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I personally disagree with the idea that we don't control our weight gain. I think that with proper caloric intake and good exercise, it's totally possible to gain the appropriate amount, whatever that is for your starting weight.

Have you tried tracking your calorie intake? I know from experience how easy it is to eat more than I'm meaning to. If you search around, you should be able to find suggested calorie guidelines for your weight and gestational age. I personally shot for 300 over normal (so 2300) in my second trimester, with as much healthy fat as I could manage. I also make sure to eat back calories that I've exercised off.

I understand how hard it can be to do all this. When you work long hours, you have food aversions, you're sick and tired - it's an awful lot to worry about. So don't beat yourself up if you struggle - but do know that there's a lot you can do, when you can do it.

@bluestriped bee: my midwife told me 10 pounds by 20 Wks, so maybe yours is twin related.

@mrscobee: as lkmg as you are eating healthy and working out, it's fine. Has your OB said anything?

I gained all but about 3 lbs of my pregnancy weight in the second semester. I gained nothing til 12 weeks, then gained almost 30 lbs in the next 12 weeks, then only 3-4lbs in my last trimester, I think my stomach got too small to eat enough to gain weight! Don't stress - eat lots of fruit and veggies, drink lots of water, be active & you'll be fine!

I think as long as you are eating reasonably well and staying reasonably active, there is not much you can do! If you're not eating well or not active, then you can change those things! But I wouldn't actively diet during pregnancy.

@mrscobee: I'm sure it's a factor! For being up about 45, I definitely don't look like I've packed on a ton of extra weight, and aside from some swelling (i'm 38 weeks!), it's all in my stomach (and chest, heh), which is measuring exactly where it should be. I think there's a big difference between someone who's 5'2" gaining 40 pounds and someone who's almost 6 feet tall gaining 40! Also depending on where you were before you got pregnant....I just think there are a ton of factors that come into play, and if you're not stuffing your face with bon bons and chips all the time....then you only have so much control!

But don't feel too hopeless

@mrscobee: same thing happened to me, I didn't gorge myself and while I wasn't super active with my first pregnancy, I am tall, on the slim side for my height and put on almost 40 lbs.

This time around, I am way more active (gymming 2x a week and just active all around), eating well/less than last time and I've still managed to put on 20 lbs at 26 weeks. And that's only because I'm trying really hard to be conscious of my weight gain.

I carried really small as far as my bump the first time and this time is shaping up to be the same. No one believed(s) me on how much weight I've put on, but I really think that my body just needs the 30-40 lbs of weight gain all over during pregnancy.

Don't fret! I lost all the weight after my first and a few pounds through regular eating well and exercise!

@Mrscobee @Mrsjyw I am similar... I am 22 weeks right now, I am 5'9'' and pre-preg I was borderline underweight (BMI about 18). I have gained about 15 lbs so far, and although I have definitely had a few more treats, overall I have eaten pretty healthy, plus I walk 2-3 miles at least 4x a week (well, after the first trimester when I was sick). I didn't gain ANYTHING until I was about 15 weeks.... so I have gained 15 lbs in a pretty short amount of time.

My OB hasn't said a word to me so I guess it's okay?! I am a little afraid to ask. Like you guys, I'm so tall and I think I still look pretty slender. I am feeling a little stressed about it, I think because pre-preg I just assumed because I have always been thin and it's just my body type that I'd gain like 20-25 lbs in pregnancy and that's clearly not going to be the case for me.

I am trying to remember that my body is going to do what it's going to do, and as long as I'm eating relatively healthy and staying active, that's really all I can do. Maybe I need to gain more because I was so thin before and my body is saying that it needs some extra fat stores to be prepared for baby and BFing, I dunno. It is really hard mentally though! Right now at 22 weeks I weigh more than I ever have in my life and that's tough!

I gained almost all of my weight during the second trimester and worried it would be too much but it slowed down a lot. I ended up gaining about 35 lb and lost it all by 6 wks PPand have actually lost more because I'm struggling to keep up with all the extra calories LO is nursing out of me!

I gained the most weight during 2nd trimester too. I think it slows down after. I ended up having GD so I actually ended up losing weight by 3rd trimester and barely gaining anything.

There really isn't a standard... I had a tall & skinny friend gained almost 60 I didn't even see where the weight was though!

How do you know if weight gain is due to an increase in fat rather than an increase in, say, amniotic fluid or the size of the placenta? Weight isn't monitored here during pregnancy so this is new to me...

@miramira: I try to notice day by day - if I've gained 3 pounds this morning (true), that's not fat, because that's just physically impossible. So I wonder, did I get enough water, did I exercise, did I get too little fiber yesterday, am I constipated? Etc etc. This morning I knew that I'd had way too little fiber yesterday, my ring felt a little tight, so I know to dial that up today. I also go by how things like tall boots fit around my calves.

Everyone's body is just so different. If your OB isn't concerned, I wouldn't worry at all.

@mrscobee: My excessive pregnancy hunger is usually a desire for fat - which is fun to fulfill. If I tend to that (instead of just eating more carbs or something), I eat less overall.

I think so much of it depends on what your body needs. Sure, they say "25-35 lbs is preferred," but if you eat right and stay physically active, that's pretty much all that's in your control! As long as you haven't doubled your calorie intake or started eating fast food every day, and you make sure to stay active, I am sure everything is fine. Just trust your body!

I was on bed rest the entire second half of my first pregnancy and I basically had the activity level of a sloth due to PIH and then pre-eclampsia. I was like a slug, and I ate a lot of crap, too. And I only gained 29 lbs! Then, with my second, I was pretty active, still working out, chasing around a toddler, and I gained pretty much the same (26 lbs). That's just what my body needs for pregnancy.

Good luck, sounds like you're doing great.

ETA: Have you changed your eating habits at all?

I have also been eating half an avocado a day which does wonders for the hunger!

@mrscobee: I know that given the chance, I'll just keep grabbing handfuls of goldfish until I've probably eaten 500 calories without even thinking about it. Or if I'm trying, I'll have an english muffin with real butter and a bunch of strawberries, and then I'll feel full. It's easy to go overboard with out meaning to when we're so hungry all the time.