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I think this is an interesting thread.
If I had a choice... I don't think I would ttc at 35+.
BUT life is not as simple as that and choices are not as simple as that... espeically when it comes to kids.
If having kids earlier meant settling for a guy that was not that great... then I would say yes I would ttc at 35+ if it meant I could have a kid with a great guy!
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@Anagram: That's such a good point! My inlaws are the same age as my mum but are in way better shape. I'm infinitely less fit in my 30s than I was in my 20s but that's more related to my poor lifestyle choices - poor diet, no exercise - rather than the natural aging process. So I shoukd have said"I wish I had stayed fit into my thirties to have my children" rather than "I should have had my kids in my twenties when I was fit"!!!
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@regberadaisy: If I could have "planned" it I would have been done by 35 for sure, but life is harder to plan for some than others... we just had our DD and I am 29 It took us 3 yrs to have her, I pray the next do not take as long, we want 3 kiddos sooo 35 is probably in the cards.... again "if" I could plan I'd love them to be about 1 1/2- 2 yrs apart.....
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If I had a choice, and I wanted to TTC over 35, then absolutely. I'm 32 at the moment, and if the urge to reproduce past my 35th birthday comes up then I'll go for it. I'm sure if its not meant to happen then my body will let me know, whether its now or after 35.
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An awful lot of offense being taken in this thread. I would personally never choose to have children past 35, if I had the choice, which I did. The reason? My father was 37 when I was born, and he died when I was 28. So I have a pretty big interest in having children as young as possible, which for me, was 27.
It's easy to make assumptions about why people feel the way that they do, but they're rarely correct. I have no interest in the age that other people choose to have children at - I just had a very specific desire for myself, due to my life circumstances.
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@sarac: my father was also 37 when I was born, and like you I was 28 when he passed away aged 65. It was a pretty good to spend those 28 years with him
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My reason for personally hoping I'm done TTC by 35 is due to child spacing. Had my first at (just under) 29 and want 3 within 5 years spread. But life gets in the way so I wouldn't stop TTC at a certain age but when we felt our family was complete.
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We will have 3 by the time I'm 30 and maybe one more by 35 if we decide it's in the cards. Since my husband is much older than me (mid 50s) I wouldn't try past that, given we know that the time he'll get with our kids is more limited than if he were 35.
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We didn't even think about it. Pregnant at 25/30/35/40 - who cares? You do it when the time's right. Not before, and not after. The universe is funny that way.
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Yes. We're about to have our first. I'm 36. I feel so ready and so very excited to start this chapter of our lives. We lived our 20's the way we wanted to, without having to be responsible for anyone (lots of travel, late nights out, etc.). Our early 30's were kind of spent just being a married couple and learning how to be parents with our dog. (Ha) Now, at 36 and 37, we just feel so blessed to welcome a baby into our lives. I certainly see the pluses of starting earlier, but I'm glad we didn't.
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I think if a kid got between me and multiple cucumber martinis and Manhattan roof bars in my 20s I would have been a sad, sad plantain.
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I never had an age in mind, other than a general late 20s- mid/ late 30s. Even though I had my first baby in my 20s, I managed to travel the world extensively, lived abroad, dated, had fun, lived on my own, got an education, was care-free, established a career, and learned how to be responsible. I didn't miss anything by not waiting for babies until my 30s.
I had my second and last baby 2 weeks after my 30th bday. I don't feel too old or too young. And I wouldn't feel too old if we weren't done having babies for a few years yet. Everyone is different, but I don't love the 'having babies in your 20s means you miss out' comments, or the '35 is too damn old and you won't have the same energy' comments either. I think a lot of things factor in, and everyone is so very different.
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