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I loved not knowing until she was born. I will do it again with number 2.

ETA: I don't think it impacted me bonding with her. If anything, I thought more about what it meant to become a parent, and about the baby in this great big way, rather than the specific of who she was. And, in a way, not knowing her sex helped me not project anything on to her. I try not to do that now that she is here, but it can be hard sometimes because as parents we sort of expect our kids to be a certain way- but really, I just want her to be who she is. I was so surprised that she was a girl. I didn't feel the instant "huge wave of love" but I didn't really expect to- it was this amazing, slow build that happened in tiny moments as I got to know her.

I needed to know what we were having. I was pretty disconnected to the pregnancy for awhile since I had had issues staying pregnant. Knowing what I was having helped me picture her actually being here and accepting that she was actually coming! It was too abstract otherwise. We'll be finding out for #2, too.

So so worth it!! I wavered around 20 weeks when my ultrasound came but in the end didn't find out. After that I didn't question our decision because I knew we were past the 1/2 way point so each day brought us closer to meeting our baby.

I didn't fear labor because I was so focused on finding out the gender. The absolute best moment of my life was hearing DH say "it's a girl!!"! Dh loved getting to go out to the waiting room and tell everyone. He didn't want to be team green initially but after going through it he would do it again in a heartbeat. There was so much anticipation!

I will definitely be team green again for future LOs but understand it's not for everyone.

ETA: as for bonding, it didn't impact me personally. For preparing, I knew I wanted neutral gear and nursery anyway. My shower was great because I didn't get 100000 outfits and instead got practical things. Got lots of clothes once she was born though!

We did not find out the first time - despite my husband really wanting to know, I talked him into waiting - and I wouldn't trade that experience for anything. FWIW, neither would he! I was too nervous at our 20 week scan to really enjoy finding out and it seemed anticlimactic to have the US tech tell us. Instead, my husband was the one to announce "It's a boy!" as soon as DS was born, and it was just a perfect moment. I'm now expecting LO#2 and we're going Team Green again. Everyone is different, but I strongly recommend waiting to anyone who considers it!

I found out and I'm glad we did. But to be fair it was never even a question for us-- I didn't see the value (to me) in waiting at all. I wanted to know so I could plan better. I wanted to do a cute nursery that didn't have to be gender neutral. I wanted cute clothes with bows or bow ties. I wanted to decide on a name. And I wanted to feel more bonded to my LO. Being able to say "your daughter's really been kicking this morning!" or have my husband ask "how are you and Fiona?" has made me feel so much like she is a REAL PERSON in there. Not just some baby. Our baby. And now that she's almost here (today is her due date! But apparently I have a stubborn little girl haha) I don't feel that knowing she's a she takes away from my excitement at all. I am SO EXCITED to meet her. I can't wait to hold her and snuggle her and meet this little girl I've been talking to for months. I don't think I need her gender to be a surprise to be more excited about her birth.

@char54: +1. Loved being team green, getting neutral gear to reuse down the road, finding out the sex at birth. But we will find out for future LOs.

I want to know now and I'm not even pregnant yet! I'm an obsessive planner and just a busy body who needs to know things so I am not a normal example. I sometimes skip to the end of books! My friend waited to find out and said or was the most magical experience. I don't think you can go wrong either way.

I really wanted to be TG and DH really wanted to find out. He was so excited about it I agreed to find out and I'm glad we did. I felt bonded to the baby before, but finding out definitely made it stronger. I also had a strong feeling we were having a boy and it's a girl. While I would have been thrilled either way, I was pretty surprised at 20w and if I had waited the whole time I would have been picturing a little boy the whole time and have been totally shocked at the end. I've really tried to keep all of our gear purchases gender neutral and that hasn't been difficult. The biggest negative to me is that people have really been pestering about names since we found out and it's really not something I want to discuss. Honestly I feel like you can't go wrong either way, but personally I'm happy that DH convinced me to find out.

I found out with both of mine, and I somewhat regret not being team green at least once. We are more than likely done, and it makes me a little sad not to get that surprise. If by some chance we have a third, we will absolutely be team green.

@blackbird: Your response is so similar to how I am feeling right now!! I am only 9 weeks, and it doesn't feel real because of what I have been through.

I am hoping finding out the gender will make it more real and make me feel closer as well. We think it's a girl

I think there are pros and cons to each. For me, it was important to find out because of a chromosome scare, but I can totally see being TG too. I think it depends on the circumstances and personalities. The only thing that kind of bugs me is when people say one way is so much superior to the other. They're both fun in their own way!

I found out, because I figure it's a surprise anyway whether you're surprised at 20 weeks or at birth! All of LO's gear is gender neutral, as are a lot of her clothes, so I didn't find that hard to do even knowing her sex ahead of time.

Yeah - that's my other thought too - I had a c-section, and I wouldn't have actually even probably cared what sex she was at the time she came out, I was so overwhelmed! So I think the "it's a girl" moment isn't a given.

@magnolia-I hope it does! I found out at 13 weeks (had a CVS) and it was just huge for me to know "it" was a "she" and "she" was OK it's still a huge surprise to know what you're having, whether it's week 13, week 20, or week 40.

i've never considered not knowing, but i also had a strong gender preference and wanted time to deal if i didn't get what i was hoping for (which is what happened). But also for the reasons you listed, i also wanted to know - to bond with baby and i didn't see how a surprise at 20 weeks was any different than at 40 weeks. I also didn't want my parents and friends buying all "gender neutral" stuff (although my mom couldn't even wait 20 weeks and got a bunch of yellow stuff anyway, lol). I also only wanted to focus on picking one name.

I will always find out because I'm inpatient and feel like waiting til 18/20 weeks is long enough not to know lol plus I like to plan and have everything ready

I want to try for baby 2, but idk if I can handle the suspense!

With DS we were team green until the very end when we were having a million ultrasounds and the doctor slipped. That was a disappointment but I loved not knowing the rest of the pregnancy.
This time we did find out and I wish we hadn't. If we have another then I don't want to find out.

I loooooved being team green - it was the best experience! & I thought we were having and girl but we had a boy which made it even better! I'll do team green again in a heartbeat!

@skipra: I was convinced we were having a girl too! So much for intuition