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Mine are, but their Canadian and I'm American so it's not like its all that different,
MIL does like to take every possible opportunity to point out how Canadians are so much more civilized than Americans. She's a nut job.

I do, and it's silly in my case, because they're American and I'm a New Zealander. We still eat (just about) the same food, speak the same language (I think... although sometimes I'm not so sure ) but I still feel odd and out of place around them. They always make a point of making fun of my accent, so I'm sure that doesn't help!

@glimmersnaps: what does your SO say when that happens?

i feel ya! mixing of cultures can be hard. for the most part i enjoy the cultural part of it (i don't always enjoy my ILs though! haha), but sometimes i feel like the odd one out. they will sit around and speak a language i don't understand (they live in the US now and are all fluent in english), i appreciate when someone stops to tell me what's being discussed, even if i'm not supposed to share my opinion on the topic since i'm a woman. it really bothers me when his younger cousins call me 'white girl'. he's talked to them about it and they stop for a while, but always start up again. i don't want people talking like that when we have LOs, we will simply leave if anyone addresses me that way in front of our children. the food thing i try to be open to even though i'm the world's pickiest eater, i also ask MIL to teach me how to cook some things because it shows interest and desire to carry on traditions. we served goat at our wedding (in addition to other things) because food is easy to incorporate. for clothing i only wear traditional garb to certain events where it is expected. we also aren't as strict on certain traditions depending on who is present and where we are- in our home, i great people as they enter, not in order of status, i serve food and pass it around the table, i don't serve men first and if i have something to add to a conversation, i add it, however when in the homes of his family i try to follow their traditions and if there are other chiefs there i make sure to greet them first, then lolos, then other men. then women and then the children and i always make sure to be physically lower when they speak & serve them first.

not gonna lie, it has caused a few cultures clashes and i have become estranged from some of my own family over it, but DH means the world to me and i respect him and the culture that he came from. i try to think of how grateful i am for how they've expended my views on the world and enriched my life with the differences they bring and that makes putting of with the harder parts easier.

@mrbee: Exactly!

I used to have a hard time with this. From the beginning, they expected me to know their language, even though they spoke English. They'd often talk about how great they are with countless examples. It was amusing at first, but then got very annoying. In my case, I'm actually the foreign one since I moved to their country. So I'd try to understand them. With mine, it's more about not being used to foreigners, and so they lack sensitivity in that sense. If you, your parents, your parents parents and every generation as far back as you can count has ALWAYS done the same thing the same exact way, it can be a little difficult to think differently. Well at least that's what I tell myself

But once DD came along, it's gotten better.

I am sorry you feel this way. This is why I never could be with someone of a different culture. It has nothing to do with any culture in particular. I guess its because I didnt grow up in a very diverse community so it would be a hard adjustment. I hope you can explain it to your SO about your feelings and ways he can make you feel more comfortable.

@mrs. bird: My IL also speak English fluently but converse in French even when they have non-French speakers over. For the most part it's fine but it did seem a bit rude when I first started coming to visit. Now that I understand his mom speaks in a hushed voice sometimes, I can tell when she doesn't want me joining in the convo but she does love having her 'own' language.

@glimmersnaps: DH has a hard time speaking up to his mom too but he had to a few times that first year. My FIL even took her aside a few times, which I think helped more than my husband speaking to her.

@Maysprout: sorry but whore tights? Good grief. It's funny but probably not when it's your MIL.

My inlaws are Mexican but they don't make me feel uncomfortable -- they're very accommodating.

I guess I should say I live in my in-laws' country so I'm pretty much used to not fitting in, like, ever.

@Maysprout: maybe fishnet baby legs weren't the best choice? LOL

@sloaneandpuffy: Hahaha. I should so make those for this next LO, if I'm going to be accused of putting her in whore tights might as well make it good.

@Dapple Grey: We get the fat comments too, my LO is in the 3rd percentile and both my husband and I are very lean, when we try to explain this to my MIL that she doesn't have much to worry about she just says well American babies are so fat it skews the scale.

My in-laws are Colombian and I definitely feel like an outsider. While it doesn't help that my Spanish is shaky (at best) and they speak no English, I've always felt that it was more family culture differences than anything else - they try to make me feel welcome and included, but don't understand when I need down time away from the 12+ people that are always together when we are there. I also only see them 1 time per year when we go visit and they have not been to the US once in the 13 years that DH has lived here. It will be interesting to see how things go once our LO arrives.

My in-laws are from London, but I lived there for a while (and met DH there), so it may be a little easier for me. I think I do fit in with them, and they respect me. To be fair, though, it's not that different culturally!

I'm American and my ILs are French but I speak French fluently and know/adore the culture. There are some things that are definitely different, but I think our relationship works pretty well in the grand scheme of things. I'm not sure how I would feel if I didn't speak their language though (they don't speak much English at all). Being able to communicate makes such a difference.