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Passing brown clots today...

Miscarried last night.

I woke up last night around 2:30 with really bad cramps. My back hurt and it felt like I had to poop but couldn't. The cramps felt like really bad period cramps.

At 2:40am, I had an urge to push or bear down. When I did, I felt a "gloop" slip out of my body. It looked like a small piece of liver. I put on some gloves and fished it out of the bowl to see if that was it. I washed it and inspected it, kind of mesmerized by the science on my hand. Then I felt another urge to push, I looked down and realized I was bleeding all over the bathroom floor. Great.

I went back to the toilet and beared down, another "gloop" came out. I fished it out and rinsed it.

It appeared to be two halves of a sack. I couldn't tell what part was the amniotic sac, although I think I saw a clearish bubble, but couldn't make out anything inside.

So probably a blighted ovum, or the baby stopped growing at 4 weeks or something.

Immediately after passing these two halves, my cramping subsided. It wasn't ALL gone, but the intensity was. It was just a dull ache afterward.

I was in shock though, didn't know what to do with the pieces after looking at them for a while. I woke up my husband and told him "it happened", and he shot up out of bed and asked me if I was okay and how I was feeling. He asked me why I was holding it and I said, "I don't know. I wanted to look at it but now I don't know what to do with it. Do I flush it?"

He said, "just treat it like a regular heavy period." I agreed but asked him to flush it because I couldn't.

So he took the container from me and went to flush it. I took two Advil and went back to sleep.

I feel better today. Cramps are on and off, maybe once and hour, and no where near a painful as cramps leading up to the miscarriage. I'm still passing blood, but it now seems like a medium period. I'm not bleeding through any pads or anything.

I had a small headache when I woke up, so I'm running on Advil today. I'll be resting. Monday is my scheduled ultrasound so we'll see if anything is left over from the miscarriage. Then we plan to get back to TTCing as soon as I stop bleeding and if my HCG levels are low enough.

Because I never had an ultrasound, I won't ever actually know the cause of this miscarriage. But I'm really glad its over. I'm also really glad it didn't happen at work.

For those curious, going through or have gone through the same thing. I'm going to type out my miscarriage timeline for reference.

5 - 7 week Miscarriage Timeline
February 1 - BFP after missed period for 3-4 days.
- Symptoms included: feeling hungry and full at the same time, can't eat more than a few bites, IBS symptoms (constipation, diarrhea, gassy), excessive saliva, tender breasts, some cramping, frequent urination, backache (I have a retroverted uterus).
February 2 - big fight with mother, got emotional and stressed, same symptoms as above, vaginal itchiness/swelling, bloating, increased thirst.
February 6 - blood test confirmed pregnancy. HCG level 6205.
February 8 - new symptom: ACNE break out
February 11 - EXTREME fatigue, and a feeling of "zoning out" during dinner time. In hindsight, I think this was when my body registered that the pregnancy was not viable.
February 12 - EXTREME fatigue / zoned out feeling continued at work. Second blood test results came back from a different lab. HCG level reported to drop to 4388. The receptionist who delivered this news implied I was miscarrying. I felt blindsided and had to look up what dropping betas meant online. Radio silence from them over the
Valentines/Family Day long weekend. I was incredibly sad, stressed, and anxious.
February 13 - Deep down, I knew something was wrong. I didn't "feel pregnant" anymore. Realized my symptoms have gone away except for backache and some slight cramping. Breasts were significantly less sore. I had a dream of baby girl's face that night.
February 14 - Some of the symptoms came back a little, so that eased my concerns. Sudden increase of libido (although that remained unfulfilled because I was so anxious), frequent urination, white discharge, headache, bloating, cramping, backaches.
February 15 - brown spotting began on and off.
February 16 - Third blood test results back back. HCG dropped to 2315. Doctor informed me that the pregnancy is non-viable I am going to miscarry and expect bleeding soon. Spent the day curled up in my room crying. Gave myself until the closure of my miscarriage to grieve. Promised myself to move on soon. Brown spotting continues.
February 17 - brown spotting gets heavier but on and off
February 18 - brown spotting gets heavier and its pretty constant
February 19 - passing brown clots, cramps are no longer on and off, cramps become a dull constant ache. I think it will happen tonight or tomorrow. Later on in the evening, clots are tinged red
February 20 - 2:30 am, I wake up to bad cramps, and miscarry 10 minutes later.

How I found out I was miscarrying: through HCG blood test
Ultrasound?: Not until after miscarriage
Cramps?: increasing in intensity up until miscarriage - feels like really bad period cramps with urge to poop/push
Bleeding: started out at brown spotting, became brown clots, then tinged red, then looks like a regular heavy flow period.

Time I started spotting until the time I had my miscarriage: 5 days.
Time spotting turned red until the miscarriage: within 12 hours.
Time it took for miscarriage to complete: less than one hour

Could I tell when the miscarriage had passed?: yes
How?: passed two noticeable "gloops" (like a squishy smooth golf ball sliding out, can't control it), immediate subsiding intensity of cramps