I know a lot of mamas on here have a 2-2.5 year gap, but I'd love to hear from those that have a 3 year age gap! What are the pros/cons? How was your first LO when your second was born?
Knock on wood if all goes well, these 2 will be close to 3 years apart and wondering what to expect...
pineapple / 12566 posts
Mine are almost exactly 3 years apart. It has been really ideal. LO1 was potty trained, STTN, communicating very well and in a twin bed by the time LO2 was born. Once LO2 was here, I felt that it was easy to explain to LO1 that we don't touch or pick up the baby during the newborn phase and now that they are 4 yo and 14 months, they really interact a lot with one another and play together pretty frequently. My older LO always wants to be (a little too) helpful with the younger one, and he does get jealous sometimes, but it really has been a great age gap.
squash / 13764 posts
@lamariniere: yep, FX everything goes well this time...they would be a few days apart!
blogger / pomegranate / 3201 posts
I'll let you know very soon! They will be one month shy of 3 years apart. I've heard from friends that it's a great age gap.
grapefruit / 4066 posts
@lamariniere: now that's what I like to hear 
glad to hear it was a good gap for you! Hoping for the same!
@Mrs. Jacks: eeek good luck!!! How exciting (and nerve wracking I'm sure!) 
@hilsy85: I'm hoping its a good gap...I know quite a few of us in sept/oct will have a 3 year gap!
@mrs. tictactoe: good luck! Yes let us know how it is
nectarine / 2148 posts
On the opposite end of the spectrum, I am 3 years apart from my older brother and think it is a great age gap. We weren't close enough where we had to be involved in everything together, however, it was easy for my parents for us to do things together. I also took on a lot of interests my older sibling had, but we never fought over anything. We always had our own space and always got along great. This could also be due to personality, more so than our age difference.
Overall I grew up with an older sibling who is 3 years older, a younger sibling who is 5 years younger, and a step-sibling who is 6 months older. I think 3 years is ideal and in a perfect world, is what I would aim for in age difference with my LOs.
pineapple / 12234 posts
B and E are 3 years and 1 month apart. It's a really great age gap. B was potty trained, in a toddler bed, could dress himself and put on his shoes by the time E was born. We spent the summer adjusting after E was born and then B started preschool by the time E was 3 months old. He was so, so helpful. B would sing to E when she would cry or he'd grab diapers and outfits for E. He loved feeling needed in that sense. He did well with the adjustment for the most part...there was a time when E was 3 weeks old and he acted out a bit but we did more one-on-one time and dates with just mom or dad and he was back to normal. B and E are really close now. I prefer the 3 year age gap over the 25 month age gap between E and N - I'm more worn out with their age gap. Both wake through the night still and it's just hard (like last night, 7 wake ups between the two).
cherry / 222 posts
I'm following this too! Mine will be 3 years, 3 months apart. I get anxious about it, and it has been such a reflief to read some of these comments. Thank you everyone!
pineapple / 12234 posts
@NovBaby1112: congrats!!! @hilsy85: and congrats to you too!!! Wishing you both a happy and healthy 9 months!
grapefruit / 4066 posts
@Eko: thanks for sharing! That's helpful!
@HLK208: thanks for weighing in! Glad to hear how positive it has been for you thus far. I'm excited about the age gap bc I think M will be a great big helper for me
pomelo / 5660 posts
I have a 2.5 year age gap BUT if I could change it I would do either 3 years or less than 2. Here's why 2.5 years is hard (1) not potty trained (2) hasn't started preschool (3) not able to dress himself (4) very demanding with mommy's tkme (5) doesn't 100% understand gentle hands with baby sister.
pomelo / 5524 posts
I'm really glad to hear a lot of this. As long as this pregnancy works out, our LOs will be a few days shy of 3 years apart.
pomegranate / 3863 posts
Ah, this is very encouraging! We are hoping for a 3-3.5 year gap between our kids. I'm looking forward to DS being potty trained, in a big bed and hopefully *finally* sleeping through the night before we have another! He currently isn't very verbal either (25 months) and can still be quite needy so I can't imagine having another LO right now.
honeydew / 7235 posts
Also glad to read this!! LOs will be 3 years apart! Let's see if I can get my son potty trained this summer. That would be awesome.....
coconut / 8861 posts
I'm liking this thread. My LO's will be almost 3 years apart (by 2 months or so). I talked with one of my friend's mom. When I mentioned the age gap, she said it was awesome between a couple of her kids. She described the 18 month/24 month age gap between her two eldest as useless because the kids were in diapers still and couldn't help with the new baby. By 3, she said that the kids are much more helpful with the babies.
My first LO is potty trained (day trained), can put on clothes with some assistance, and has an independent streak where he wants to pull down his pants for potty and take off his shirt. Hopefully in a few more months, his abilities to dress himself will improve.
hostess / papaya / 10219 posts
Hoping to get KU soooon (!) and mine would be about 3 years apart. We had been trying for a 2 year age gap but it hasn't happened. Now I am thinking it may be a silver lining.
wonderful kiwi / 23653 posts
Good to know! Just had my first but I want at least a 3 year gap too
grapefruit / 4066 posts
@BandDmommy: good to know, thanks for sharing! Hopefully it'll be easier as they get older
@hellobeeboston: we are going to try to potty train over the spring/summer too! Hoping they do well! M isn't showing any signs yet but I'm hoping by summer she will!
