Hellobee Boards

I voted twice. My relationship with my brother is highly supportive; we don't necessarily talk or text all the time, but we're in each other's top 5 people to tell news to (I have no doubt that he's my ride or die).

My relationship with my 2 step-sisters (our parents have been together for almost 20 years) is the mediocre one. I'm a DEVOTED auntie to the younger's kids, which made us closer for a time, but we both stepped back from the relationship a few years ago. The older I used to have a bad relationship with, but it has gotten 10000x better in the last 5 or so years.

I'd love to have a close relationship with all my siblings, but that's not really what my step-sisters want, so I'm not going to waste headspace on it. For now, I'm pretty comfortable with where we all are.

For the record, my DH is very close with his siblings, too. His twin is over at our house at least once a week, and his sister got a job at my work via my referral last year.

My sister (3 years older than me) and I are very close. We both live in the same city, a few hours away from where we grew up. We get together weekly for coffee or a walk to catch up. I would really consider her my closest friend.

We always got along pretty well growing up and played together well, but I would say we are closer now that we are adults.

I am one of 5 siblings and I voted for the top two. My older sister is truly one of my best friends. We are extremely supportive of each other, first to tell news or deal advice from. Unfortunately she lives 4 hours away so we don’t see each other as much as we would like but I’m really trying to make it happen more especially as our kids are getting a little bigger. I really really really hope my two girls have as close of a relationship as we do.

My brother is 5 years older than me and we aren’t as close, don’t talk all the time but are definitely still important to each other. I’d say we are between mediocre and stellar? If he came to my state he would make sure to visit. My youngest sister I’m very close to and we support each other. I’d say option one.

It’s my other sister I’d give a mediocre rating to. We can be close but she is just really hard to get along with and I have to step back sometimes. I want the best for her but I have to limit my time with her to preserve our relationship.

Overall I feel really lucky that my siblings and I genuinely like each other and want to see each other. And my mom has said more than once how that more than anything makes her feel good as a parent.

ETA: oh and my older sister and I lived together for four years after college, only splitting up because I loved to be in the same city as my boyfriend (now husband)! Our apartment was a total mess all the time but best roommate ever.

My sister is 22 and I'm 26. We were not close growing up and I think it's just because we have such different personalities.
We get along fine now but live in different states which has a big impact on our relationship (or lack of). She's a good person and I love her but like I said above we are just totally different people

I didn't vote because none of the options really fit - I see my brother at Christmas and maybe one other time a year at a special event, but that's it. We live in different states, and he's a workaholic and bad at communicating, so even if I reach out, it'll be a few weeks before I get a response (if I get one at all.) But it's not hostile and it's not no relationship at all - maybe mediocre is the best option, but it feels a little less than mediocre also, haha.

@cat620: Very similar to your husband. Occasional texting. Will see sister one time when she’s in town but we are never the reason she comes to town if that makes sense. Other sister local and maybe see her five times a year. TBH it’s a big part of why I don’t believe I “have to” give DS a sibling. You are not guaranteed a close relationship.

My sister is 6 years older. We weren't close growing up. But now, I don't know what I would do without her. I'm so happy I have two girls.

My sister and I were very close growing up and are even closer now, even though we live over 3,000 miles apart. We text constantly and see each other as much as we can.
DH, on the other hand, is not close with his sisters at all. His sisters are close to each other though. He is the middle child. They text very rarely and never call each other. I think it’s sad.

My sister and I text most days, although we live really far apart and rarely see each other, so we're pretty close.

My husband has 3 siblings and they're cordial but he doesn't talk to them very often. They all live far away.

I’m one of four and we all get along really well and love spending time together. One sibling lives far away but the other two are pretty local. My sister is one of my best friends but right now we don’t talk/text as we once did bc life and she’s in a different stage with a bit older kids. Even so, we see each other at least once a month and then a ton in the summer.

I don’t really talk to any of my siblings on the phone but we FaceTime for birthdays and having running family text chains.

Having grown up in a big family, my LOs have cousins so that means I am content stopping at two bc they will have other close family!

I have one brother, a year and a half older, who lives 45 minutes away. We were hostile growing up and got closer in college. He started dating a woman that I really liked in college and eventually we alternated having kids. I was closer to my SIL than my brother. Last year they got divorced and SIL moved further away with the kids. At his best my brother is really hard to connect with. Newly single, lonely, and depressed has made it much harder. I want to connect with him more but all his free time is spent working or driving to see his kids (obviously the right choice). He agreed to go camping with us this summer and I'm hoping we can make some connection then.

My older sister (2y5m older) and I fought like crazy until we were in our mid twenties 🤦‍♀️ she knew how to push my buttons and enjoyed it. Now we're not super close, but text and Marco Polo regularly 🤷‍♀️

My younger sister (23m younger) were on and off growing up, since she was the swing vote in a family of 3 kids. Now that we're older we're really close. She lives down the road from me, we see each other and talk/text daily. She's probably one of my closer friends.

