So long story short we have been ttc conceive for about a year now. After nine long months of no success I was shocked to find out I was pregnant. We were both overjoyed and nervous. I had pretty bad ms right away and felt pretty cruddy for about a week. One morning I woke up and had begun to feel better which was a welcome relief. Unfortunately about four days later I began to spot and discovered my beta had dropped to 5(considered not pregnant) which of course meant I had miscarried.
We were both devastated but it hit me particularly hard. I was very sad and had a tough time recovering both mentally and physically. After a few months break I thought maybe we could try again. I wasn't 100% ready but figured I never would be and since it took nine months last time I assumed I had time to get used to the idea. Well shock of all shocks it took one time and I am pregnant again.
I am now five weeks and am having a tough time not fearing having a miscarriage constantly. My OB was sweet and let me test my beta to give me some assurance that everything was ok. My numbers were quite solid and doubled within 48 hours just like they should but I still find myself worrying. To make matters worse I was again really sick to begin with and now have practically no ms. I am trying my best to handle my nerves and recognize that this is out of my hands but overall I just feel crappy and scared and protective over getting too excited.
Anyone else had to deal with this? How did you cope and overcome your fear? I want to enjoy being pregnant but instead I worry all the time....