Most of the half peeps I know identify with their mom's ethnic background, since moms did most of the child rearing and they grow up eating mom's food. Food has such strong cultural ties.
Is that true for you? (Charlie eats mostly Korean food.)
-
My daughter will identify with my side more for sure. DH's side -German/Polish - do not do anything cultural so how can she really identify with them? I don't think DH even identifies with it.
ETA - And we both want her to speak Chinese, so that will make a big difference, too.
-
I sometimes forget LO is half-Chinese. To me, she's Korean. I've already made her gom-tang (ox tail soup) and I speak Korean words to her. I think she'll feel more Korean as she gets older.
-
I really hope our LO will identify with all her races. People are going to identify her as black, so we are working on creating strong bonds to the AA community. We're hoping that her Filipino grandma will be involved in her life so that she can understand her asian roots (as their family is very strongly tied to the Philippines still). We also hope that birthmom and her mom will be highly involved for her European roots. We're worried about the Native side because the family doesn't have strong (or any ties) to the tribe... so we'll probably work hard to find out more about that piece.
-
@Mrs. Bee: I think you are right on about identifying more with your mom's side. For me, that is definitely true, and it is more pronounced because my parents were divorced and I grew up primarily with my mom and stepdad, who are both white. Also, while my dad is Cuban, he never made an effort to teach us Spanish. I think food is second only to language when it comes to reinforcing culture, and it's especially true for Hispanic cultures. I don't identify as Latina really, but I do wish I spoke Spanish.
@Mrs. Jacks: I think that is so great! Our LOs will very likely be identified by others as black also. I want them to feel proud to be black and connected to that part of themselves, but I also want them to appreciate the other two ethnicities that contributed to their multicultural background, as well. Sometimes I worry a little that they will feel "just black", as I know a lot of biracial kids feel the need to pick a side, and that one will probably be easier.
-
@daniellemybelle: In a way, it's protective to pick the black side because that's how other people see them, right?
-
@Mrs. Bee: I agree with you in some ways that the kids will identify with their mom's ethnic background more than their fathers, since the moms will have more of the time with the kids or whatever. My mom encouraged us to identify with both sides.
My dad is Chinese and my mom is caucasian. My sisters and I completely identify with our chinese side, but ironically it's because our mom encouraged us and wanted us to do that. Most people that meet my parents actually think that it's my Mom that is Chinese and not my dad.
He didn't teach us how to speak chinese, mainly because my mom doesn't. She tried to learn when they first got married and apparently it was a huge disaster. My mom jokes that my dad doesn't even act like he was born in China....he's more at home on a tractor, in his overalls. It would infuriate my mother when one of my sisters would say something about being half-chinese. My mom would go into this talk about how we are half nothing, we are a whole mix of wondrful cultures, blended into a beautiful child, etc. My sister would look at her with this look in her eyes and say, "Yeah, well, we are still half-chinese."
-
@Mrs. Jacks: Definitely. I am just a worry wart so I play out all the different potentially troubling scenarios that could come along with that. It's silly, considering that DH is black and is very proud to be African American and hasn't really encountered a lot of discrimination or challenges because of his race. But especially with all this heartbreaking Trayvon Martin stuff going on, the responsibility of raising black kids in America does weigh heavy on me at times... especially a black son. Obviously whether they identify strongly as black doesn't affect that much, but I don't want them to feel like they have to fit a certain mold, or that they are "different" just because of their ethnicity.
-
@Mrs. Jacks: I commend you on trying to incorporate and teach your LO her heritage, along with your own! bravo.
As for us, my husband and I are both korean but we are not fluent (he less than me). So, unfortunately, LO won't be bilingual. But I will definitely make him korean food as well as non-korean food.
-
I think I identify with both (well "white" + something else) pretty much equally.
Growing up (and still) I hated when people would try to identify me as one OR the other. That happened to me a lot. I am PART this and PART that. I especially ran into problems when people would say, "you're not white, you're x" as though that made me a better person or something (Of the places I've lived most have been big in "minority" populations.)
I hope that our LO will be able to experience at least a little bit of everything that they are, even though he/she will be very mixed. If he/she identifies with a particular culture more (which will probably happen because he/she will be verrryyy mixed) then that's fine!
He didn't teach us how to speak chinese, mainly because my mom doesn't. She tried to learn when they first got married and apparently it was a huge disaster. My mom jokes that my dad doesn't even act like he was born in China....he's more at home on a tractor, in his overalls. Reply
Subscribe to our newsletter
- Google Plus
- Stumbleupon
- Twitter
- Facebook
- Pinterest
- Favorite0
9 comments