I have typed and erased at least three times. But I'll say it's really complicated. I have two half sisters from my dad's second marriage but they are 10 and 13 years younger than I am. We get along, see each other roughly once a month, and text a few times a month. Nothing is weird when we are together but that's because we all pretend their mother doesn't hate me or that I wasn't around for the first 12ish years of their lives. So I don't know if we will ever be truly close.
I also have four step siblings from my mom's second marriage, but she got married when I was 27 so I don't have a real relationship with them. We are friendly when we see each other and will occasionally comment on facebook/instagram posts but that is about it.

DH has a brother that he loves and they would do anything for each other. But they aren't friends and they don't talk regularly. They just have nothing in common and DH doesn't agree with the majority of the life choices his brother has made. He also has two step siblings but he was 22 when his mom remarried. They are friendly and we have fun when we see them. But DH doesn't go out of his way to stay in touch or form a relationship.

I have 3 siblings—one full, one step, and one half—and I’m really close with one, situationally close with one, and no relationship with the third.

The sibling that I ended the relationship with is 2 years older, and it just wasn’t healthy. I kept putting in effort and feeling like I was the only one. It was kind of similar to the relationship you’re describing. For example, when I was living in Chicago she came out from NY to visit a friend and didn’t even tell me she was going to be around until she was already in town. She did some really terrible things around my wedding, possibly because she was upset her younger sister was getting married first. I told her we could go to therapy or I was out. She wasn’t open to therapy—literally told me she didn’t see a problem with our relationship so it was on me to fix any issues I had. But she’s also the person who responded, “well I thought you didn’t want kids anyways,” when she found out about my miscarriage at Thanksgiving year before last as it was happening.

I’m very close with my half sister, but we didn’t really grow up together. She’s 13 years younger, and we didn’t really bond until she was a teenager, but now that she’s in her 20s we text every day.

My step brother is the one I’m situationally close with. He’s 6 years younger, and we don’t really talk on the phone or text much, but we’re great friends/drinking buddies when we’re both in the same place.

It all goes to show that you never know with family.

Our relationship is cordial, but for various reasons I don't think it could ever be close. My sibling is very rigid/socially conservative - it goes along with the environment we were surrounded by growing up - and ultimately I just feel so judged. The world view is very anti-science, very believe this because so-and-so authority figure says, I know the way and others don't.... and is just such a value clash with the principles I hold most dear.

I feel like my siblings relationships are kind of odd. I'm one of 6 kids and although our parents are the same, we are realllllly far apart in age. My oldest brother is 21 years older than my younger sister. I'm number 5.

So I'm not all that close to the oldest 2, just because they are so much older than me and I was probably 5 and 7 when they each moved out of the house (and one immediately moved cross country, so we never even lived in the same state for the rest of my growing up years). I consider them more like young aunts/uncles that I see 1x every other year. We have almost nothing in common in terms of lifestyle, religion, political affiliation. And I would never just like, pick up the phone to gab with either of them.

I'm closer to the last 4, but we are really scattered around the US (I'm in NYC area, one sister is in GA, brother in Dallas but has a job where he travels constantly, and 1 sister in LA), so we just don't see each other much. Plus my younger sister struggles with severe mental illness, so I would never talk to her about my 1st world type of problems. We have like, a family text thread that we revive about every other week to talk about stuff. And my 2nd oldest sister and younger sister are people I will text random pics of my kids to, because they are more involved. Anyway, so we are not super close, but definitely more close than I am with my oldest sibs.

TLDR: Not close at all with 2 sibs. Close, but kind of hands-off with my other sibs because of geographical distance.

I voted for the top two. I have a sister (two years younger) and a brother (four years younger). I have positive relationships with both siblings but I'm much closer with my sister. We text daily and she lives about ten minutes away so we see each other often. My relationship with her is what makes me so excited to be having a second girl. I love that my daughter will have a sister and I hope they will be close (although I know I can't guarantee that). My relationship with my brother is fine - we're not especially close but it's a positive relationship and we get along well.

@pachamama: I know, me too. But it is somewhat comforting to see too. Sometimes I feel like a failure for not fostering the “my sister is my bestie we do everything together” relationship. I tried. We were/are different. But it’s nice to know I’m not alone.

I love my brother dearly but he doesn't care about me at all. There is no hostility, he just doesn't put in any effort. He hasn't met my kids. We text some. I haven't seen him in over 4 years. He doesn't come to Christmas and we don't do Thanksgiving together. I really try, but I don't think we would ever be close. I used to cry about it but I'm too run down with everything else in my life to worry about it daily.

@pachamama: I'm surprised but it sort of makes me feel better about my own sibling relationship!