I've finally admitted to myself and my husband that at least right I think we are one and done so how do I answer everyone's question of when we are going to have the next one?
/rant/ Jack is 3.5 months and we've fielded this question at least a dozen times already and never from our own parents but from extended relatives!
pear / 1650 posts
I usually just am vague and say "well, we'll see what happens...." My LO is 5 months and I get that question a lot too!
hostess / wonderful persimmon / 25556 posts
We just say, "We are pretty happy with our family of three. Unless something drastic happens, we're going to stop with just one." When it's someone close to us - family or close friends - we explain we can't afford maternity leave for me, the cost of the birth and two kids in daycare/private school.
wonderful clementine / 24134 posts
I wouldn't try to answer it until your LO is about a year old otherwise they will just assume its something you are saying because you are in the stressful stage of a newborn.
For now, just say, "IF we think about another they will be very very very far apart".
honeydew / 7504 posts
D is 11 months old and I'm being told he "needs" a sibling. I basically roll my eyes and say, "Oh, well....not for quite a while." Eventually I'll probably get snarky and tell them, "When you pony up for 2 kids in daycare!"
honeydew / 7916 posts
I'm trying to let people know before our one is born! But otherwise I'd love to know how to answer this.
grapefruit / 4923 posts
you could say something to make them uncomfortable, like "we're hoping that tonight's the lucky night! you know what i mean? huh? (wink wink nudge nudge)" or "i just don't think my vagina could take delivering another baby" (even if you had a c-section/adopted/etc. because then you get the added bonus of them being really confused).
apricot / 469 posts
Our LO is almost a year and I'm no spring chicken so we are asked this quite a bit. To friends and family I just smile and say 'one at a time, lets see how this one goes first'.
To strangers they get my one size fits all of 'hmm, why would you ask that?'
The truth is if we do decide to have a second, it won't be for several years putting me into late 30s so we have a lot to weigh.
cantaloupe / 6730 posts
Lol - people ask me that too! What's with that when LO is only 3.5 months old. So, right now, i just give a look of horror and say "maybe never". They don't deserve any kind of real answer now anyways - nosy nellies.
watermelon / 14206 posts
My friend has a 2 year old and a 4 month old and people are asking her when the next one is coming...it's so rude! Let's enjoy the children that are here, shall we?
pomelo / 5678 posts
I would just explore what makes you feel confident.
"Right now one is good enough for me!"
"Right now I am super happy with one little guy!"
"We'll see!"
wonderful pea / 17279 posts
I get this now and I don't even have a LO. This question bothers me more so than "when are you going to have a baby?" I tell people firmly- no smile- "all I want is one, that's it."
GOLD / wonderful pea / 17697 posts
We're not set on just one yet (well, I'm not, but D is...we've left the door open) but for now we can still get away with smiling politely and saying "We're just enjoying having E for now" and changing the subject. I think we'll be able to use it until he's at least 3 before the question gets really persistent.
wonderful cherry / 21504 posts
I hate that question, especially if you are a little older (like in your 30s). If you say we are one and done, I feel like ppl are like, oh, you'll change your mind, just you wait. If you say you are going to think about it later, ppl get all, well you don't have forever you know...
Surprisingly we haven't gotten that question yet, but I know it's coming. I think a generic "let's take it one at a time" is best.
pomelo / 5628 posts
I say straight out that we're done and it usually ends the convo. Thankfully no one has pushed farther.
papaya / 10343 posts
My mom said that people got increasingly hostile with this question to her after my brother was born (we are 8 years apart). By the time he was a few years old she started having people tell her that it was selfish if her to deny him a sibling.
She said at that point she stopped caring about offending people (and it was slightly offensive considering the people she was talking to and their life choices) and started responding: Well I think it is selfish and irresponsible to have a child you have neither the money or the time to raise, so we're sticking with 1 until something changes.
She said that generally shut them up 
wonderful grape / 20453 posts
"Well it's really none of your business, is it?" And leave it at that
pomegranate / 3895 posts
I just tell people we're one and done but that we reserve the right to change our minds. If they push more I say it's an incredibly personal decision and we will base it on what's best for our family.
cherry / 137 posts
I don't have a good response but just wanted to say this makes me so angry when people ask this. How is my uterus your concern?
wonderful pear / 26210 posts
I tell people the truth, that my nerves can not handle a second child.
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