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I had so much anxiety about labor...more specifically what we would do with DD1 if I went into spontaneous labor! It was bad...

All I could do was plan/prep like crazy with all kinds of back up plans. It made me feel better but not completely.

At the end of the day I had a scheduled induction so it was all calm and prepped floor!

31 weeks and not at all worried, which worries me! We have made zero preparations for this baby. I kind of figure I'll just get stuff done on maternity leave. DH also just got laid off Monday and still not concerned about anything lol. Maybe it will hit eventually?! The one thing I'm most concerned about is getting out the door on time once o go back to work in the fall. I just I just feel more prepared this time in that I know what to expect when it comes to life with a newborn. My inlaws are both retired and watch DD 3x a week so I know I'll have tons of help if I need it. I just want DH to get out dryer fixed so I can was clothes again lol!

I'm feeling very anxious. I have a 12 month old and am due to give birth in just over another month. I'm worried about labor (because I remember how scary that was), I'm scared I won't be able to give enough love to both my kids, I'm worried about logistics of caring for two, I'm so tired now that I'm worried I'm not being a good mom right now.... all of it...

I think it is completely normal, but who knows maybe I need a therapist?!

@yerpie110: how old is your first? This gives me hope that I don't have to worry lol! DD1 is so easygoing and everyone is telling me that will change once #2 arrives, and I don't doubt it may, but I just don't see it being horrible. I think the logistics of getting into a schedule with 2 is going to be the hardest part, not DD1s behavior.

Yes, I was more anxious because I was worried about how it was going to affect DD1 (she did great, went so much better than expected). I was more anxious in general with this last pregnancy because it was my double rainbow baby, and I was terrified of another loss.

I was so so anxious and stressed - I feel like I didn't really get excited about the baby because I was so worried about how my older son would react. I felt terribly guilty and sad about taking away attention and time from him. But the reality has been so much better than I feared, it's gone really well, which is a huge relief.

I was very stressed it manifested itself as total denial about birth. My first delivery was traumatic and I didn't deal with it so I kind of ignored the fact that #2 was coming. I wanted a doula but didn't want to talk about birth 1 so I never called one. I thought a lot about needing to make a plan for LO1, but I never actually forced myself to. The day before I went into labor DH got our neighbor's number so we could text them. I filled out my required birth plan the night before I delivered. I was so in denial about everything I was certain I was timing my contractions wrong and not really in labor when they were 2 min apart.

@Cherrybee: kudos to you for working with a therapist.

I think it's normal to feel stressed when you're juggling a lot, when you already know that the newborn days are kind of tough, and when you're pulled two different ways worrying how you'll give both kids your attention.

An organizing compulsion is good, I think... I know you're tired, but it gives you a productive outlet for your worry and anxiety. I can totally relate. I had a tough time when DD was born, and spent a lot of time cleaning out my closet and selling my old stuff on EBay. I think it made me feel like I'm doing something about the situation, and kept me from more destructive behavior. And I freed up some closet space... Only it was promptly filled up with toys

@Cherrybee: You know the bulk of my issues during pregnancy with DS2 but to answer your question, yes. I was terrified of dieing during birth, my child being still born, killing myself after pregnancy due to PPD/PPA, and those sort of things. I also wanted DS1 big boy room to be PERFECT so I felt like I was taking anything away from him by giving his furniture to the baby (really, like he would care!), I wanted to nursery to be perfect because I didn't want this baby to miss out on anything DS1 got.

I have bonded with this baby more that I did with DS1 and this makes me feel horrible but there is nothing I can do. Slowly, I can feel my relationship with DS1 rebounding and becoming good and whole again so I am very excited about that. Seeking help is all you can do and you are doing it. On the other side, I can tell you that majority of my anxiety and stress was for nothing. It'll all work out friend!

Yes.

I'm anxious less about the birth and more about having another newborn. DS was a really, really difficult newborn, so I"m just hoping upon hope that DD will be more easygoing--especially as I deal with a 2yo at the same time.

I"m dealing with a lot of guilt right now, actually, at 31 weeks that I am so very tired and can't spend time with DS and play and run around with him. These are the last few months of him being an only, and he just turned 2 last week and is SO fun right now.

Mostly I"m worried about paying for it all. Daycare for two is a second mortgage payment and I just hope we can hold it all together.

