For those of you who have had children, did your husband or partner go with you to all of your visits or just your visits with ultrasounds? Were there any visits in particular when they definitely should be there?
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The ONLY visit my husband came to was the 19-week ultrasound, where we were told the probable gender of our baby and were able to see different shot of her. He didn't come to any other ultrasound appointment or OB appointment only because I felt there was no real need. After ever visit, I just called him at work and gave him the update. I think the 19-week ultrasound is significant because you get to see what the two of you created...And it no longer looks like a "blob"...But more like a real baby. :o)
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i don't have children yet - they're just buns right now. but my husband came to a few (not all) of mine. he came to the first one that confirmed our pregnancy. to the 7-week one where we got our first u/s picture and heard the heartbeat and week week 11, with the new doctor.
i think the 2 that your husband should be there is for the NT scan at week 12 (if you decide to get one) and the week 20, where you can find out the sex.
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He's gone to the appointments where we knew for sure we were having an ultrasound and the last few weekly ones before we deliver just to get comfortable with the Dr and ask any questions he has.
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Hubs was at the first US, and then the first doctor appointment (when we got to meet our perinatal dr). The perinatal dr told us that we were likely miscarrying in the next few days/weeks, and so hubs went with me to both follow-ups (that week and next), but not the follow up post MC.
When we get our BFP next, I'll go to the clerk appt, and any diabetic appts, but he'll be there for the first US and first dr appt for sure. His schedule allows him to come to most if I schedule the appts for relatively early or end of day.
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DH came to all my appointments with my first pregnancy. I was really sick and needed him to drive me and he worked from home at the time.
Now he is a SAHD and only came to ultrasounds (I had at least 6 this time for different areas of concern--all was well in the end) for my second pregnancy. My OB mentioned that it's pretty to common for dads to come to any combination of appointments.
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Only the 20 week ultrasound. He asked about coming to others but I declined. For me, the prenatal check-ups felt like _my_ check-ups, and having DH along felt somewhat invasive.
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He only went to the 20 week us. He had planned on going to the 12 week one, but something came up last minute.
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We went to all our midwife appointments together. He went to all of LO's doctors appointments until she turned 1, and now he just does the yearly visits. I think, for him, it helped him feel more connected to the pregnancy & baby. I loved the my midwife taught him how to feel the baby's position, and even how to listen to baby's heartbeat through my belly (she was in a prime position for this).
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DS1, he came to first 3 OB (I think) appts and first 2 ultrasounds (NT and anatomy)
DS2, he came to the anatomy scan only.
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With DS he came to every appointment except my 3hr glucose test, and then he dropped me off and picked me up.
With DD he came to my first prenatal, and every ultrasound except one (that my mom came to)...and I had a lot of them (I honestly lost track after 10).
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@mediagirl: With our first, he came to every single appointment. We had a high risk pregnancy after 3 years of trying so he wanted to be there for all of them so we went out of our way to schedule all the appointments at times that worked for his schedule.
This time, he's only been to a handful between our toddler and because this pregnancy seems to be pretty normal and uneventful, but not because he doesn't want to be there. I just haven't been as picky about scheduling things to ensure my husband is there.
I would say the first few appointments (i.e. when you're in the MC zone and wouldn't want to get bad news alone) and the anatomy scan are ones I would want DH to be there for.
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only one- the anatomy scan appointment. There's no way that he would've been able to make it to appointments on the regular, and I didn't feel the need to have him there.
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Mine went to all of my appointments. He even stayed with me for my 3hr glucose test.
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First LO he came to every appointment. This pregnancy he's only come to ultrasounds, but mostly because I schedule the appointment times to what's convenient for me.
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With our first he went to 50% of the appointments, and definitely made the early ones and the gender/anatomy scan at 20 weeks. He also went anytime I had to have blood drawn since I've passed out at a few blood draws.
This time he's gone less because he's busier at work, but I really don't mind since my appointments are SO fast and I'd rather save the time off for when the baby is here. But he's still made all the big appointments and will likely go the last few weeks, too.
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DH came to all appointments with all 3 pregnancies, he didn't want to miss out on any info as I had a quick scan every time I saw my OB.
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First baby--every single appointment.
Second baby--first appointment and anatomy scan. He was willing to come to more, but it was easier for everyone to make appointments at the office close to my work at times that were convenient for me. I called him with updates, but it was a very uneventful pregnancy.
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He's been to every appointment so far. But I also kind of make him because I need to take an elevator to get to the Drs office and I'm terrified to take it alone! Haha.
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@mediagirl: With DD he went to all, but now with #2 if it is a quick check up I can see just jetting here after work or before and I would be OK with him not there!
With DD I was already so affriad something would be wrong and needed his support! -
With our first, I think like 90%. He was out of town once, and some other days just can't get an appt where we're both free. Also towards the end, since I had GD, I needed to do the monitoring for like 45 min so I told him not to come.
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Because I'd had a miscarriage before, he came to a couple early ones with me to keep me calm. He also came to all ultrasounds (except one he was out of town for, so my dad came--it was hilarious) and then to the last few weekly appointments from 36-39 weeks.
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DH came to a majority of the visits- everun ultrasound visit and every checkup w/ just heartbeat monitoring except for one b/c we didn't know HB was happening that day. He didn't come to any GD tests or just routine blood work appointments.
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All the ultrasounds and most of the appointments at the end (the once a week appts in the last month).
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All appointments with both
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My husband has come to all my appointments. There were two where he had to stay in the waiting area with our other two kids. It helps that he's his own boss so his schedule is pretty flexible.
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