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@swedishfish: glad I'm not the only one! Any time I picture a milestone it's immediate years. Part of it is that I was so sure she would be a boy and there's just something about picturing helping my daughter pick out a prom dress or whatever that just gets right to me. But it's mostly hormones.
People with slightly older babies on here, are your Los interested in toys yet? Or grabbing at things? I'm wondering when she will be interested in her play mat with the dangling toys (which my dog thinks is a new doggy bed).
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@Cherrybee: oh poor baby! I can imagine how that feels (I have my own tummy issues).
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@Foodnerd81: @swedishfish: LO is about to outgrow her swaddleme doohickey....and it made me cry last night thinking of having to buy her a bigger one. Yay hormones!!
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@Foodnerd81: LO is starting to get moderately interested in her play mat. She looks at herself in the mirror, and looks around when I shake the toys/make noise. She doesn't grab for anything yet though. I can't wait until she starts interacting more!
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@grizz: I'll let you know how it goes! I'm hoping for miracles so I can out the pump away for a while...
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@Bookworm: I had to retire DDs newborn clothes yesterday. She's only on the 20th percentile (7lb 12oz at 3 weeks) but she looks huge compared to when we brought her home. Its bittersweet...
I think I'm having hormone issues. I feel so down and weepy. I don't think I'm depressed .... but I just feel so crappy and like I'm shit at this mum thing. Plus I keep dreaming that E dies. Last night I dreamed that I accidentally drowned her in the bath. She was all swollen and blue. It was horriffic.
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@Cherrybee: oh god that's a horrible nightmare! I can't imagine. Poor thing waking up from that.
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@Foodnerd81: @Bookworm: I'm glad I'm not the only emotional one as well!
LO is 7 weeks old and she's just started to be kind of interested in the play mat. She likes the bouncer my parents have more.
@Cherrybee: the first five to six weeks were really hard for me. I felt inadequate and sad and very overwhelmed. But I think you should talk to someone. It might make you feel better.
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@Cherrybee: oh what an awful dream
I'm having pretty bad weepy days myself. I've cried more in the last week than I did in all the weeks prior. @swedishfish: my LO is six weeks now... So you're giving me hope that I'll feel better soon! And you too Cherrybee!!
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So glad I finally made it back on hb!!!
Baby's birthday: August 1
Baby's gender: boyM is 2 weeks old today! Can't believe it's already been that long since I pushed him out! He's an incredibly cute little boy, very curious and strong, and more and more fun to be around every day!
Labour and delivery were tough (I was induced, no epi) and the first few days in the hospital I felt totally out of it. Things didn't improve when we got home and I spent his first week crying and wishing I could return him somehow because I felt there was no way I would ever be able to take care of him properly.. Thank you, pp hormones! We also had some breastfeeding issues during that week (supplementing with formula, pumping, using nipple shields, I've done it all already), and when I had a LC visit at home she basically made me feel like shit because I was trying everything they had taught me in the hospital but according to her this was all wrong and damaging our mother-son relationship. Luckily, DH made it clear we didn't appreciate her approach and politely told her we wouldn't be needing her help anymore. So I struggled on and met with another LC this week and she assured me that I'm doing it right and to hang in there. I knew M was getting enough milk because he's growing like crazy, but as it turns out I have oversupply (I know, luxury problem) and strong milk ejection which makes him choke while nursing and causes cramps and gas.. On top of that we're both dealing with thrush.. But I found some great info about both on the LLL website and am now trying their tips - so far he's sleeping and eating much better and I'm finally starting to feel like myself again (or at least some of the time)!DH has been my hero, doing everything around the house and trying to keep me sane at the same time - I don't know how I would've survived that first week without him!
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@Cherrybee: I have nightmares like that too! Only I dream I've stuffed him under my pillow and then I wake up frantically searching for him in our bed, saying "where's M, where's M" over and over until DH points out he's safe and sound in his crib!
I'm sort of glad I'm not the only one feeling inadequate and overwhelmed at being a mom, but I wish none of us had to feel this way!
