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I have a couple friends who kept their maiden names, but both of them gave their children their husband's last name. I think that's the traditional thing to do, although I'm curious if anyone gives the kids the mother's last name.

One of the major reasons I took my DH last name was so our children had the same last name as both of us. I did not want them to ask why "mommy's name was different." And I would not feel right asking my DH to have the kids take my last name and hyphenating was out of the question. (our last name is 11 characters and my maiden name has 7.)

I took my maiden as my middle name (didn't have one before) and took my husband's as my last name.

I've never heard of giving the kids the mother's maiden name. I kept my last name, but our kids have my husband's name. I really love my maiden name so I wanted to keep it, plus everyone knows me in the professional world by my maiden name. My DH kept bugging me about it though, so about 3 years into the marriage I added his name, so although legally I now have two last names (no hyphen), I still about 99% of the time just give my maiden name. The only places I found you must use your full legal name is airline tickets and insurance. Even our house is listed just under my maiden name.

I changed my name. I had an awkward Russian name. Now I have a slightly less awkward Italian name . I didn't feel a whole lot of attachment to my last name. And it was essentially made up - when my great great grand parents had my great grandmother they didn't speak English and told them the last name in Russian, which apparently was "Gardener". It was spelled it phonetically on the birth certificate and my last name was born. A different sibling in that family had the same thing happen and their name was spelled differently!

I also really wanted for all of us to have the same last name. I didn't want a different name than my kids, and I didn't want to argue over who's last name to use. And I didn't want DH to have to have a different last name than his kids. He felt much more tied to his name than I did to mine.

I made my maiden name my middle name and took DH's last name. I wanted us to have the same last name as our LOs and I prefer DH's last name to my maiden name

I had many reasons for keeping my own last name. It's DD's middle name and DH's last name is her last name.

I changed my last name to my husband's, but since I don't have a middle name, I just moved my maiden name to the middle name slot.

@looch: My mom did the same thing - she took her maiden name as her middle name and took her husband (my dad)'s name as her last name.

I just took my husband's last name and our kids all have the same last name. I was happy to do it! I like that we're all one family unit with one last name.

I kept my last name when I got married. DD has my last name as her middle and DH's last as her last, we will do the same for any future children.

I kept my last name because it was already mine and I saw no reason to change it. I didn't care what last name we gave children and neither did DH. We gave DD his last name because it is more of the norm and figured people would be less confused.

My husband took my last name.

He wanted to be rid of the family name of his abusive father (and criminal brother). His father abandoned another family overseas before cutting off all ties with any family and moving to the US with his mother and brother in the early 60s. He was born here a few years later and has no known family other than his mom, dad (now deceased) and brother (completely estranged).

I took my maiden as my middle name and have DHs last name. Above anything it is important to for me to have the same last name as LOs. DH felt super strongly about having his name, so that is what we did. Hyphenating to me is weird and would be a super long last name.

I would like to use my maiden name as a middle name for a future LO, but we will see how that goes.

What we chose to do is two middle names.

My son has a family name for his first name, and it is a tradition in DH's family that the father's first name becomes the son's middle name. I did not change my last name, but felt strongly that I wanted my last name to be a part of our kids' names since we do not have a last name in common.

So my son is Firstname, Middle/DH's name, Middle/Mylastname, DHslastname.

We are expecting a daughter in May and are doing the same since we have a family name for a middle name for her.

I kept my maiden and DS has it for a second middle. My sister and I have the same set up as my mom didn't change her name either

I changed my last name but kept my maiden as a second middle, so I basically just added his on. My major reasons were being ok with changing my last name were:

1. I liked that DH, me, and our kids would all have the same last name.
2. I used to be an academic, and my first initial + maiden name combo was extremely common and references to me were hard to find.
3. The way I thought about it, it was just either my dad's last name or my husband's. It's not like my maiden name was "mine".

That said, I can't stand it when I get mail addressed to me as Mrs. DHFirstName DHLastName. MIL does this all the time. It's like I got totally consumed by DH.

I kept my name and our LOs have DHs last name. I have thought about changing mine so we all share the same last name but I also feel weird about it! I joked with DH that he could choose our LOs first names and I would choose their last name but he didn't take the deal.

@catlady: OMG my MIL does that too!! why???

@catlady: "The way I thought about it, it was just either my dad's last name or my husband's. It's not like my maiden name was "mine".
That said, I can't stand it when I get mail addressed to me as Mrs. DHFirstName DHLastName. MIL does this all the time. It's like I got totally consumed by DH."

I totally agree with what you said. I don't personally tie up my identity in my name so I was fine changing it. It was something that was important to DH and since I didn't care, why not?

But I really don't care what you do. It's a personal decision. I have friends who have changed their names, kept their names, had their husband take their names, both hyphenated their names, both combined their names to something new.

I kept my maiden name for a long time after I got married, I lost my father when I had been married for 2 years and I didn't want to change it because I felt connected to him through my name.

I had DD 2 years after he passed away, and I had still kept my maiden name. It was only after she started talking properly and could say her full name, Firstname Surname, and then when prompted would call me Mummy Surname (i.e. the same as her surname) that I decided I would change it. I realised that the same importance I placed on my surname - the connection to my dad - formed part of my daughter's connection to me. I've only used my husband's surname for a year now, married for almost 9 years.

I love my maiden name-it now is my middle name as I took my husband's last name when we got married. My husband lost his mom when we were first dating, and I do like that she and I are both Mrs. XXXXXX. Although I do miss using my maiden as my last name sometimes, I think it joins us so nicely as a family now that our son is here, and have no regrets about it. My son actually has my mom's maiden name as his middle name, and I've considered using my maiden name for a future child, too.