Everyone has their own unique parenting style, which works for them and their family. However, JUDGEMENT FREE...what is one thing you see other parents do that drives you absolutely batty?!
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Yelling/being rude to their kids in public. Drives me crazy.
Example: "If you don't shut up, I'm going to...." in the middle of a crowded restaurant
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Unnecessarily shoving electronics in their kids faces -- e.g. They are at a restaurant and kid is happily coloring and the parent just hands over a phone or tablet.
Not handling their kid when they are being naughty -- e.g. Their kid is throwing sand at the park or hitting other kids and the parent doesn't do anything.
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Just 1? But I have so many!
Probably my biggest pet peeve is letting their kid run the show. You are not their friend, and the child is not the boss. BE A PARENT. Or your kid you going to grow up in to an entitled brat who thinks the world revolves around them, and then we all have to deal with them
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Puffy coats in car seats. I cant.
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Not paying attention/ignoring situations. I get it, no one wants to be a helicopter parent, but sometimes, people need to step in and intervene before things escalate.
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@mrskansas: OMG YES!!!! or when they actually hit them! ughhhh drives me insane!
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@Boogs: Absolutely!! Horrible smh
@Truth Bombs: hahahaha I totally hear you! I never realized how annoying other parents were until I became a parent myself. -
@looch: That really makes me sad. I have to intervene at the park the other day because I didn't see the parent in sight and the one kid was seriously going to hit the other kid. Turns out the father was just sitting there not paying attention and both kids were his!
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Not watching their kids. Especially when they are being rough with other kids or destructive
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Saying "You're fine," to a crying child. It really bothers me when people diminish what others are feeling!
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@mrsrain: Thanks for this - people say "You're fine" to MY kid all the time! Normally I don't feel the need to explain my whole parenting philosophy to people but I always interject for that one. I usually say "We don't tell her she's fine; she decides when she's fine."
I get stressed out by other parents over-directing their kids' play (but maybe that's just my RIE streak showing). We'll go to a playground and all these parents will just be constantly shouting at their kids to micro-manage every single thing they do. Or if DD is playing with another toddler and the other kid takes her toy or something, the other parent almost always overreacts - the worst is when they yell at their kid to make them apologize. I just want to be like, trust me, if you trust them, they will work this out and it will be fine. Relax.
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I dislike:
1. parents who threaten to hit/punch/etc their kid. hate that.
2. parents not paying attention in dangerous situations or while their kid is a jerk to other kids
3. helicopter parents who judge me for not helicoptering too. -
This is totally self centered and not even a parenting thing so much, but parents who give their kids nut based snacks in public play areas (like indoor playgrounds, the library, etc.). My LO isn't allergic to anything, but I'm deathly allergic to peanuts/tree nuts and I'm often very nervous to be in play areas with LO, particularly if I'm alone with her. That being said, I know everyone has a total right to snacks wherever, but this is something that I never anticipated being an issue so I thought I'd mention it here!
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@Rocker2014: I agree and I have no allergy concerns but i do NOT think people have the right to snack wherever!
It drives me nuts when parents give their kids snacks at places like the library (where there are signs that clearly say no food or drink) or more recently at the children's museum where there IS a designated snack/lunch area and this one woman fed her kids a whole lunch in a different random area. If a snack comes out then all the kids who see it want one too, and sometimes the parent offers to share and then I'm put in the position of telling my LO no because I don't want her eating random food from some unknown person at a time/place they shouldn't be eating anyway. So rude.
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@Rocker2014: That's a good one! My son is allergic to peanuts and tree nuts (and sesame), so I'm definitely paranoid about their being peanut/tree nut residue on toys or equipment at public play places.
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Similar to some of the pps, it's the parents who totally aren't watching their kids at all at the playground, where the kid is doing something dangerous or being kind of a jerk (not really a jerk, just acting their age and needing guidance and not getting any).
There was an older boy at the park last fall that kept following my newly-walking 1 year old around and poking and pushing at her, pretend-playing that she was a "bad guy" and he was pretend shooting her loudly and poking at her and shouting in her face. I redirected him SEVERAL times, told him he needed to back up because she's just learning to walk and a baby, asked him to please stop touching her....the parents were no where to be found. This went on for 15 or so minutes. Another random parent interceded and also tried nicely redirecting him. I was completely losing my patience and I'm a teacher and read a ton of gentle parenting stuff. Finally his mother called him over to leave---and it was a woman that was sitting the entire time on a bench, on her phone, totally acting the whole time as if he was not her child. I had scanned the park several times, looking for an adult that might belong to him--someone that had their eyes on him. She never did and he was being really obnoxious. He seemed to have some learning difficulties because he clearly didn't have much social awareness for his age (he must have been 8 or 9), and that's an even better reason his parent should have been supervising his play so he's not terrorizing 1 year olds. Several times he would poke and push as my toddler while she was gingerly trying to go up or down steps. Just watch your kid. Even if you feel they are old enough to play alone, you should be aware as a parent that older kids can still trample younger kids.