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@Cherrybee: I ran a little long bathing/brushing them and she ended up screaming for her next meal :(. When we first came home from the hospital the house smelled odd to me. I think it was the litter box -- we have an automatic box but it had been a while since it had been changed (pee doesn't get collected, just solids). So glad I'm not pregnant any more and can clean the box! <--priorities straight
I also went cleaning-crazy last night in the shower. I put off doing it while pregnant because I didn't want any weird chemicals getting to the baby, and DH didn't do it to my standards.
Poor E, tummy troubles are the worst :(. Hope it clears up soon.
@Foodnerd81: what is it with guys and farts? My DH now has a recording of her farting (lol).
@Cherrybee: aww, honey, you're a great mum! It's so hard to be responsible completely for another human being when nothing can quite prepare you for it except going through the experience.
I was sitting at the computer desk a few days ago with Ella in my lap, and I guess I was leaning forward because when I glanced down to check on her her one arm was purple from being pushed against the desk! I felt so, so horrible.
Also, when we put her in the carseat to go home DH went to do something for a moment (packing up bags?) and I tightened the strap on the carrier without realizing that it pulls from the top, not the bottom...nearly strangled poor E, she screamed bloody murder and I again felt awful.
I have also probably come close to dropping her a few times...when she flops unexpectedly (anyone else's LO do that like a wounded seal sometimes?), or when I'm carrying her plus something else.
I cried the one night in the hospital. DH left for home to take care of the dogs and it didn't make sense for him to make the trip back, so I was left with LO all by myself for the first real night and she screamed the entire time, I couldn't get her to latch properly...it was misery. I have never felt so inadequate. I wouldn't let him go the second night.
If your feelings continue, please go talk to someone? You've had a lot to deal with in a very short period of time, and it would be distressing to the best of people, let alone someone with PP hormones on top of it. *hugs*
@mrsvdv: Welcome to M! I know, I got somewhat conflicting LC comments as well, and it's so aggravating/upsetting! Good on you guys for finding an LC who supported you.
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Hi everyone! Trying to get some online time while LO is napping.
Baby's birthday: 7/25
Baby's gender: boyMy baby is 3 weeks old and I have no idea how the time went by that fast! Things are going well. I feel guilty because I gave up on breast feeding after only 2 weeks. My nips were cracked, bleeding, and felt like a knife was repeatedly slicing through every time he sucked. Now that I'm bottle feeding it feels like a weight has been lifted off my shoulders. I wish it had worked out, but to me it wasn't worth the stress and the tears. I give you ladies props for sticking to it despite your challenges!
Another challenge has been the sleep deprivation. Last night was the first night I got a few 3 hour stretches and I feel like a new woman this morning! I do miss sleeping in the same bed as DH though. I don't want him waking up all night since he has to work so I've been sleeping in the guest bedroom with LO.
I too was an emotional wreck the first couple of weeks. I felt such an overwhelming love for him and would cry at just the thought of anything bad ever happening to him or a bully at his future school making him sad. On the other hand I found myself also grieving the loss of my old life and freedom and having it be just me and DH. It's crazy what a huge adjustment it is to bring a NB home. At 3 weeks PP, my hormones have finally stabilized. -
Its good to hear I'm not the only one wobbling all over the place. Thanks for the support everyone. Today has been a good day, I'm just keeping my fingers crossed for a good evening. We left E with my MIL for half an hour today while we went to buy a dishwasher. I cried like an idiot when I left her. Ugh. Crazy hormones.
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Oh my gawd y'all. LO has only taken one 2 hour nap today, and I've been awake since 330am. Heeeeeeeelp
I just passed her off to DH and am going to try and nap. Please tell me the six week growth spurt only lasts like, two days!?
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@Bookworm: Oh dear! I hope she sleeps well tonight and you can catch up!
C had her 2 week ped appt today (at 17 days) and she is up past her birth weight-- yay! The doctor kept us waiting almost an hour, which was pretty annoying, but it did give me time to feed her since I'd had to wake her from a nap to go up and didn't give her a big feed. I'm going to give pumping a try this weekend and *maybe* leave C with my parents when they visit Sunday night so DH and I can go out to dinner. My parents keep mentioning it, since they'll be here, but since C usually cluster feeds from like, 5-10, I don't know. She tired herself out crying at the ped's office, so she's still sleeping now. I'm rather intimidated by the pump thing!
