Did/would you mention it in a pregnancy announcement? I've seen IF bloggers mention their IF in pregnancy announcements so I'm curious. What would you do?
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I have seen this too with some people and personally I am not sure why people do it. I most definitely would not. Personally, if I did not share publicly the fact I had a miscarriage as the miscarriages were happening then there is no reason to share just because I was pregnant. Plus, I see it as a way of still reeling over the fact that you had a miscarriage(s) and not just being excited over the pregnancy itself. I am interested to see if people have other responses.
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I would not, personally. I would keep that between me and the few people I feel comfortable sharing that with.
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Sort of? I said that it had been a tough road to get there. I left it intentionally vague but told people who asked.
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@Eko: true!
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Like @LovelyPlum:, I said that it had been a long journey with some bumps in the road, but I didn't say anything specifically about the miscarriage. I'm really open about it though and I have posted things about it.
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I told some of my friends when we called to announce. At that point, even though we were past the 1st tri, I was still really nervous. So when a few people asked if we were excited, I would say something like "Yes, but I'm very nervous" and explain. I didn't go into the conversations expecting to do that, it just fell out of my face. I didn't mention it in our Facebook announcement.
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I've never been pregnant and so I haven't had a m/c before. If I get pregnant, I think I'll mention my IF journey (because IF can be such a silent struggle). When I get pregnant and if it ends in m/c, I'm not sure how it will feel. I'm sure it will devastate me but I don't know if I will want to mention it or not, publicly. Maybe I will or maybe I won't.
Seeing how difficult it is for some people to get pregnant, I would not be bothered if someone mentioned past struggle or m/c in their announcements. From what I see on here, m/c's are still a loss and some people like to want to pay homage to their past loss. I'm sure they think about their m/c all the time. I think there are positive ways to mention past m/c and still not take bring down the announcement. Just my thoughts on it. People do cope in different ways.
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i did the same things others did...alluded to it being a long, bumpy road to get there. I was fairly open with our struggles to conceive but mostly kept our miscarriages to myself b/c they were so early.
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I've been open about my IF and MC so if I ever get to announce a pregnancy I won't mention it because everyone knows.
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I wouldn't, personally. Then again, I only told very few people that I had one (I didn't even tell my parents).
I think it all depends on how open you have been about TTC.
If I were to say we had bumps in the road during a pregnancy announcement, I think it would invite more questions than I feel comfortable answering, since we have not shared that we are even TTC.
If I was very open, then I might say something about a bumpy road (love that phrasing).
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I wouldn't mention it specifically, but my loss is not a secret
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We sent out announcements for both of our miscarriages, but only to close friends and family. We named both of our daughters and wanted to honor their lives. Because we did that, we will probably not mention it in our baby's own birth announcement - it will be his own.
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We did. Granted, we were never quiet or hesitant to share about our miscarriage. It's common for people in our church to announce pregnancies, and so when we announced for LO we mentioned it. A lot of people told is it was encouraging to hear us talk about, and I've had some really fantastic conversations with people because of it.
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I did not mention it in my announcement.. but my announcement was for twins, so when people asked if twins ran in the family, I would mention my IF journey (high level). It's not a secret for me, but I don't feel the need to shout it out to everyone either
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I've seen it when people announce their "rainbow baby" but I am not comfortable sharing that with everyone. I am pretty open IRL that I have a blood clotting disorder that has caused us problems before having E, but I wouldn't make an announcement of it
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When we get pregnant again, we won't announce our miscarriage to say, Facebook. But a lot of our family and friends know about at least miscarriage #2 if not both, so they all know it's been a tough road.
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Nope! Only a few really close friends of ours even know about it.
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This is definitely a personal choice.
Though I just wanted to say that for every person that does speak up about their journey there are a ton of people that they know that didn't and now feel less alone seeing that someone else went through it. It feels like everyone is going through a battle just private ones.
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@swedishfish: In my non-HB announcement, I posted on my personal blog (which I linked to FB), and I discreetly mentioned a bumpy path to reaching this point with a link to my HB m/c blog post. Can wall you the link if you want to see it. I think if you are open to discussing your m/c, it is totally up to you whether or not to include it.
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I won't announce any future pregnancy on social media, just on here
But when we announce to family it will be earlier than we usually do it and the reason will be in case we have another loss (I'd rather people celebrate my pregnancy even if we lose it again, rather than just mourn it). So I will probably explain that, thus mentioning the miscarriage.
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The people who I wanted to know about my losses knew before I finally got pregnant with a sticky baby. And I didn't announce my pregnancy on FB until a week ago (at 35w), so I didn't feel the need to out myself then. However, if I ever feel the need to address it publicly, I'd be more inclined to say it was difficult, and elaborate privately if someone asks.
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@Weagle: Agreed! So many people talked to us about it after we announced - they were like OMG we can talk about this!!
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I just put it that this baby had been loved and prayed for in our hearts for a long time.....and we were so happy and blessed to announce......
I think that was a way to say it with out saying it....
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I doubt I'd do a pregnancy announcement anyway (I'm not a stationary/announcement kind of person anyway)
But if I did, I probably wouldn't mention it. I don't like to have a lot of attention focused on me, and I feel like announcing a miscarriage would cause more attention.
I've told the people I want to know about the miscarriage.
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Definitely not on social media, but I could see myself telling immediate family and close friends (didn't tell anybody at the time).
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I can't imagine mentioning it specifically on social media. Most people that we want to know about our m/c already do...and would be finding out about a pregnancy in person.
I might allude to it having been a long journey, though...
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We did but only because we were so far along. The day we found out, everyone was expecting a boy/girl announcement, but instead we had to say it was a loss at 20 weeks.
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