Thanks everyone for sharing stories so far!
apricot / 315 posts
This thread makes me feel better - we were aiming for a 2-2.5 yr age gap, but since life has other plans, it will be closer to 3-3.5. Sounds like it might be even better!
pomegranate / 3331 posts
i'm hoping for a 3 year age gap (eventually), and this thread makes me feel really good about it i definitely think it's nice that the older one can help out!
@hilsy85: eek congrats! 
wonderful clementine / 24134 posts
I agree with everything @lamariniere: has said.
3 years has been about as perfect as I could have asked for.
Oldest child
- potty trained
- sleeps through the night (mostly)
- fairly self sufficient (can get dressed or at least go get her clothes, can hold hand or stand on sidewalk in a parking lot, etc).
- Follows directions
Additionally she's still young enough to want to play with baby toys (stacking blocks, etc) and is ok with quiet activites that a baby can do like swing, etc. We aren't hauling a baby around to sit at soccer practices, etc.
cantaloupe / 6669 posts
I like this thread too. If we have another, it will definitely be a 3-3.5 year age gap. We are just not ready/interested right now. I also can't imagine essentially two babies at once. Having an older "helper" sounds like fun! Plus, no matter my work situation at that point, LO will definitely be in preschool so I can focus on LO2.
cantaloupe / 6669 posts
@T.H.O.U.: That's a good point about the "sweet spot" before soccer practices and all that!
coconut / 8861 posts
@Chaosmaven: For us, it was life having other plans before firming down a pregnancy with a 3 year age gap. I have to say that 1-2 years was a lot of fun, so we enjoyed it with LO before having the impending nature of another kid.
pomegranate / 3275 posts
My oldest and youngest are more like 3 and a half years to 4 years apart. It was nice! DD understood what it means to be "gentle" and could help with things like getting diapers etc. I could see how 3.5-4 year age gap would be really easy!
pomelo / 5469 posts
I 
this thread. Sometimes on here I feel like one of the only few who is going to have greater than a 2 year age gap between my kids!
Our plan has always been to aim for close to 3 years, give or take a few months. My Sister and I are 3 years and 3 months apart and were inseparable growing up, though despite this I get a lot of comments from people telling me to hurry up with #2 or they won't get along 
cantaloupe / 6086 posts
I am almost exactly 3 years younger than my brother so it was my example. My mom highly recommended it. Ours are now almost exactly 3 as well. I love it. I watch videos of her at 2 and can't imagine that now even though we started trying a lot closer to that. I don't know if having a girl makes a difference too (for older one) but she's so grown up and capable. Extremely verbal and really understands everything I say. Can follow very complex instructions and be a real helper. Mostly able to be patient while I am nursing etc. #1 is in 2 day mdo which helps too (if you will sah or WAH).
I agree 2 years ish is so the trend where I live (maybe all over, maybe because we tended to start later?) but I'm now thinking if we ever have #3 I will hope for this again even though I'm getting older.
persimmon / 1339 posts
Yay, so happy to read this. If we decide not to stop at one (under great debate at the moment), then want at least a 3 year age gap, hopefully closer to 4. My sister and I are 3yrs 8 months difference and although we hated each other in elementary school, as soon as she was in high school we had a great relationship that continues to this day. Day care is so stupid expensive here that we can't afford to have 2 in at once, and I mentally cannot stay at home with 2 So ideally my son would be in pre-k or kindergarten when the second arrives. I also DO NOT want to be changing 2 sets of diapers at once! Or change diapers in the throes of morning sickness!
All of this is really confirming our decision 
pomegranate / 3314 posts
Mine will be right about three years apart, so this thread is super encouraging!
pear / 1672 posts
Liking this as well. If we move forward with #2, we'll have about a 3-3.5 year gap.
grapefruit / 4085 posts
Also glad to hear all the positives. I personally wasn't ready and couldn't see myself with a 2 yr old and newborn so we are aiming for the 3 yr age gap too
pear / 1639 posts
Love this thread! We're aiming for close to a 3 year age gap based on the fact that I have an awesome relationship with my sister who is 3 years older and the one 3 years younger, I think it'll work out well!
cantaloupe / 6669 posts
@illumina: I have never understood that. I have known siblings that fight like cats & dogs that are close in age, and farther apart. I don't think that has a lot to do with it.
| Today | Monthly Record | |
|---|---|---|
| Topics | 0 | 0 |
| Posts | 1 | 0 |
Ask for Help
Make a Suggestion
Frequently Asked Questions
Bee Levels
Acronyms
Most Viewed Posts
Hellobee Gold
Hellobee Recipes
Hellobee Features
Hellobee Contests
Baby-led Weaning
Bento Boxes
Breastfeeding
Newborn Essentials
Parties
Postpartum Care Essentials
Sensory Play Activities
Sleep Training
Starting Solids Gear
Transitioning to Toddler Bed
All Series
Who We Are
About the Bloggers
About the Hostesses
Contributing Bloggers
Apply to Blog
Apply to Hostess
Submit a Guest Blog
Hellobee Buttons
How We Make Money
Community Policies
- Google Plus
- Stumbleupon
- Twitter
- Facebook
- Pinterest
- Favorite1
53 comments