Hellobee Boards

Wait-- your baby isn't even born yet and she is doing all this?? I'm guessing this is the first grandchild? I'd just let it go, I guess. It does sound really annoying, but she's just excited and it isn't actually hurting anyone. I don't think you would be out of line to mention, say, that not ALL her clothes need to say grandma, but she probably will cool off once the baby is here anything.

My sisters and I always just about being our nephew's favorite aunt-- I really hope we aren't annoying my sister with that! But we do always always know that mom will always be first no matter how much he loves me. (Don't tell my sister, but I'm pretty sure she is the favorite. For now.)

I can see how you feel - if once in a while my family called my baby "my baby" it's one thing, and I'd know it was just said lovingly But ALLLL the time would bug me too!

My MIL always calls DS her baby. It drives me nuts too. She did admit that she needs to stop saying it but she still does. I never say anything though. I am right there with you!

That would freakin' drive me nuts and I would say something, but that's me. Not gonna lie, if you're seriously going to just...sorry in advance for poor word choice..."use" her to keep having her buy you stuff, I'm guessing "her baby" terminology will go along with it.

Since it sounds like she really can't be reasoned with (since you kind of tried to breach the subject with her before), I guess it's either you really want free stuff, grandma basically gets her way (I learned that with our wedding. If someone offers money for something, they will tyyyypically get a say in how it's done!) or you lay boundaries NOW that you and DH are comfortable with, and you buy the rest of your own stuff.

I swear we have the same mother! Every single one of those comments is something my mom has said to me about "her baby." I just let it go b/c it's honestly not worth getting into it with her over something like this. It's not like LO is going to think my mom is actually his mom. And funny enough, the other day when she watched him, it was clear that he knew who his mama was after I left!

Wow that's terrible! The same thing happened to me! When I was pregnant my mom was all over me about caring for DS (she wanted a boy, so she got the gender she wanted too) and giving me stuff and lecturing me. It did not get better after he was born!

For me, after a few months I really had to have an honest talk with my mother. A heart to heart. I had to tell her that it's okay to do things her way and for her to get whatever she wanted for the baby BUT she has to realize that it's okay for us to do things our way too and we have to respect each other's choices. I had to point out that we love DS just as much as she did and we will never do anything to try to harm him in any way, BUT they way we choose to parent might be different than hers and she needs to be okay with that.

I think that's when she realized that she was lecturing too much. She actually has been pretty good at not over lecturing me, which is what I asked. I don't mind her telling me her way I just didn't like her telling me over and over again along with why our way was bad sort of thing.

I should also note that DH and me are in a position where we could potentially restrict interactions between the baby and my mother which we would never do for a number of reasons I mention this because we try really hard to make sure our parents get to hang out with DS and I think my mother knows that we do try our best to give her a lot of time with the baby so that helped our cause also.

Good luck! In your heart you know what's best for you and your family and how to communicate with your mother. Just do your best!