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I can't speak for myself since luckily we did not struggle to conceive DD.

But growing up, me and my siblings all knew that we were fertility treatment babies. My parents did not have to make the jump all the way to IVF like you but it took them months of injecting meds to get pregnant with all of us (TTC for 18 months with me, 13 with my sister and 9 with my brother - and they went straight to fertility treatments with the second two).. They have always been up-front about it which I appreciate.

When my daughter is older, I will share that I had a miscarriage before I had her. I don't want it to be something hidden, so I'll tell her when she can understand what it means. I don't want to wait until she's trying to have her own kids to share and have her feel like I wasn't open about it or felt ashamed.

I think it's important to talk openly with kids (when they're old enough to understand) about things like infertility, loss, adoption. I want my kids to understand that there are different ways to make a family, and that everyone has their own struggles.

I didn't have IF, but since our kids are about a year more apart than we wanted originally, I could see that maybe being mentioned if we were ever talking about how far apart our kids are. We don't really know why it took a lot longer the second time around, aside from maybe my being sick and losing a decent amount of weight, so there aren't really any details to tell other than that.

@Mamaof2: I think it matters so they can be aware they might have fertility issues one day.

I will tell my LO because it's part of her adoption story.

@Mamaof2: that's true! I just want to make sure she knows it's a possibility when she's at the point of trying to conceive herself. I wouldn't tell my LO at a young age if it wasn't a big part of her adoption story.

I don't know...I guess only if it came up or seemed relevant for some reason. We had an IUI with DS#1 after being diagnosed with unexplained infertility. And DS#2 came about naturally without really trying. I think it might be different if they were girls and were at the point of trying themselves. We really haven't shared the details with many of our friends and family beyond it took a lot longer than expected and we had to have assistance.

I will. We didn't end up needing fertility treatments, but it took us a long time to conceive. I want her to understand that it's not always easy.

Also, last Christmas I made a shutterfly book for her called "the day I was born", and it talks about waiting and praying for a long time.

Yes. My mom was very open about her struggles to have me. I don't remember a time where I didn't know. I'm grateful she told me because I was able to prepare myself in case I had trouble conceiving. I think that's why I'm okay with my infertility (well, as okay as you can be when you want a baby!). It's always just been a part of my life. If I have a girl I am definitely going to be open about it. I have a son and I will answer any questions he has, who knows if he and his partner will be dealing with it someday.

1 in 8 couples will experience infertility. If we talk about it, maybe it won't be such a shock when the time comes.

I can only imagine my future daughters being interested in this info. Like my mother shared with me, I will share that I miscarried. She spoke so freely about it I just figured it was a right of passage. I'll be open about how long it took the first time to even get pregnant.

My mom miscarried during my 6th birthday party, so I have been aware that it can happen for decades.

@KT326: I agree with this. It's never been something I've been afraid to talk about, because I've known it was a possibility for as long as I can remember.

I probably will, I feel like I would be keeping a secret from them if I didn't. At least with IVF - I'm not sure I would if it just took me a little longer, or we conceived with iui (unless they asked).

I have no need to keep IF a secret so sure. I'd share any of our struggles with them.

My IF is caused by endometriosis, which runs strongly though families. I want my daughter to be aware of what endometriosis is and what he symptoms are so we can get her on birth control as soon as possible if she exhibits the same signs. I was never on hormonal birth control so I don't know how much of the spread could have been controlled, but I want to give her a shot at preserving her fertility. Not to mention being on BC could help minimize the painful periods that I've always experienced.

My kids are twins so I think this is much more likely to come up naturally, too (especially since they have IVF twin cousins as well). As it is I'm constantly answering questions from people who ask me if they're natural!

Well, we didn't end up having to use IVF for our babies (we were in the beginning stages of RE testing after 3 years and some other health issues when I got pregnant the first time, and then we got pregnant immediately the second time when we started NTNP). But our results showed we would have had a very difficult time conceiving naturally (like we'd need ICSI, etc.) so we realize our babies are total miracles. So we'll tell them that's what they are - because we weren't supposed to be able to have them!