Hellobee Boards

My 4.5 year old DS came home from school last week having cut a zig zag pattern at the bottom of the sleeves of one of his shirts. Just like 4 little triangles missing from the end of the fabric. I didn't notice until he'd been home a while so I don't think his teachers noticed it at all. We had to have a talk about how that's not okay - he just thought he was making his shirt cool.

Wasn't my kid... It was me 🤦‍♀️

My little sister was born when I was 23 months old. They brought her home from the hospital at less than 24 hours old, I punched her in the head and stopped walking for a month.

@irene: I still wasn't walking at my 2 year check 🤦‍♀️

My parents legitimately thought there was something wrong since I was holding out for so long. The doctor was checking my hips and legs, asked his the baby was, then told me and my parents that there was nothing wrong with me and I needed to start being a helper.

Also not my kids but shortly after my grandma came home with baby #4 she found him in the trash can. She never figured out which older brother put him there.

@irene: I went to that show when LO2 was a baby. It was a Friday so I took the train from work and met a friend for a rare night out. The bouncer searched my bag and stopped me at the door. He looked at my pumped breast milk and said I couldn't bring it in. I felt so out of touch when I realized I just tried to bring breast milk into a night club. As I was taking a second to process the disconnect between my desire to not dump my milk and the bouncer trying to do his job the line of women behind me jumped to my defense. That poor bouncer. That was not the crowd to challenge on breast milk. Thankfully we quickly agreed to put my bag in coat check and there was no revolt.

I don't have anything too crazy involving my son, but my sister and I have some good ones. When my sister was about three or four, she jumped into the pool for my mom to catch her, but somehow her teeth got my mom on the forehead. Sister was fine, mom had to get stitches...

As for me, when I was four and my sister was two, apparently she was driving her tricycle around the house, and I opened our front door so she drove right out onto the porch and down the stairs...oops! Luckily she didn't get injured much beyond a bad cut on her lip.

Omg, and I just remembered that my husband and his twin sister were terrified of their cabbage patch dolls, so they threw the dolls into the oven and turned it on! hahaha

Not my LO but my brother.

He was 4 or 5 and my Dad just had his vasectomy and my brother punched him in the balls hard when he got mad at him. I vaguelly remember it but my dad has never let my brother forget.

@Portboston: my 3 year old locked herself in her bedroom- it’s not an actual key but it was a turn lock, not the push type that is easier to pop from outside. DH was able to use a screwdriver to take the entire knob off while I stuck my fingers under the door to calm her down. We immediately put a knob cover over that doorknob and tape over the hole so she can’t lock it again before we buy a new doorknob without a lock. But hers was just fooling around, not an intentional jerk thing to do.

Not my toddler but my sister. When she was about 5 she cut her bangs off and went as far as to tell our mom a specific child at school did it! She finally relented when our mom picked up the phone to call the other child’s parents. But here’s the best part. She still has the bag of hair....

My brother used to try to flush the cat down the toilet, my parents caught him more than once shoving her in. Oh, and also one time - so we had an alarm on the house, and my mom has to set the alarm at the front door and then run to the back door to get out. One day she ran to the back door, stuffed her feet in her boots, and realized my brother had filled her boots with water.

@irene: he wasn’t in it! He locked it and shut the door from the hallway. Intentionally locking us all out. Little shit!!!

@irene: So we rent a pretty old house. The knob to our boys room would randomly get stuck but if you jiggled it a little bit it would eventually open... until it didn't. I went to check on the boys before I went to bed and I couldn't get in their room! Of course the screws to take the knob off were on the inside of the room. Luckily I had left their window open a bit so I could climb in from the outside. I tried opening the door from the inside but nothing was working. We took the knob off and still couldn't open it. I even took the pins out of the hinges and still couldn't get the door off! I ended up waking the kids up, handing them to DH through the window and they slept in our room.

Our landlord came over the next morning and had to drill through the metal parts of the closing mechanism to get it off.

@misolee: omg I am DYING 🤣🤣🤣🤣 too funny but I do feel bad for the 2 year old!!!

Oh, I just remembered a story from a family I babysat as a kid. They had 2 older girls and a boy and when I went to babysit one night I got told the youngest was being punished because he had cut the hair off all his sisters' American Girl dolls (they had 2 each) and peed on all their (the dolls) clothes. I cannot even imagine how angry I would be if my child did that...

@irene: my husband was ready to kick the door in! He was panicking and I'm like dude, the kids are asleep. Lets not traumatize them by kicking in the door. The window is open so I can crawl through. My oldest doesn't even remember me waking him up to crawl through the window and the baby didn't wake up at all!

This thread just keeps getting more amazing. On the note of weird things in boots: one of my adorable angel children took their apple juice box with a straw in it and mostly full and stuck it in my boot. When I stuffed my foot in it the next morning, I squish the box sending apple juice right up my pants and soaking the inside of my boot

DH was about 4 or 5 and was pushing his younger sister in a stroller at the grocery store. Somehow he switched strollers with someone who had a little boy. MIL didn't notice until they were at the car and said "This isn't my child." She went back to the store and the manager told everyone to check to make sure that they had the right child. Of course, no one did. 10 minutes or so later, another mother runs to customer service about not having the right child. They switch strollers and everything is fine. MIL wonders if she would be arrested if this happened now.