Hellobee Boards

It would bother me and I would let DH know. I don’t expect much; I don’t even really like flowers but please find a way to let me know that you appreciate the fact that I am the mother of your child(ren). Candy, card, any small gesture please ️

No card, but we don't normally give each other cards. If it bothers you, tell him you'd like a card next year. Maybe don't even bring it up right now if you're both frazzled, just at some point before next Mother's Day.

We're both from abroad and have another "Mother's Day" that DH basically didn't think I celebrate since I've lived in the USA most of my life. As it happens, it's a big deal to me, so I told him I do want him to at least say congrats to me. It took a couple of reminders, but it sank in eventually. To be fair, he also gets two Father's Days

My kids are a little older (2.5 and 4.5), so this year my husband kind of organized gifts from them (with his help obviously), and he also let me sleep in, and then he cleaned the whole house all by himself so I could spend time with my girls without worrying about my to-do list over the weekend.

If I remember correctly, my first Mother's Day he also got up early so I could sleep in, and he got me a card from him and a card "from the baby".

I got a small bouquet of flowers. No card or gift or picture from my toddler or really any other small gesture or sentiment throughout the day. I was very upset and spent the day doing laundry and trying not to cry. I had told him several times I would really appreciate a manicure since I hadn’t had one since I took my mom out for last mother’s day. I thought he heard me but I guess it didn’t register. I totally get it. I actually still haven’t outright said anything to him because it’s jist the same argument we’ve had a million times and I don’t want to have it again.

I would say something. It doesn't have to be right away, I'd just make sure to bring it up at some point before next year.

The weekend before I went and got cards to mail our moms, this prompted DH to remember Mother's Day was the next weekend. I told him all I wanted was to not cook that day. I got to sleep in, they made me coffee for when I got up. Then we went out for some fun family time and out for dinner. DS made me a card at daycare.

I generally have had to say something every year in the week or two leading up to the day. But I'd rather do this than be disappointed.

I got handmade presents from all of my kids. Even my 1 year olds. They made them in daycare. So I did not expect anything from my DH as I am not his mother. He doesn't get anything from me on father's day either just from the kids.

But if you expect to be aknowledged on that day by DH and are bugged because you weren't, you should talk to him about it, so he knows what your expectations are. His point of view might be similar to the one I posted above and he can only react to your differing viewpoint if he knows of it.

@cake2017: did he give or do anything besides brunch with your MIL?? if not, then, yes I would be a little hurt for sure.

I did not get a card but I did get flowers and sweet treats. Although I do love getting cards sometimes they feel like a waste to me... but that's just me. DH recognized mother's day which is I think the most important.

If you are unhappy I'd definitely mention it. Men need to be given explicit directions sometimes.

DH failed big time Mothers Day 2017...I took a few days and then let him know. I dont need an ellaborate grand day - but I want acknowledgement.

When I say failed, I mean he did nothing. The kids had made things at school and he took that to be my gift. All day, he just kept saying, its your day whatever you want to do...but in reality he did nothing for me.

I told him, calmly, a few days later. I explained that I just needed something, some acknowledgement - a gesture. Telling me I can pick whatever I want to do still makes me have to organize and plan what we do - which is not relaxing.

This year he took the kids early in the morning out of the house for an hour, I had coffee in bed after I woke up on my own, then he came back (about 30 mins after I woke up) with my fave breakfast. He gave me a card. It was perfect. So I say speak up, calmly and explain yourself as well as you can...

@erinbaderin: Same! Since apparently it has to be expressed directly (sigh) I now say that I would like DW to help DS make me a card ...

Yes you should say something if it bothers you... I can see why you are upset -- it is not that he forgot it was mother's day, he did something special for one mother but not the other... Say something or it will continue to happen in the years to come!

To make you feel better, I learned early on to NOT count on DH to do anything at all on mother's day, because that will be setting myself up for volatile emotions. The past mother's days has been either extremely sweet (he booked a weekend getaway with a yoga class, spa and mother's day brunch) or complete disaster: we fought weeks ahead-- he criticized how I am not nailing it as a good mom and doesn't deserve to celebrate on Mother's day or somewhere along the lines. I booked my own brunch at a mother's day event at the aquarium with another mom friend and our kids. He bought tickets too when it got close, and I basically told him to not even bother to go as I am such a terrible mom that doesn't deserve to be celebrated. That ticket was expensive. Yep. That really happened. On top of that, you know what ridiculousness he said on my first mother's day when DS was a few months old? He said it doesn't count because you have to be a mother for at least a year. ##$@*()%. Haha.

Yes this year I got flowers (nothing fancy, he bought it at Whole Foods) and a neon pink water bottle that says "Best Mom!" which is super tacky but I think DS customized that message with DH. And we went to a fancy dinner. But I won't feel hurt if next year he is traveling and not even be here or anything.

He got me a card and gift. I wasn’t expecting a gift but I’ve made it very clear that I expect cards on holidays. In general, men seem to be pretty bad at cards, I think you should tell him your expectations so he knows exactly what you want. My husband has a wishlist for me that he works from

No - no card. He did bring me very nice flowers though. He tried really hard to make it nice because last year it was not a very good day!

I bet some of the spouses think this is a holiday for moms by their kids. That’s great and all when the kids are older, but for now they need to put in the work. DH was on the phone several times that day urging his sisters to do something special for his mom and checkIng in on his mom. It was annoying especially when I was trying to talk to him, but he made reservations for brunch so I didn’t complain. Although, next year I hope brunch at a restaurant is out of his head since they couldn’t serve alcohol until noon. He was apologetic about that.

I'd say something. For my first mother's day I told my husband I wanted something homemade (meaning something with her hand or foot prints, etc.). I got a card from them and she scribbled a bit in it and that was it. I was really sad and I cried a little by myself about it. He's done better the past two years. This year I got a card from each, candles from him, and two homemade gifts from Emma they made together.

I didn't get a card and never expect to. However I did get a present and day all to my preference, and I would been a little miffed if I hadn't gotten a present or "acts of service."