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@Foodnerd81: no such luck, this has been her worst night in a while
good luck pumping! I don't like it much but it is really helpful when we go out. LO cluster feeds in the evening too lately, I feel like I'm attached to her all night!
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Oh and username change on my end, fyi!
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@Bookish: must be a growth spurt for your baby. It sucks but it helps to attach a reason, right? And hey, I'm up too if it helps
Actually c just slept her longest stretch ever- after cluster feeding all night, she fella sleep after ten and didn't wake up until after 3! We also had a milestone- I nursed her in public. After my two week pp appt I fed her in the lobby of the hospital, with a light blanket to cover. I was so proud of myself! And per her ped appt yesterday she is above birthweight now. Great job, baby girl!
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@Foodnerd81: haha for a second I was OMG I woke her up by posting! lol!! YAY baby foodnerd! That's so awesome! Major kudos for nursing in public; I haven't attempted it yet...it scares the bejeezus out of me.
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@Bookish: I figured I was in a kind of hippie dippie hospital anyway (midwives, birth center) in a very pro bf town, so why not? Plus baby was hungry and we had a car ride. I also fed her in the parking lot of target in the back seat of our car but that was less smooth- we were both sweaty messes by the end.
I hope baby bookish chills out and let's her ma a sleep soon!!
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@Bookish: Oh my good lord, you poor thing. That's just brutal. I hope you get some sleep soon. Gah! What's with the UN change? I like it!
@Foodnerd81: Yay for BF in public!! And yay for C being above her birth weight. Go mama!!
I had a good day yesterday, followed by a good evening and a good night! E woke to eat every 2 hrs - and kept me awake in between by sleeping noisily - but I can totally cope with that as long as she is calm and not in pain. I think these new Dr Browns bottles may have cracked it! Touch wood!
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@Cherrybee: I'm pretty much a zombie at this point. I'm so glad it's Friday! As for username change, I felt like changing it up
so glad you are having a good night/day!! Amazing how a thing like bottles can change things!
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@Cherrybee: that's great that she had a good day and you found bottles that help!! So much trial and error for something so important but it sounds like you found something that's working. I hear you on the loud sleeping. It's amazing how loud our delicate little girls can be!
I forgot - one other big milestone, we are sleeping in the master bedroom again. I've been sleeping in the nursery until now. I missed sharing a bed with Dh! Plus I love our bed and its so much more comfortable than the one in the nursery. Big steps.
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@Foodnerd81: Do you have C in there with you? I have E beside me in her moses basket but that has been hard - I freak out when she cries because it wakes DH up (cue feelings of inadequacy). But last night, DH took his nightly medication (for his arthritis. Its a pain killer that's also used as a sleeping pill and knocks him out). It meant I had to do all the wake ups but it was so liberating not having to worry about DH waking up and not being able to go back to sleep!
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@Bookish: Hugs. Do you think you can get a nap in?
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@Cherrybee: yup we have her in here. Dh is off work tomorrow so I didn't feel too bad if she woke him, and if he started really crying I was planning to bring her into the living room anyway. She usually is more if a loud grunter than crier when she wakes up. My mom is coming and staying the week, then mil, an they are staying in the nursery, so she needs to be with us then anyway. Dh woke for a few seconds but he's a heavy sleeper.
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@Cherrybee: I hope so. She woke up at 230 and then went back to bed but fussed so loud in her sleep that it kept us up. I'm going to have to make a coffee run; I wish DH liked coffee so I had some in the house!
Plus, it looks like I'll be taking her to the Dr today. She had what looked like bad baby acne for a week...then it started to look like heat rash/eczema. It's starting to spread to her chest so I want to get it checked out
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@Bookish: R's six week growth spurt lasted two or three days. It was terrible! I hope you get some answers at the doctors today!
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@Bookish: Oh no. Poor G. Did you get any answers at the doctor?
We went to see my friend today. Her little boy is 2 weeks old and he has "sticky eyes". Apparently its normal for some babies but it looks really painful, poor kid. She is bathing them regularly - it must be so hard for her to see.
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Ooh, I must have missed this!