Yes I was absolutely anxious before number two and I am again before number 3, and normally my friends would describe me as "calm, cool and collected". Things that worried me:
who would take care of LO1
if I would be able to have a vbac
worried about being separated from baby if I ended up with another c/s + trouble BF (trauma from first time around)
taking care of two kids on my own (we had no family/help and DH was super busy)

This time I'm again concerned about:
who will take care of LO1 and LO2
if I will be able to have natural birth/who will be midwife on call/what hospital "policy" I will have to deal with
how the kids will adjust because they are older now
taking care of 3 kids by myself

So basically my list is the same...

So far my biggest concern up until this point was what if I go into labor early and I don't have a plan for DS1? We don't have family nearby, but we do have his daycare providers and friends and a regular sitter, so I'm sure we would have been fine, but I just didn't want to make things jarring for him since he's a very routine-motivated child.

We just got our C-section date yesterday and while I thought it would make me feel better since I could finally plan for DS' care, but it turned into this HUGE drama-filled thing with my family (I had been wondering if my mother would be willing to fly up the day before and stay with my son while I was in the hospital) and I spent most of yesterday like completely upset about it. Long story short, my two friends will be coming over to stay with my son, which I feel okay about, but the family drama at 8 months pregnant is not welcome at all.

I'm starting to get more OCD about organizing the house and cleaning, but I think a lot of that has to do with the fact that my in-laws will be coming a few days after the baby is born and then my family I guess is coming 2 weeks after the baby is born. I don't like guests being in my home when its messy and disorganized, especially because my parents are hypercritical about everything. We had a housecleaner come do a deep clean, I want to defrost my fridge and freezer, and we need to get a carpet cleaning service in to shampoo the floors before the baby is born.

I did organize our closets, the baby clothes, and wash all DS' hand me downs. And I hoarded diapers and wipes. So I guess I did SOME things for the baby. I just ordered BFing supplements, got new pump supplies, and pulled my nursing clothes out of storage. I guess I should load the carseat in the minivan and pack a hospital bag at some point!

We're not doing a nursery for the second baby - we're going totally lazy 2nd child on this. He'll sleep in our room or in the guest room in the bassinet or PNP until we figure out what to do about DS1's crib/bed situation. I feel sorta bad, but at the same time, its not like DS1 ever noticed anything I ever did to decorate for him, even now at 19 months. I figure when the time comes to pull DS1's big boy room together, we can figure out what to do for DS2.

DS1 was an awful colicky reflux baby and I had PPD/PPA with him, but I'm oddly not that anxious about it because we've put so many things in place to try and help my transition to 2 kids. DS1 will stay in daycare full-time, we have a regular sitter, we have a contract with a nanny agency should I need to hire a mommy's helper or night doula or something, and I know now how to advocate and fight for the right treatments should DS2 also have reflux. I'm going to give it a good try, but I'm also not going to kill myself over exclusively breastfeeding like last time. I ended up combo feeding DS1 due to low supply anyway and I will be perfectly happy to do it again without the months of frustration I endured the last go around. My OB and DH are already all over me about the PPA/PPD and I wont hesitate to go on meds a second time, whereas last time I fought it for a few weeks.

I'm also not that anxious about DS1 and the new baby. I just sorta feel like there's nothing we can do about it - the baby is coming - and they'll bond at some point. I'm just in the throws of the 18 month regression and trying to constructively deal with his tantrums, so I'm a little worried about how to handle that on little sleep and a newborn, but I guess I'll just have to face that when it comes!

@catomd00: she turned 3 a month after dd2 arrived and honestly, she has adored her sister from the second she laid eyes on her! I'm sure that will change once dd2 starts to get into her toys there were struggles surrounding learning to share me, but she is easily redirected and I have made sure to include plenty of one on one time with her. It has been sweet to watch her relationship with DH blossom though (she was 110% mama's girl pre baby, and now she's "only" 90% haha). Wishing you the best as you prepare for baby 2, it's going to be great!!

@Anagram: this made me feel so much better! People look at me like I have 5 heads when I saw I'm 31 weeks and literally have done nothing nor plan to do much more than clean the house up and wash some
Newborn clothes lol. I figure I'll get other stuff done on maternity leave or whenever really?! I've got boobs, diapers, clothes and a pack n play. What more do you need?! Lol