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Whoa. It's pretty hard not to judge on all those things and I'm super-chill about food stuff! The car seat thing is really unacceptable tho

I have learned that you don't get anywhere with some folks, so I just do the smile and shrug a lot.

Very scary for that baby

Someone pulled up next to me in a parking lot one day and in the passenger seat, the grandmother I'm guessing was feeding the baby a bottle. They had JUST pulled up and were definitely driving with out that baby in a carseat. It made me so furious, but I didn't say anything...

I am scared for that baby.

Those kids end up in our ICU after crashes that the parents never thought would happen. It's sad for the children who will never walk and need ventilators to breathe for the rest of their lives.

I would send him a video of what happens to kids in car crashes.

I second @Silva: I would report them. That's unbelievably dangerous and no amount of love is going to protect that child from choking on the ridiculous food they are allowing the child to have at this age or the lack of car seat if they were to be in an accident.
It's senseless, careless and down right negligent.

Yikes, the car seat thing is scary. I've wished I could do that a bunch of times (we drive 2+ hours bimonthly) but I never would!

@merriment: nicely put. That is the only way to find peace in situations like that

Geez. The God's will part seems pretty callous. You can't completely disregard her safety. I guess just keep trying to model good parenting. Maybe get her some nice gigs or books for Christmaa?

I agree that the car seat thing is pretty scary.

We were out shopping a few weeks ago and this elderly couple stopped us to admire the boys. They were talking about how when they were raising their kids, car seats didn't even exist.

It does make you wonder what our kids or grandkids will think about what we do now that in the future will be considered unthinkable.

I'd judge, too ... but I wouldn't say anything.

Obviously, they are pretty idiotic. I think babies are to avoid strawberries for a year, right? And the carseat thing? WHOA!

I really don't like unsolicited advice, so I would hesitate to give it (unless the child was in immediate danger).

They're not choices I would make, but to each their own...

@Vegmama: Never heard that babies are supposed to avoid strawberries for a year. I gave my daughter strawberries (pureed or cut into tiny pieces) way before she turned a year.

I can remember taking a 15 hour drive when my baby sister was 6 weeks old to see my dying Grandmother. My Mom was driving with 4 kids, by herself. I can remember taking her out of her seat and holding her while she slept to get her to stop crying so that my Mom could safely drive the car without worrying about the baby. Was it very safe, no. Would I do it with my DD, no (and I took a similar length drive and did lots of middle of the night leaning over the carseat nursing). But, sometimes, you do what you have to do in that moment. I don't think you can ever be totally safe 100% of the time, but you always have to do your best.

Do I think this person should be arguing with you about why this is OK, hell no.

Potentially dumb question but where I'm from it is not illegal to not use a car seat. Many mothers ride in the backseat with their babies in their arms. Third world.
However I was wondering... what happens if you need to take a public bus or train or taxi? Are you legally required to also use a carseat then?

@LulaBee: While those are some scary choices, maybe your delivery is what made him appear closed off? Not saying you were wrong for speaking up, but you said it was an argument. Sometimes it's easier for people to be more open minded (and have open ears!) if you change up your delivery a bit.

I agree that the car seat incident is dangerous but am having a hard time understanding why you would argue with him over his feeding choices. I get that it isn't best for baby, but it seems a little sanctimonious (and most likely unappreciated) to attack his parenting choices with an unsolicited parenting lesson.

Every baby is different. Every family is different. While I wouldn't do it myself, there are worse things in life than a hot dog bun and chocolate covered strawberry.