Baby's birthday: 7/16
Baby's gender: Girl
Baby's Name: PMy little gal is a month old, and I cannot believe how quickly the time has flown by. It seems like just yesterday that we met her for the first time. We've adjusted well, as a family, but I do wish DH could have stayed home for much, much longer (he took a generous three weeks, but it didn't seem long enough!). Having him here every day was helpful, and so wonderful.
P is a fantastic baby - she has been sleeping 3-4 hour stretches since birth, and started smiling very early on, which was super reinforcing for us, as parents. We had major trouble breastfeeding, as my milk never fully came in. The stress of my repeated blood patch epidurals (I was part of the 1% of women who had a botched epi, and horrific spinal headaches) really didn't lend itself to an easy go at things. I definitely blamed myself and beat myself up over it for the first few weeks - especially because P was so eager, and had such a great latch - but I have finally reached a place of calm in regards to her being primarily formula fed. I still pump and supplement as much as I can, but I've accepted that it's just not going to work as I initially thought, and try not to drive myself crazy over it.
After loosing quite a bit of weight, P has surpassed her birth weight by a pound and a half. It took a while for us to beef her up, but she's growing more and more every day. I'm looking forward to her outgrowing her NB clothing, since we didn't buy very much of it. I have so many 0-3 month dresses that I'm just waiting to throw her in.
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@deerylou: sounds like a healthy little girl! I hear you on beig excited for her to outgrow nb- we have hardly any and all gender neutral (team green). People have given us SO many aid table girly things starting at 0-3 size and I'm excited to put her in them! But at the same time of course I want her to stay teeny forever.
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@swedishfish: @Cherrybee: I 'sort of' got some answers. I know what it's not! It's not eczema, and it's not an infection or illness. Past that, the doctor said it might be normal baby acne (albeit a bad case) or it could be an allergic reaction. He wants me to try and cut out dairy for a while to see if it helps. I'm also going to cut out formula for a few days to see if that's the culprit, because DUH, the face reaction started around the same time we started a nighttime feed of formula. I feel like an idiot for not connecting the dots sooner. I had to have soy formula as a baby, so if I have to switch her to that, so be it. Means I'll have to pump a ton this weekend, which I'm not looking forward to!!
On the plus side, the little goober has napped TWICE today instead of once, and I even got a little bit of a nap! Thank god. We also went and visited her daddy for lunch at his work today, which was fun! I love getting out of the house!!!
@deerylou: Hey there!! Glad to hear y'all are doing well; aren't baby smiles the best? I could not have survived the last few days without getting those gummy grins from her!
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@deerylou: How are you feeling now? Have the headaches stopped?
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How's. everyone doing today? I just had my first mom fail- c is snuggled up with me in bed after her morning feeding, and she's so cute and snugly I wanted a picture. My phone fell out of my hand and landed on her! She didn't wake up but I feel like such a jerk!
We had a rough cranky day yesterday but my sister and nephew are visiting today and my mom is staying with me all week so that will be nice! For now just enjoying these morning snuggles- without photographic evidence.
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Hit send twice- sorry!
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@Foodnerd81: Aww! Don't worry, she's fine!
keep enjoying those snuggles! We're doing much better today; she took two naps yesterday, slept 6.5 hours, and her rash is clearing up! DH has to work today (boo) but the high today is only 93 (it's been 100+) so I'm going to see if we can hit up an outlet mall or the zoo... Or maybe we'll just be lazy all day haha
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@Bookish: I'm so glad she is sleeping better and feeling better! Hopefully she is out of her growth spurt then? I say, if you want go out, by all means, but if staying in and snuggling sounds good to you, that great too! I understand wanting to get out though. Yesterday Dh was home from work and we wanted to go out and do some errands- took two hours to get out of the house a all we did was a long walk, but I needed to get out! Thank god c likes the moby though or it would have been even worse. I had a teeny break down before left and Dh was like, no! I can't deal with both of my ladies crying at once!
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@Foodnerd81: Oh no! If it makes you feel any better, I've done the same - twice! One time he didn't even stir, but the other he woke up and cried so of course I cried too. I felt awful!
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@grizz: she barely stirred so that made me feel a little better. I probably disturbed her more by kissing her a bunch of times after
so glad you are having a good night/day!! Amazing how a thing like bottles can change things!
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