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I'd ask her straight up to resolve this with you. If she doesn't, give her negative feedback. If you paid by credit card, you could also request a charge back.

@HLK208: how did you pay for the outfit? If she won't give you your money back, I would dispute the charge, if you used a credit card. That's a bad seller there if she doesn't believe you and has not offered a resolution.

@MaryM: Great way to present it!

@HLK208: paypal disputes are for if you pay for something and it came as something else (say she sent you pants instead of a onesie) or if she never sends it at all. PayPal has nothing to do with the quality of an item after you've washed it.
I'd tell her she BETTER refund it (you don't want another one because the same thing will happen!)
If she doesn't- I'd absolutely filed a complaint to etsy and go after it until resolved.
I'd probably go to paypal at the end of the whole ordeal if no one responds at all.
Please don't dispute "double". That's really unethical. And disputing with a credit card isn't ethical either because you paid for something and YOU GOT IT. You didn't do it on accident and it wasn't fraud.

Definitely try through Etsy first, and if that doesn't work, go to PayPal! Such a bummer though.

Also, even if she HAD washed the onesie first (and not the flowers) you would've had the same problem eventually.

Oh yeah, she should be giving you a refund. Good grief, are you never supposed to wash it?

Also, how is no one else wanting to see a picture of this?! It sounds beautiful!! (Pre wash-disaster, obv)

Everyone has already given good advice so I just wanted to chime in and say yikes and I'm so sorry this has happened to you! I hope etsy resolves this for you.

@HLK208: hmm, sounds like she is not wanting to work with you on this.

@HLK208: That seems like a super lame reply. I would have totally offered a replace by now free of charge. I think you need to be direct and tell her what you are expecting from her weather it be a replacement or money back. Good luck! Sorry you are dealing with a weird seller. Most etsy sellers are not like this.

Baby clothing that can't be washed?!?!? Her response to you is unbelievable. Who puts a newborn in unwashed clothes, "high-quality" or not? And what are you supposed to do when the baby spits up or leaks, like babies normally do? I'd absolutely dispute plus give negative feedback.

@HLK208: Shouldn't be washed? Is she cray cray?

Thats BS. Dispute it!

@HLK208: Even if it is prop, you wash it! Esp. photographers since the outfit is worn by numerous babies.

@HLK208: This all baffles me! I would just include the excerpts from her email in your review and say that you are providing this as a warning to other new mom's and just as further disclosure about the outfit. You could send her the review that you plan to post and explain that you feel you are in a rock and a hard place, but you wanted to give her the opportunity to refund your money and y'all call it even. You could even offer to send back the ruined outfit if she believes she could salvage it. I hate to seem like I'm advocating blackmailing her (not sure if that's the right term for what I'm saying to do), but we are crazy pregnant ladies.... why do people insist on pissing us off?

You really need to send us a link to this store so we can see how obviously AMAZING her clothing is if she expects people to never wash it and only use it once...

@HLK208: what are her store policies? What does the listing you purchased from say?

I sell on Etsy & am a little turned off by her behavior and responses.... But my opinion on how this should be handled depends on her store policy.

She should be pre-washing everything before she makes it and using a product like Retayne to ensure that it won't bleed. She also can not go back and claim they are not meant to be washed after giving you instructions on how to wash it.