Hellobee Boards

@runsyellowlites: The way I was reading it was, this mom in the story chose a VBAC because she felt like it was a 'better' way to birth and under her doctors' recommendation- quote from her “I bought into the hype that a vaginal birth was an amazing experience and the ‘true’ way to give birth,” she says when remembering how doctors “dismissed” her concerns."

So, I read it as if she hadn't heard over and over how horrible csections were and that vaginal births were far superior, her decision might have been different. I think in an ideal world, each mom would decide based off her OB or midwife's recommendations, her own research, and her own gut - public judgment and pressure shouldn't come into the mix. By glorifying vaginal births or VBACs that same judgment and pressure is amplified, in my opinion, and that's why previous posters talking about 'bragging points',etc., is relevant.

As someone who has had a c-section and would consider a vbac in the future if I was a good candidate or my doctor recommended it, I found this article terrifying and tragic. I think we sometimes forget that birth can be very risky for mom and baby, whatever the circumstances. I also think it sounds like this mom felt pushed into decisions she was not 100% comfortable with, and that's sad. Moms should be empowered to make choices with good information, but should also keep in mind that birth can be risky even in the best circumstances.

@deerylou: I'm sorry people around you are making you feel uncomfortable! From my experience, there will always be people to disagree with your parenting decisions no matter what they are. I've been given grief both for breastfeeding and for supplementing formula (by different people). I was essentially called stupid or crazy for the natural birth I planned, and then given grief by others for the c-section I ended up having. I think it's not helpful to compare who would get more support or acceptance, because you can't please everyone (and don't need to- you just need to do what's right for you and your baby!), and because it depends on who you're with. I try to avoid comparisons like that, because they only make me feel bad ("comparison is the thief of joy").

@LittleFox: I'm not saying the comparisons are fair - quite the contrary, actually! Personally, I wish women could birth, nourish, and raise their children without the constant microscope element. But, in my personal experience, there is an indisputable sway towards certain childbirth and parenting decisions (which may vary, depending on culture, or demographics) that back many women into a corner of shame. Like @scg00387 mentioned, the cited article did speak to a glorification of natural, vaginal birth, which contributed to this particular woman feeling pressured into a birth experience she had sincere reservations about.

@JoJoGirl: "At the end of the day, if a woman trusts her provider, she should be empowered to make whatever decision they think is best." Definitely. And this is why finding a provider, network, and facility that align with *your* beliefs are so crucial in fostering a positive experience and outcome.