality. Like she mimics us a lot and tries to teach little sister new words, or how to recognize certain animals, or will chastise her for climbing, or run to her when she gets hurt. It's adorable. And little sister LOVES her big sister--sometimes when she wakes in the night, she calls out for LO1 instead of for us!
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@erinbaderin: My husband is ready to make the appointment now, and LO2 isn't even here just yet, lol.
@ShootingStar: Totally!! I'd tell a 20 year old to wait 10 years before making that choice ... but I'm in my 30's, and we have a pretty clear idea of our big picture plan!!
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@Anagram: Same with my girls. I have barely had to purchase things for A because she's wearing all of her sister's hand-me-downs and lets be honest, baby clothes stay in good condition because they grow so fast!
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This is a helpful thread!
Before pregnancy, while I was pregnant and immediately postpartum I thought we'd be one and done, even though my husband always wanted more. Now that DD is here and we are out of the newborn trenches I have come around to wanting one more, so we have been loosely discussing spacing. I think we are going to aim for at least a 2 year 9 month age gap, so essentially start TTC when she's 2. My DH wants a smaller gap but I just don't think I'll be ready before she's 2. I'd be happy with a 3 year gap. I want her to be out of diapers, a little more independent, and possibly in a nursery school program before I add a newborn to the mix. My younger sister and I are 2 years and 9 months apart and we are very close so I have no issues with that gap! We will see how it all shakes out.
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@Anagram: That's a great point! Even if we end up with a 3 year age gap, they can wear the same clothes! It seems like there are pros and cons no matter how you look at it.
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@IRunForFun: I'm in the same boat (besides knowing I always wanted 2+.) Even though having kids two years a part seems great, it just wasn't the best time for us. I was finishing my master's and finally felt like I got my body back. It would be one thing if pregnancy was easy on me, but it wasnt. If you had asked me 9 months ago, I would have said HECK NO. Now, I am ready, like give-me-the-baby-now ready. It's like a switch flipped and I am ready (mostly) for pregnancy and all that comes with it.
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We're 2.5 months short of a 4 year gap. I originally had planned on having them closer together, but life got in the way. This has been amazing though. E can entertain or take care of himself when necessary and he was better able to understand and adapt to the changes that came with a new baby. Now she's 15 months and they love each other so much. Plus we have a much smaller amount of time where we have two in daycare... so my wallet likes that, lol.
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@Coral: I felt the same way about a switch going off. We were seriously going through the steps of foster to adopt. And then DS turned 2 and we were getting all nostalgic, looking at his baby pics. And suddenly, DH and both wanted another baby.
We tried that month and that was all it took! We now have a 2 year 9 month gap, lol.
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A switch flipped for me when LO1 was about 2.5.
But we put off TTC for a few months to be sure.LO2 is 3 years and 5 months younger. It's a good gap and we are definitely done. DH got a vasectomy scheduled shortly after LO2 turned 1.
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Our boys are almost exactly 3 years apart. We were planning to have them closer together, but God had other plans for us. Overall, I love their gap. LO1 is so sweet and affectionate with LO2, and they both very much love each other. LO1 was at the point where he understood what was going on, and it was exciting for him to gain a younger brother. He wears the older brother badge with honor. I think the sweetest thing is watching them in the car together. LO2 will quietly ask LO1 for something, and he shares his food or a toy with him without one of us even asking. I love how considerate they are of each other.
While I generally trust my midwives, we will not be waiting 10 years. 
. But I'm just so, so done with pregnancy. Even if I wanted more children, I just can't do pregnancy again.
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