I have so much love and respect for Surro mamas. I kind of loved being pregnant (though maybe that's my baby fever talking) but I don't know if I'd ever be able to grow a little one for 40 weeks and then hand him/her over. That must be super hard. Could you be a surrogate mama?
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Oh gosh. I ask myself this all the time and I really go back and forth. Perhaps after I had all of my kids I could do it, but it would be hard to not connect with this baby and then have to give it away.
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No way! I did not like being pregnant enough to carry a baby for someone else.
But wait, do surrogates get paid? If so....maybe.
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@marionberry: I agree, it would definitely have to be after I'm done having my own. DH wondered if we did it, what if it ignited my baby fever all over again after we called it done? lol!
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I agree it would be very difficult to not have an instant bond with that baby. On the other hand, it would be very rewarding being able to help somebody out with the greatest gift in life.
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@mediagirl: I think in some cases they do! Especially if Tina Fey movies count as a source
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Emotionally I just couldn't. It would be too hard on me!
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Nope. Pregnancy was tough!
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Never! Pregnancy is just too much on my marriage & family to be doing it for someone else!
My ex DID ask me if I'd ever consider being willing to be one for him & his wife if they couldn't conceive on their own though! Talk about awkward!
ETA: Just to clarify this was NOT G's bio-dad
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@runsyellowlites: really? He has a LOT of nerve to ask you that
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Sure if it comes with a tummy tuck, breast lift, and shopping I spree. Wait, that's what I want post my own baby's birth. Surrogacy would not work for me and my marriage.
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I have thought about it. I have to see how my body handles pregnancy first.
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@prettylizy: You're probably thinking it was G's bio-dad, but no... this is another ex. He still tries to chat with me occasionally & it was really really weird when he asked! How the heck do you answer that without sounding like a complete arse?!
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@runsyellowlites: I was thinking G's bio-dad. Okay, well that is a little less awkward, but awkward none the less!
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@prettylizy: Had it been G's bio-dad I would've laughed in his face & not thought twice about it!
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I don't think I could do it. Maybe after I'm done having babies, for the right person (or if I'm being completely honest the right price) but I'm doubtful even then.
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Too selfish w my body emptions and time. I couldn't do it.
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I was just thinking about this this morning! I think I would do it for a family member or close friend. But not for a stranger. I agree in that it would be hard to hand the baby over but I would try and mentally prepare myself for that during pregnancy.
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@mediagirl: it would have to be a sh!tload of money
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For someone close to us, like a family member or best friend, I'm pretty sure I would do it. Or if a celebrity asked me
Otherwise, nope.
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I don't think so. The pregnang state is not my favourite, plus I'm not sure how I could go home empty-handed.
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It depends. Once I hate all of my babies, if someone really really really close to me (ie my sister) couldn't have children I think I would offer to her. But I wouldn't do it for anyone else but my sisters.
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@char54: I'm pretty sure you meant have not hate, but it still reads pretty funny !lol!
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At this point, I don't think I would be a good candidate (MTHFR, etc.), so I wouldn't want to risk putting someone else in the position of potential sadness.
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@prettylizy: lol!!! I definitely did mean have!! hahaha
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I've thought a lot about it and wish i could, but I have health issues so I can't. I get severe migraines that get worse while pregnant and I have to take meds for them. I just wouldn't feel right taking meds while carrying someone else's baby..... But I don't have a choice about taking them.
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@aprk: yeah. It would have to be enough for me to quit my job!!
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Heck no!
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I would in a heartbeat. I love being pregnant but brining home the baby and caring for it eh (note I love my son but want to be pregnant more times than I want kids to raise). We do ivf for all of our babies so that isn't a concern either. Going through some of that makes me more sensitive to that part of it as well. If I can help someone be a mom I want to because it is so hard when that isn't as easy.
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I couldn't do it. Being pregnant was hard on me physically. And I bonded pretty intensely with DS while he was in utero. I couldn't imagine carrying someone else's baby.
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I wish I could. It's a beautiful and wonderful thing and I have so much respect for women that do it, but I'm just not strong enough. I couldn't handle it emotionally.
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I would if it was all their genetic material. I loved being pregnant and I loved the high of birthing and I would love to be able to give the gift of a baby to a couple that can't otherwise have kids. DH on the other hand is not so keen on the idea of his wife being a rent-a-womb.
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I would do it for my sister in a heartbeat. But that's probably it.
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No....I can't can't imagine..
Then again, I can't imagine turning down my sister (for example). There is always someone else who would do it for her if that were her situation (God forbid) or adoption. -
I would consider it for my sister, but that's about it. Also, I have to see how this whole delivery things goes. But theoretically, if I was done having my kids and one of my sisters couldn't carry a child but she and her husband could make an embryo, AND I was still young enough for it not to be high risk, I would think strongly about it. However, I don't think that could ever happen at this point-- I'm 32 now, few more years before #2, leaves me getting into a higher risk age, and I probably wouldn't want to risk anything with my own little ones at home.
So.... theoretically yes, but in reality, probably not. Plus DH said he wouldn't want me to because he'd be too afraid something would happen to me and we'd have our own kids to think about.
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No. I hate pregnancy, and it's just not the right decision for our family.
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Yep. Except pregnancy and I don't get along. Also, I'm not sure I could deal if the mom wanted me to do certain things (like avoiding certain foods or a natural labour)
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I've never had a baby, so I have NO idea. I've always been in the camp of thinking pregnancy & birth is sooo beautiful & special, but I don't think I could emotionally handle handing a baby over. The exception would likely be for my sister or a best friend. It's a lot of responsibility too!!
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I'd only do it for my sisters.
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I considered it before getting pregnant, and now having gone through 30w so far, there's just no way. Between becoming emotionally attached and just not. liking. pregnancy. at all... nope.
Otherwise, nope.
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56 comments