Hellobee Boards

I just said "life doesn't have enough surprises, so we're waiting to find out." People usually were okay with that.

Usually people would say something like, "oh good for you, I'm not patient enough for that!" Or "I like to plan way too much." None of my closest friends found out either. I never got any negative responses and people seemed to have fun guessing.

I like to give quilts to my closest friends so my options are more limited. Not a big deal. But I always wish I knew so I could tweak and personalize the blanket more. I'm happy my friends aren't anti quilt/blanket ungratefuls.

We are waiting to find out, and I don't think I've had a negative reaction from anyone. To the contrary, most people are delighted that we're going to be surprised.

@blackbird: I'm a knitter, and I always think the baby gifts I make are plenty "personal" without having to have a traditionally gendered color scheme.

@lady baltimore: @blackbird: my mom crochets blankets and sweaters for new babies, and the neutral ones are still plenty personal, but she has patterns that are specifically boy or girl that she likes better and thinks are cuter. It's not like she thinks people should find out for that reason, but she was happy that I did find out for this pregnancy so she could make a little girl sweater instead of a neutral one.

@Foodnerd81: yes I have very specific fabric for each!

@lady baltimore: Neutral is actually much harder to piece together (I do animal quilts so they're a little more detailed). It can be done (and has), but it's a lot less color to work with! And sometimes the neutral ones just look a little blah in comparison. I think knitting lends itself to more "personalized neutrals" like you make (or the hats I used to knit).

I just like to make things gender specific if I can!

Ha. I'm trying to convince my sister to find out because I want to know NOW, lol.

I don't find people not finding out annoying, but when a person close to me hasn't found out I am always dying to know and it prolongs it. But my commentary would be more like "I'm dying to know", not "you're annoying". The only thing I find annoying is when people know but won't tell you.

@lady baltimore: you'd probably find this quilt pretty gender neutral then, but to me, it's a "boy" quilt!

I think it's only annoying if they know but won't tell. I also find it annoying when people don't share the name but meh.

We were TG both times, and will be this time as well. We never had any negative responses - just the typical 'oh I could never have that much patience' response. Most of the older generation were really happy we weren't finding out as they appreciate it is one of the true surprises in life! Also, in my friend circle, nearly all of us were TG for our pregnancies (eleven out of thirteen babies) so it wasn't unusual for us not to find out.

Also, having had both of my babies in Australia, we don't have many ultrasounds at all - a dating scan if necessary, the optional NT scan, and the anomaly scan at 20 weeks - so it wasn't a huge issue of medical staff potentially slipping up. I asked the midwives after the 20 week scan if the sex was written down anywhere and they said nope, there was no need to note it anywhere so no one one knew what we were having at all.

We didn't find out with our twins and while a lot of people were also excited for the surprise there were quite a few very annoyed and horrified people! "How could you not find out?! How will you decorate their room without knowing?! Pick out gear & clothes?! And omg, just how can you stand not knowing?!" Like looch said, there are very few surprises left in life and this is one. It was fun & I'm so glad we didn't find out. And to be honest, I did get a bit of satisfaction from driving people nuts. Heh.

I knew I wanted to find out because it would help me bond to think of the baby as a boy, call him by his name, plan his baby book and so on. That's because I am type A. However, I admire people who are laid back and can wait until delivery and I had several friends do so!!!! Not annoying whatsoever.

I didn't have the patience to wait but I think it would be such a fun surprise. It seems like there is so much gender neutral stuff out there too! I don't think it's annoying at all. We have a son but our nursery could be for either gender really.

@blackbird: that's beautiful- and I would certainly use it for my daughter but I do think it leans boyish.

@lady baltimore: my mom usually uses neutral colors still, except maybe trimming with pink or purple or blue if she knows the moms preference. But it's the actual patterns, like she likes this one little man cardigan, or a little girl one that has a smocked type front. She actually has mentioned that there are more cute knitting patterns that are neutral but she prefers to crochet.

Yep. I got lots of passive aggressive comments about our TG choice even from some people who I consider friends. It was annoying, but it was good preparation for being a parent. Everyone has an opinion about your choices. I learned that pretty early.

Are you sure you're not mistaking surprise for horror/negative feedback? I tend to think most people don't really care what gender other people are having except the grandparents.

The only negative thing I can think one is that people use it to build up their pregnancy for attention. But I think the same of over the top gender reveals so...

Welcome to parenting, someone will always think you're doing it wrong! Don't worry about them and do what you want.

I only find it annoying when people know the gender but keep it a secret for everyone else to know but themselves. Otherwise I think team green (where the parents don't know, too) is super fun!

@Torchwood: That sucks. People need to get a life if that bothers them...

I find it so odd that anyone would be annoyed, or rude, about that!

I can understand folks wanting to shop for the baby, but just get creative!