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I'm sorry you are dealing with that kind of stress. I know I want my mom to support me and respect me as the adult I am and the independent woman she raised and yet I am always disappointed when she doesn't. In regard to your mom inviting people to the hospital to visit, let your nurse know you don't want visitors and your nurse can then play the bad guy. Unfortunately, other than repeatedly telling her your wishes, you can't control what she does. You can, however, control how much of it immediately effects you, like allowing visitors in your room. I too refused visitors at the hospital and sent out an email once my son was born to those that might be tempted to visit that we would let them know once we were ready to receive visitors at home.

Wow. I don't think the gentle approach is working. She's being very aggressive so you might have to be to. I would try to set boundaries now, as it only gets worse when the baby comes.

I think it does get easier to do when the baby is here though because your "mama bear" comes out and you're doing it for your baby's own good. I had to actually rip my lo out of my mom's arms once because it was bed time and she was screaming and she just does bed time better with me. My mom didn't want to let her go.. but I wasn't going to sit back and watch her scream all night!

Good luck!

To be honest, I think Adira's suggestion might be the best. Tell her that if she cannot respect your wishes, then you won't tell her when you are in labor, or which hospital you are at.

i'm afraid you'll have to be more straightforward and less gentle. i think it's sweet that she's so excited. is this her 1st grandchild?

i hope her boss is a woman! not sure why she wants to discuss all your info with her boss unless they're friends.

I get that you don't want to hurt your mom's feelings, but I still feel like you need to say something because this is a time when you, your hubby, and baby come first as a family. Yes your mom is excited to be a Grandma, but that doesn't mean her wants and wishes should come before yours.

Maybe you can try explaining your reasoning. I know I was pretty terrified to tell my mom she wasn't allowed to see my baby until at least an hour after she was born because I wanted to do skin on skin and have family bonding time before everyone came and scooped her up and held her. Of course my mom was very anxious waiting, but she understood.

Oh, and my mom kept bugging me about when she could post I was preggo on Facebook. I feel for you!

I think it's a good idea telling her that you'll limit the info you give her if she's not going to respect your wishes.
Also, use your doctor or nurse at the hospital as your advocate. It's one thing for you to say that you don't want visitors. It's another if your nurse tells your mother "Absolutely no visitors today-- the new mom is exhausted. I'll let you know about tomorrow, but if anyone shows up to visit, I will be turning them away." Most nurses are very willing to help the new mother's wishes be heard.

We didn't tell anyone (except my Dad) near us that we were at the hospital until after Wombat was born because we didn't want anyone around while I was in labor. It's a good thing too because his mom started drivng when he called her to tell her Wombat was almost here. She got in her car, a 3 day drive for her, and started driving. She got to us in less than 2 days and she wasn't supposed to be coming until 10 days later.