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@rocker2014: I never realized till I was a parent how likely a small child is to smear peanut butter on absolutely every surface available after eating her peanut butter toast. Always good to point this stuff out to us non-allergy families.
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@PawPrints: YESSSS to the parents overacting! DS is a huge kid and when I had him enrolled in this play class other parents swore he was older and therefore should know better and was seen as a bully. It use to take everything in me to be like hey asshole he's the same age your baby or even younger. One grandmom was a sweetheart and when my son took something from her grandson, as kids do, I went to take it away from him and tell him no and all that. She stopped me and said they're kids, if my grandson wants he'll get it.
These are all great annoyances guys! lol
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@Anya: I agree, if the sign says no food or drink, don't open up the lunchbox right there, go to the designated area.
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My only big one is not really doing anything when a kid is blatantly hurting or about to hurt another kid. Everyone has their own style of discipline, but we were at the playground and this one kid just kept pushing or hitting my daughter. The mom would come over and say something gentle like hands are not for hitting, which is fine, but by the third time he made my kid cry, she really should have left the park.
Ironically- the other one that drives me nuts is criticizing other parents. I'm not perfect but I try not to judge and realize I never know a whole story.
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@Anagram: UGH! Stuff like that boils my blood. Watch your kid always!!!
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Parents on the phone at the park/classes/public places. I don't care if you want to be on your phone all the time at home or in a place where your kid is safe and poses no risk to anyone else - that's your business. Heck I'm guilty of having days at home where I just feel like checking out a little. But at the park or in a class or at the children's museum, you pay attention for your kids safety and those around them. Also, they like when we watch them and react!
I was at the park a few weeks ago and there were two brothers playing on their scooters (without helmets which also bothers me). And it was CROWDED because it was unseasonably warm. One kid fell off the scooter and laid there crying for a full minute while the other brother frantically yelled MOM! MOM! She was on the other side of the park talking on the phone with her back to them. She never even heard them she just eventually turned around and it registered that it was her kid crying on the ground. I was pretty floored. I almost ran over to the kid because I felt so bad but some other parents got there before me. But even then they just stood over him unsure of what to do! I'm so not a helicopter mom, I like to let my son experience the playground as he sees fit. But you still have to watch and be close enough to intervene if need be. I check the time on my phone at the playground and that's IT. There are too many things that can happen (strangers, mean kids, falls from high up, etc)
Also when we did a music class there was a kid who would just run around and shove other kids. The nanny/mom was ALWAYS sitting to the side on her phone and never intervened. It was pretty infuriating.
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@PawPrints: @bubblegum: This.... this drives me crazy.
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Parents who offer my daughter help when we are in a public play area or gym and then glare at me and say things like "let ME help you." Um, back off. I know my kid's limits. When she needs help I help her. Otherwise she's free to explore without me right next to her.
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@mrsrain: Yes this!! My parents/sister say this to my kids all the time and it drives me f'ing bonkers. Do not diminish how my kids feel or tell them how to feel.
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People who don't pay attention and their kids are putting their mouth all over things like carts etc. or store items that they then put back on the shelf. First of all, how are these people not always sick? Secondly, they probably are and are spreading germs everywhere!
ETA building on that - people who are in a store with their kids and are on the phone loudly exclaiming how little bob has the flu or was up all night throwing up etc.
Also, people who let their kids climb up slides or anything other 'off label' playground equipment use (when there are other kids there.)
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1. Another vote for the peanuts / nuts snacks in public areas. What disregard for others.
2. Threatening spankings / acting like spanking is the main form of discipline.
3. Gun play.
4. People who have unrealistic behavioral expectations for their kids' developmental level. Yes, you have to repeat directions many times and multiple days. Your kid is 2. -
1. When I get flack for prioritizing my kids' sleep - especially from other parents. No, my kids do not nap in the stroller. No, they will not just fall asleep when they are tired. No, they can't hang out until 10pm just because your kids stay up late. No, it's not a shame my kids aren't flexible like your kids. Because my kids are almost always happy and well behaved in social settings and they don't act like squirrels on acid.
