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Pregnant after m/c and anxiety

  1. sweetooth

    nectarine / 2705 posts

    So glad to see you on here again And sharing your wonderful news of positive beta numbers! I'm sorry to hear that your dad is so negative. My only advice is to shut him out. I cut out several people in my life while I was dealing with infertility and in the beginning of my pregnancy. It was the only way I could deal with all of the thoughts I was already battling in my head. I didn't need any help from others to add to the negative or worries in my head. It may sound heartless - but it's the best thing I did for myself. Once you feel safe enough to let people back in, they will understand. And if they don't...that speaks volumes.

  2. MrsCastro

    persimmon / 1491 posts

    @spaniellove first of all Congratulations!!! so happy for you!!!

    I would just stay away from dad for a minute...atleast until you get to a point to where you are comfortable sharing the news without him making comments that may hurt...

    sending you all the positive vibes!!!

  3. Lindsay05

    pomegranate / 3759 posts

    Congrats!! Sorry for the unkind words from your dad. I have no advice but hope that you can find something to keep your mind off of any negative thoughts. I am praying hard for you

  4. raintreebee

    pear / 1531 posts

    Hi! I have managed my anxiety in pregnancy in a few ways--weekly therapy with someone connected to an infertility clinic who helps me talk out the issues, regular exercise (long walks after my pregnancy became high risk), babying myself (e.g. I don't put myself in stressful situations if I can avoid it, I have low expectations of myself, etc.), and just try to have hope no matter what is going on. Oh and also I have leaned on DH more than ever before. Nothing has been foolproof, and I have anxiety issues to begin with, but these steps have helped somewhat. xoxo

  5. kentuckygirl

    pear / 1786 posts

    Hugs! I am so sorry your family isn't supportive. Know that we are all here for you to lean on. As others have said, but it bears repeating - you are not responsible for your past losses. I really hope and believe that this is your sticky baby, so don't let your dad bring you down. I don't have specific advice on managing anxiety but I did find talking with my therapist led-IF support group to be a huge help this past year, so as others have said, maybe you could find a professional to help you manage the anxiety. Remember, today you are pregnant! Celebrate that and take it one day at a time!!! Hugs, hugs, hugs!

  6. spaniellove

    honeydew / 7916 posts

    @LovelyPlum: A week from Friday...in reality it's not that far away but it sure feels like an eternity.

  7. math.nerd

    apricot / 253 posts

    @spaniellove: I just wanted to chime in to say Congratulations! I spent a few months on the IF check-in boards and you were always so supportive and thoughtful. I've been waiting to hear this great news from you.
    I'm sending good vibes your way (and a few extra so that they can block out some of the not so nice ones you might be getting too).

  8. futuremama

    clementine / 854 posts

    @spaniellove: Congrats on your pregnancy! I'm sorry your dad can't be supportive and isn't excited for you, but many of us here are thrilled. You had nothing to do with any struggles you've had in the past, and I wish you a very long and healthy pregnancy!

  9. swedishfish

    GOLD / coconut / 8266 posts

    Congratulations on your pregnancy! I hope all goes well. Everyone else gave great advice - my mom always told me I had to act like a duck. Quack, quack let it roll off my back!

  10. imbali

    apricot / 347 posts

    @spaniellove: congratulations It is SO hard to go through pregnancy after m/c. I agree with pps about therapy/support from someone who will understand or at least allow your anxiety (which is so normal) and just hold you through it.

    as for advice, what has gotten me through this pregnancy so far after a loss at 20 weeks (that totally felt like my fault) was therapy, and this thought - so many people fall pregnant and don't want to, and no matter what they do they cant make themselves lose the baby. If people who dont want to be pregnant cant make themselves lose the baby, how can someone who wants so badly to have a sticky baby make themselves lose it? I dont know if that's helpful at all or just plain weird, but it felt comforting to me.

    Hugs and wishes for a h&h 9 months

  11. tequiero21

    honeydew / 7968 posts

    Just wanted to say congrats! So excited for u! Sorry about your dad. I think some dads just don't know what to say, especially Korean ones.

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