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LOVE! and totally resonates with me, esp the lines you picked out...!

Makes me sad that the writer's daughter asked if she loved work more than them though

@Mrs. Jacks: fun mama!

I have thought a lot about what I'd say if my son asked me why I work. I want to convey to him that his father and I have created a partnership and he's an important part of it, in the sense that both paid and upaid work are important to moving our family forward. I don't want him walking around thinking money grows on trees and every one has it, I want to instill in him if you want something, you have to work for it and there are many ways you can do that.

But he's 2, so, I have some time.

If there were a "like" button I would click it

Love this piece, and it does resonate with me; both the lines you posted and: "I work because I want you and your brother to be proud of me", which I totally agree with.

I want my daughter to look up to me as an example: to get her education and make education a priority (and to understand the doors more education opens), to find work that she's passionate about and to not rely on anyone to complete her emotionally or financially. I want her to be financially independent from men; I want her to be proud to support herself and to understand the freedom that financial independence provides.

I want her to know that my working was putting HER first, even though it wasn't always easy or fun.

I hope when she's old enough to have kids that she/society isn't still making the assumption that if you put your kids first, you have to spend every waking moment with them....unless of course you're the dad.

I also work because I enjoy working; I like "working out" my mind. I need to be intellectually challenged and stimulated on a daily basis; it makes me a happier mama.

It's interesting because I know when I was in middle/high school, I gave my Mom a ton of flack for NOT working. I've apologized since of course. Even though I stay at home, this essay is really powerful!

This was such a beautiful story!! Love it!!

I love this. It is exactly what I needed to read today.

It's been bugging me lately that no one asked my DH if he was going to be a SAHD, or judges him for not taking off more than 8 weeks before going back to work (he's taking 1). Even though I do *have* to work to support my family, I hope to pass on to my daughter that women should have all choices available to them, and should not be judged for whichever path they choose.

Ah, this made my day. Thank you for posting it

This is really great. I hate having to explain to people that I plan to go back to work not because we need the money (although we do for the lifestyle we have) but simply because I want to, I'm a better, more happy and satisfied me when I work.

Love it! Thanks so much for posting it. I had this "argument" with my mom the other day. She basically told me how terrible it was that I was working instead of being home with LO and got me really down. Especially since I missed him terribly that day. This was exactly the thing I needed!

Love!

DH and I have chosen for me to stay home, whereas my mother always worked outside of the home, and his mom did some of both. I'm thankful that LO will have examples of women who have chosen different paths, and it's my hope that she will never feel like she's not valued no matter what her choice is on this subject.

I'm not offended by people asking me if I'm taking 6-8 weeks, etc but not asking DH and I wouldn't be offended or upset if my child asked why I did or didn't work. I believe the mom's role is to be a caretaker in ways dads just aren't. Not to say that dads aren't nurturing, each parent has their own way of ensuring their child is loved and cared for and dads do things moms just can't. Biologically, men and women were designed to be different in many ways, including how they care for their children. As a woman and soon to be mom, I cherish the fact that it's expected for me to take more than a week off and that it's acceptable for me to reduce my hours or even to step away from my career.

I don't think I'd want things to be the same for men and women and I'd share my thankfulness of having the choice with my child if asked.

This was a great article--thanks for sharing!

@daniellemybelle: I agree that Mrs. Jack's example of same-sex parents was on point!

As for maternity leave and workplace flexibility - for me, it's less about protecting maternity leave and more about expanding it so that there's more parental leave for both parents! That would give parents the choice to either embrace traditional gender roles - or to carve out their own...

I think choices are wonderful, but unless we start respecting those decisions without judgement, "choice" is really meaningless. Assuming or expecting that a woman will work inside the home and men will work outside the home is damaging to both men and women because it disrespects whatever choice they eventually do make. I hope both my daughter and my son will respect me and look up to me for working outside the home, when I start a new career in the next couple years, and for working inside the home, as I'm doing now.

@Mrs. Jacks: The "expectation" thing bugs me and brings up an example for me, at a going away party for all the employees leaving the job (me included) every single person said to me, "Oh you're going to stay home with the baby?" After the fifth time I was asked I became annoyed, not because I think there is something wrong with staying home, but because everyone assumed/expected I was.

People were not asking the father who was leaving if he was staying home.