2. When I see parents with infants and toddlers - like under 2 - on late night Walmart or supermarket runs and the baby is either keeled over the handlebars passed out or having a complete meltdown. It's midnight, BOTH of you are here, one of you couldn't stay home and put the kids to bed??
Obviously I'm a sleep junkie.
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@gingerbebe: YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!!!!!! 100 times yes!!!! SIL let's my niece anywhere and looks at us like were nuts because we have a strict bedtime. I've had so many events in my house where people are still there after DS bedtime but guess what he's in bed! As he should be
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@JerricaBenton: This would have to be mine too. I mean I totally get you might be home alone with a sick kid and it's urgent you need to get out and grab something, like meds. But if it's something leisurely, like out to eat at a restaurant, that bugs me. Keep your sick kid home! Also parents who show up to an event and their kid is clearly sick and they didn't mention it and don't acknowledge it. Or acknowledge and laugh it off.
But I'm a germaphobe so...
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Parents not watching their kids in public places, particularly parents of older kids who because they aren't being closely watched or given guidance are rough or behave in ways that are dangerous for littler kids. Like, climbing UP the slide when here are children waiting to slide down. I'm not a helicopter parent but my daughter is little and I need to be her advocate because shes too young to be her own-- I've scolded older kids before when their own parents are nowhere to be seen and they're harassing my lo, like dumping water on her in the splash pad. Or at or local children's museum there was an exhibit for under 5s but older siblings were often there too being way too rough. Drives me bananas!
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I have another thing to add.
We were at a restaurant eating with my then 1.5 yr old and sitting in a booth. There was a girl with her parents in the booth beside ours who was probably 6 or 7 years old and kept turning around and trying to touch my daughter's head and face. The parents said or did NOTHING. It was so annoying. Just tell your kid to leave mine alone! We're eating and your kid is probably super germy. Ugh
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@gingerbebe: YASS!! Every kid is different. I refuse to have a screaming kid melting down in your living room at your party, so I won't be there at 9pm with her. Every kid is different.
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The other day I was in Trader Joes, and this 2/3 year old kid was SCREAMING at the top of his lungs the entire time I was there, had to be 10+ minutes... The mother was just walking around shopping, mostly ignoring, but also saying to him, "Really, are you going to do this right now?" in a monotone sort of way.... I left the store with a pounding headache, wondering how I would have handled that... I'm pretty sure I would have abandoned my cart and taken the kid outside and dealt with why the screaming was happening... but i was surprised she did nothing.
I have to say though, since becoming a parent, and especially becoming a parent of two! I find myself not being as bothered by how others parent/cope with situations.... the pain-inducing screaming couldn't escape my attention.... but otherwise I just think - hey, whatever works for you. Talk to me pre-parenthood and i had MANY opinions. Haha, so naive....
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This is a great post if for no other reason it will make us nut-eaters mindful that snacks in public can be dangerous!
The only thing that annoys me so far are parents that seem to ignore and not interact with their kids. Basically they parent practically in silence. Who knows I may annoy parents by constantly talking to LO interrupting their train of thought.
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@bubblegum: I just don't understand. Do you like sleeping in an airplane seat hunched over? Do you like trying to go to sleep in the middle of a Denny's at 3am? Then why would my kid want to sleep in a stroller or at your house during a dinner party at 8pm?
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Yelling (or worse) at children in public. You can generally tell who has simply hit the end of the rope as a parent and who yells in public at their children as a matter of course. If they treat their children like that in public, I assume private is much worse.
Also, parents that won’t discipline or set boundaries *at all*. There is a girl (maybe 6 or 7? Old enough to behave) who has a ballet class right after LO’s so every weekend we are stuck in the same hallway together. She is bouncing OFF THE WALLS, yelling, talking, bumping into little kids (including knocking some down), bumping into adults, tapping with tap shoes on (so, *loud* tapping/dancing), singing loudly and whether her mom or dad takes her – radio silence. She is so annoying and loud (and bumps into little kids and others) and they can’t be bothered to say one word to their princess, except to occasionally tell her how beautifully she is singing/dancing. If my kid was bouncing around wildly being obnoxious they would be getting the mom-death-glare and intervention.
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@PawPrints: This is really great. I am going to use this, thank you!
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@gingerbebe: EXACTLY!!!! I've actually seen people who have their kid sleep on the floor on a blanket during a party!!! Like whattttt who does that?! I always get the face of confusion when leaving a party early...tough shit. I want my kid to be comfortable!
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64 comments