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I think some things are fine used, and others I prefer new. I think its fine to want newer models in things like strollers. You have to lug those around and put them in and out of the car pretty often so you don't want them to be bulky. For me its worth it to spend some money on it, or at least spend money on a used version of what I want.

@shopaholic: If there was a polite to say no thanks I might do that. I might say someone already bought me one. Because since its your SIL, she may expect to see you using it if she comes over, so she wil realize you got rid of it

i struggled with this too. we were getting all these hands me downs from SIL, or my in-laws were going ahead and buying things from parent sales or garage sales without really asking if we needed it or wanted it. it's hard, you don't want to come off as ungrateful, but there are definitely things that you wanted to have a decision in or had a vision of an item to use for your LO.

so we got a used bulky high chair, an electric swing, a graco snap and go car seat, blankets, clothes, potty chairs (yes multiple), clothing, wash cloths, a bob stroller and numerous other small things. i have to say, we kept the majority of things, except the graco car seat since it was over 5 years old and was missing the balancing meter. there was a point where i was telling my husband to tell his family to cool it with the buying and to come to us FIRST before they buy, because I couldn't take it anymore, and he agreed too but probably because he couldn't take me complaining anymore LOL. and i absolutely put my foot down on the nursery decor, because i did have a specific vision for what I wanted.

hopefully you can convince your husband about better strollers that are available now, and the convenience of having one fold up and open easily, and fold the way it should. keep on talking to him too though, and perhaps before the next round of things come, let him know that you'd like him to be on the same page with you before accepting everything.

I feel the same way....It's not only that I want "NEW" stuff, it's really more that I have a very specific idea in mind for all of DD's things, and not just "any old thing" will do. I have researched everything, and I want a certain stroller, a certain baby gym, etc. I feel guilty bc I have seen some stuff second hand (and in VERY good condition) at consignment shops, but if it's not exactly what I had in mind, I can't shake it. That's either me wanting everything to be perfect for my first LO, or being a control freak - I don't know, but I also feel sort of snobby. I went to a really nice baby consignment shop and they had a similar baby gym to the one I want - but it didn't have the arch thingy for LO to lay on her back and look up at the dangly toys. It was $10. The one I want is $50. $40 difference could not break what I have my heart and brain set on for her!

And OMG to EVER have threatened my UBV dreams with an old bulky stroller - woah. That would have been way too tough for me!

My mom was so excited about sending me this box of clothes for Harper and it came today, and it's pretty much all garage sale clothes - which is FINE - but none of it is anything I would have bought...It all looks so worn:( And she wants H to wear one of the outfits home from the hospital even though I think it looks a little ratty, and H has a whole closet of ridiculous fancy stuff that I worked really hard on putting together for her:) But to please my mom and to NOT feel like a snob, I just told my mom that when she gets here, she can go through everything H has and pick out her going-home outfit. It's only a 10 minute car ride, so if she wants her to wear something I don't love, I'll survive. But like you, I feel guilty about it. Like I feel like I'll seem like I think that my baby is "too good" or "above" those things...And it's not that at all - it's honestly just that I'm so excited and I have visions of everything for her, and feel good about all of my selections - right down to her Nosefrida Snot Snucker.

I feel you, sister:)

I would get a new car seat, get the stroller you want and I would just get a booster seat high chair! They're small, easy to clean, portable and cheap!

I have a fisher price booster that I've been using for over a year now. It's in perfect shape still!

Also, you're not being snobby.. She raised boys and the gear is old!

@MungBean: omg JEALOUS!!! hahaha!!

@PrincessBaby: I love your post. I totally lol'ed.

If it were my sister or SIL I am close enough to tell them that I already have some things and don't need more. Like my nephew is just a little older than my son, so we get some of his clothes. But I bought so many clothes for DS anyway that I just told my sister I only a few items so she lets me go through them and pick out the ones I actually want. What I don't want she gives to her neighbor for her son. She's not offended I'm not taking the clothes But I can understand some people being offended.

Honestly I would never take anything more than 5 years old either and that is totally stretching it. The items I did buy used, it didn't matter that they were used (a play gym that didn't look used, a bumbo, borrowed swing, etc).

I get it

I totally get what you are saying about researching the stuff so much and wanting to get the stuff you thought about - I was the queen of "this isn't really my taste..." when my son came along. Had to have that Bugaboo. And you know what, I still love that darn thing, two years later! I figure you can only buy baby stuff for yourself in a very small window so why not!?

I don't know. A lot of that stuff that your SIL gave you, I think you can find a use for- for example, if you spend a lot of time at your in laws or your parents house, then maybe that's a good place for the swing (if you don't have room- if it's just that "it's old" but it still works then I would just keep it- you might find that your crying infant loves it.. They usually don't care if something is brand new or not).
In the meantime, I would just take the hand me downs and use what you can, but if your heart is set on a piece of baby gear, get it. I have a TON of crazy hand me downs from my SIL, and some of it is great, and some of it is gross, but I'm grateful to have her be so generous. I use what I can, and the rest is saved for donation or brought to grandmas house.